Authors note:
Ok, so the next full story that I wanted to integrate Rachel into was "No Exit" but I felt that the opening of "Simon Said" and the fact that Dean showed us that a girl was getting under his skin as he did in that episode was important so I added that all into the beginning of this story.
I know that I take a while to update sometimes so I didn't want you guys reading the first chapter and then waiting for the rest of "Simon Said" to unfold in the following chapters so I would like you all to know that this story is fully "No Exit" from the 2nd chapter on.
Thanks for sticking with me and I hope you all enjoy my 8th story in my series =)
Where the Hell was Sam already?
Dean had finished pumping the gas 15 minutes ago and was sitting in the driver's seat of the Impala waiting to Sam to come back from the bathroom. He assumed that Sam was doing more than peeing after 5 minutes so he gave his brother some time.
But at this point Sam had either fallen in or was in trouble so Dean left the warmth of the car and headed toward the small stone building to the right of the gas stations mini mart.
He'd seen Sam enter it and didn't see him come out so He didn't even bother knocking when he reached the door. He turned the knob and found that it was unlocked.
"Sam, come on, zip it up. Let's hit the... road. What?" Dean said as he opened the door.
He'd expected to find Sam sitting on the toilet with his jeans around his ankles. Instead Sam was leaning over the sink, he was blinking water out of his eyes and breathing heavily, his face contorted by what Dean could only guess was pain.
"Sam?" Dean asked, his voice changing from annoyance to concern.
"I just had another vision, Dean." Sam said breathlessly.
Dean's stomach bottomed out at the words.
Sam was stubborn when he wanted to be and right now, he wanted to be. It was early evening as they drove through the farm land of northern Nebraska towards Hastings.
Toward the road house.
Toward Rachel.
"I don't know, man, why don't we just chill out, think about this." Dean argued.
Sam leaned over and turned the radio off. Annoyed himself now at the fact that Dean had been trying to talk him out of going to Hastings to seek Ash's help since they'd left the gas station where Sam had had the vision of a man shooting another in a gun store.
"What's there to think about?" Sam asked.
"I just don't know if going to the Roadhouse is the smartest idea." Dean said.
"Dean, it's another premonition. I know it. This is gonna happen, and Ash can tell us where." Sam argued.
"Yeah, man, but..." Dean started. But Rachel'll be there and I'm trying very hard not be around her.
He didn't say thing out loud of course. Sam didn't need to know that since they'd left the road house about a month ago he'd come to the conclusion that being around Rachel wasn't a good idea for more reason than one.
The first of course being that he'd spilled his guts to her about everything that had happened with his father. On the way back to Bobby's after they'd left that morning he'd asked himself in the car over and over again why he'd done that.
He'd chalked it up to the fact that it had been eating him inside and he'd needed to let it go or it would have made him burst at the seams.
But he knew in the back of his head it was because he felt that he could trust Rachel and that she was in fact, getting under his skin in a way that no one before or since Cassie had.
He couldn't allow that to happen, couldn't get that close to someone again. She'd made no demands on him what so ever, not even after they'd made love in her tree house the night before and for that he was thankful. But he couldn't and didn't want to let her in much as he had again. No matter how wonderful she might be. He just didn't have it in him and wasn't cut out to be tied to a person like that.
So having thought that, he'd decided that it was best not to see her again for a while. Let his head clear and figure out this whole demon and Sam thing first.
And second was the fact that Sam was now having super mondo creepy "visions" NO ONE could know about them. Not even Rachel if he wanted to keep Sam safe and apparently he couldn't trust himself to keep his mouth shut when it came to her.
He'd spoken to her a few times over the month since he'd seen her. And it was always pleasant and flowing when he did. But he kept the conversation down to her living vicariously through him while he hunted. She was burning up in that bar, he could tell and even feel it through the phone so they'd had much to discuss that was within Dean's comfort zone. But now Sam had him pointed in her direction and he was a dumb enough asshole to go along with it.
He could have told Sam no and that would have been it. Put in a phone call to Ash instead of a visit but as much as his brain wanted to stay away from the roadhouse is as much as his soul wanted him to be there.
To see her face with her beautiful green eyes framed by long dark lashes. See that long black hair of hers swinging down her back in a pony tail as she worked the bar in her jeans that hugged her hips just right.
I really am controlled by my dick, aren't I? Dean asked himself.
"Plus it could have some connection with the demon. My visions always do." Sam argued, pulling him from his thoughts.
Dean took the opportunity to go back the BIGGEST reason he didn't want to go to the roadhouse right now. Rachel might have been a driving force to keep his distance under normal circumstances but keeping his brother safe was a bigger reason to stay away.
"That's my point." Dean said vehemently, "There's gonna be hunters there, I don't know if going in and announcing that you're some supernatural freak with a demonic connection is the best thing, okay?"
Sam looked at him pointedly. His eyes almost hurt.
"So I'm a freak now?"
SHIT! I didn't just fucking say that did I? Dean asked himself. He quickly put on a smile and slapped his little brother on his thigh.
"You've always been a freak."
Sam looked away, scolded but not angry. Dean drove and remained silent. Sam was right. The best thing to do was go see if Ash had any leads and if these visions were connected to the demon.
He made a promise to himself that when he saw Rachel he wouldn't get close. He'd keep her at arms lenghth and if she was as awesome as she'd been up to this point she'd understand why.
Rachel shut one of her eyes and looked at the red target through the crosshairs of the rifle she held. She felt the butt flush against her shoulder, the pump firmly under hand and the trigger solid under her finger. All comforting feelings and she felt the confidence well up inside her as she exhaled and took the shot.
The virtual bullet hit the center of the target on the video screen and Rachel quickly moved the barrel up and to the right to line up the next shot. Four targets, all hit dead center in quick succession after that and Rachel heard the agonized groan of the older man standing next to her facing the video game.
"Damn, little lady, that was my room money." He said as Rachel lowered the gun back into its holster and held her hand out for her winnings.
He handed her the five twenty dollar bills and she gave him her best smile.
"Well, I guess you're taking a truck nap tonight." She said as she walked away, pleased with herself and $100.00 richer.
She moved behind the bar to pop open the 2 bottles of bud the men sitting at the 2 top by the door had ordered before she'd made her money and was still in ear shot when she saw her mother walked up to the still pitiful looking patron by the range game.
"Oughta check the high scores before you put your money down." Ellen said in her southern drawl.
Rachel saw her press the menu button that would bring up the credits and display row after row of the top fifteen scores. Every one bore Rachel's name.
"You went and got yourself hustled, Ed." Ellen said before walking away with a slightly proud smirk.
Ed just stared and shook his head at the screen. Rachel took in the moment and was actually happy to be in the bar right then.
She put the beers on a tray and went to deliver them. Here no one thought an almost petite brunette had the skills to shoot a gun, real or virtual so she'd made a tiny fortune on the macho idiots that came and took the challenge.
As of late it had been one of the only things that been helping her keep the itch to get out of here in check. She ached to hold a real rifle again. A rifle full of salt and aim it at some nasties head or drive her now neglected Mustang through a cemetery at night looking a grave to salt and burn.
The job was calling her back and she was resisting it for the sake of her mother. Things like hustling "Target Practice" had become one of the few things that helped her tolerate the need to get Hell out of here.
She delivered the beers and turned back around to clear off one of the recently vacated tables toward the back when she saw the door open.
She caught her breath as first Sam and then Dean Winchester walked through it. Her belly did a little flip at the sight of Dean. Tall and handsome as ever in his jeans, boots and that old leather jacket of his.
His eyes caught hers and she turned toward them in greeting. Reminding herself not to act like a little girl that had a crush, which is what she felt like right at this moment with his unexpected arrival.
"Hey, wasn't expecting you guys. Just can't stay away, huh?" She asked.
"Yeah, looks like." Dean said. She saw something cross his eyes when he looked at her and it wasn't the normal drinking in of her that came with their reunions. It was distant almost. And his facial expression followed the shadow in his eyes, he looked away from her almost immediately. "How are you Rachel?" he asked.
Rachel began to frown but before she could answer him Sam came around to stand before her.
"Where's Ash?" He asked, a note of desperation in his voice.
"In his back room." Rachel answered him. Without another word he brushed passed her and headed toward the back of the bar.
"Hey to you too, Sam." She said to the younger Winchesters retreating back. She then turned back to Dean and nudged her thumb at Sam.
"What's with him?" She asked, genuinely confused.
"Sorry, he's, we're... kind of on a bit of a timetable." He answered and gave her that look again.
They stood looking at each other in silence for a moment. For the first time ever Rachel felt almost uncomfortable in his presence. She knew he felt the same so her natural instinct was to give him the leave she knew he was hoping for.
"Well, don't let me keep you then." She said and moved out of his way.
He gave her an awkward nod of thanks and moved to the back of the bar where Sam was knocking on Ash's door.
She stared at his back for a moment and wondered what the fuck that was all about.
Rachel kept her distance after that. It was clear that he wanted to be left alone so she left him alone. She just wished she knew if was her or the situation they were in that had him acting like this. She'd spoken to him on the phone every now and then since the last time they saw each other and everything seemed fine.
She glanced over to the table where they sat with Ash and his laptop every now and then but tried for the most part not to get too close. The bar was closing up soon so she had a lot to do as patrons left two and three at a time.
She also fought down the very female feelings that threatened to overtake her regarding Dean. She wasn't going to be a typical chick right now so she threw out every hurt and rejected feeling and thought that came to her and tended to her work.
At one point she had to go and clear off a table that was close to them. Right behind the pillar that Dean was leaning against as he listened to Ash and Sam talk. He even gave her a little glace but looked away quickly.
She ignored it and mopped up the spilled beer but in the process she couldn't help over hear a bit of the conversation going on.
"No, sir, nothing. No demon." Ash said as he finished typing something on the lap top.
"All right, try something else for me." Sam said leaning forward in his chair. "Search Guthrie for a house fire. It would be 1983, fire's origin would be a baby's nursery, night of the kid's six month birthday."
Rachel frowned. That was a very specific request and it instantly sounded familiar to her.
"Okay, now that is just weird, man. Why the hell would I be looking for that?" Ash asked, probably just as confused as she was.
It was when Dean looked in her direction and shifted uncomfortably at her proximity that she left without looking at him. This was obviously something he didn't want people, not even her, hearing.
Ash retreated to his room with his laptop. Probably working on looking for the bizarre scenario Sam had set to him.
The bar emptied slowly till there was just Sam sitting alone at a table near the back going through what she recognized as his father's journal, a middle aged couple finishing off the last of a pitcher of pale ale by the pool table, old man Peterson sitting on his stool at one end of the bar and Dean sitting on the other end nursing a beer her mother had poured for him.
She decided that she wasn't going to be upset with him for treating her like she didn't exist tonight. She'd won the battle that her female brain tried to rage against him saying that she deserved to be treated better since she'd let him have certain 'liberties' and that his behavior meant that she'd been used.
Her gut told her that his distance wasn't about rejecting her that way because he was afraid she'd get the wrong idea but more so because he didn't want to get close and that he had a lot on his plate right now.
She prided herself on not letting her emotions get the better of her and listening to reason and logic instead of getting huffy. Maybe she'd been a dude in a past life.
She still stayed away from him though. He looked up at her as she cleaned the tables or brought a drink to someone every now and then but he always looked away from her when she looked in his direction.
Whatever the reason, it was hard for him to be around her right now. And with the bar all but empty she decided that some music might be needed. She could pretend to listen to it as she worked and it would be less awkward with it in the air instead of just dead silence.
But just because she was in the mood, she picked a song that she knew would annoy him just a little. So she made her selection hit the button and the first cords of "I Can't Fight This Feeling" by REO Speedwagon filled the air.
Rachel turned to grab a rag from the bar and caught Dean's eye for the first time since he walked through the door. He looked at her inquisitively as the words of the song floated around them.
"What?" She asked.
"REO Speedwagon?" He asked with an almost amused frown.
She found that she was happy he'd lightened up a bit so she decided to play along and pretended to be a bit insulted.
"Damn right REO. Kevin Cronin sings it from the heart." She shot.
He smiled at her and she found that she was happy to see it.
"He sings it from the hair. There's a difference." He said and took a drink of his beer.
"That profile you've got Ash looking for?" She said it before she could stop herself. She been pondering it since she overheard Sam ask Ash to look into and it finally hit her where she'd known it from. "Your mom died the same way, a fire in Sam's nursery. Why are you looking for someone else the same thing happened to?"
"Look, Rachel, you're the one that told me that this is something that me and my family alone need to take care of. Remember?" He asked.
She remembered. The morning after they'd first spent the night together he'd asked her to join the hunt with him, Sam and their father. She'd told him no because it was too personal to them and that she'd only get in the way.
"I know but you're a man down and I could help." She said.
"I'm sure you could. But you were right, we've got to handle this one ourselves." She sensed there was more to it than that but she remained silent and he continued. "Besides, if I ran off with you I think your mother might kill me."
Rachel glanced behind her and saw her mother cleaning some glasses behind the bar and sending a determined look in their direction. Dean smiled nervously at her.
"You're afraid of my mother?" Rachel asked him.
"I think so." He said still smiling.
Just then Sam came rushing up behind her and spoke to his brother in a rushed tone.
"We have a match. We've gotta go." Sam breathed.
"All right." Dean said rising. He looked at her the way she was used to just then as he pulled on his jacket.
"I'll see you Rach." He said quietly.
"Be careful, ok?" She said in a hushed tone of her own.
Their eyes locked for another moment and then he was heading out the door. She sat there and listened over the chorus of REO's ballad as the Impala gunned to life and then faded as Dean drove it away.
She found that for more reasons than her just being restless and wanting out of servitude in this bar that she was in that car with him.
Dean couldn't get the song out of his head. Her face was all he could see in his brain as he began to hum the melody at first. The more he sang the more he realized that she was now connected to that song in his head.
The thought brought a comforting feeling to him and the louder he sang it the more it enveloped him. Before he knew it he was singing the song under his breath and it filled him.
He had no notion that he'd gotten so into it that by the chorus he was all but belting it out and that his brother was staring at him like he'd gone nuts.
"And even as I wander, I'm keeping you in sight
You're a candle in the window on a cold dark winter night
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might..."
"You're kidding, right?" Sam asked, breaking him out of his fog.
Dean realized what had just happened and made a small excuse to Sam. What the Hell was happening to him?