Yoghurt
Author Notes: I can't believe I'm going to do this, I really can't. I mean, what with working incessantly hard at The Many Deaths of Cyclops aka Scott Summers (i.e. I do the first thing that comes into my head) and that idea for a X-fic based on Beauty and the Beast (if you really know your X-Men, you might be able to see two puns in that already). Anyway, with the other stuff, why add this one? I'll tell you why.
It's damn funny.
Just as a warning, if you have a strong dislike to any of the following, I suggest you leave now: suggested dodgy-ness, threesomes involving Kurt, Logan and Scott, or Müller Light. Or using Wolverine-from-the-movie and Scott-Kurt-and-everyone-else-from-Evolution. Which is more or less what I'm doing, though you can't really tell.
And any German I use will be. well, German. I learnt it all in my German lessons when I bothered to listen. It might be wrong, feel free to correct me if you know better than me. I do have a dictionary; I'm using that to help. Oooooh, "mystique" in German is "geheimnisvolle". Interesting.
So, anyone who has stayed (probably just Kayleigh, whose idea it really was), here it is. Sort of. Not too dodgy, I hope.
Um. where to start? Scott, perhaps.
Scott wandered as if he was wandering aimlessly towards the bathroom. The truth was, he wasn't wandering aimlessly, because he did have an aim, and that was to fill the Jacuzzi with yoghurt. Now that he'd heard that some religions purified things (flagpoles, for instance) with yoghurt, he wanted to see what would happen, if he, say, had a bath in it.
"Scott, mein freund!" called a German voice, making Scott jump. "Relax! It's only me! Und I brought the Müller Light!"
"Oh, thank goodness," Scott said, relieved. "I thought you were Jean." Scott wasn't sure, but he didn't think Jean would approve of his yoghurt- himself-Kurt-and-Logan-in-the-Jacuzzi idea. So the best idea was of course, not to let her know about it.
"Do I look like Jean?" Kurt asked.
"Er, no, not really," Scott admitted.
"Look," Kurt changed the subject quickly, "Here's the yoghurt!" He gestured to the little trolley he'd been pulling along behind him. On it was about fifty pots of yoghurt.
"Kurt, are you sure that'll be enough? It's quite a big Jacuzzi," Scott said doubtfully.
"Ach, das ist nicht alles!" Kurt said. "The rest is in the X-Van."
"Exactly how much did you buy?" Scott asked hesitantly, almost afraid to ask.
"The X-Van is completely full," Kurt admitted. "The Professor couldn't understand why I wanted so much."
"What did you tell him?" Scott was ready to back out of the idea. It was more trouble than it was worth.
"I said, 'ach, Professor, ich esse gern mein yoghurt!'"
"Oh, right." Scott had no idea what that meant, but so long as the Professor didn't want to know what they planned to do with it. "Where's Logan?"
"Logan ist..." Kurt shrugged. "He ist bringing the yoghurt."
"Guys?" called a voice. Kurt and Scott jumped in unison. "Are you guys up ta summat?"
"Uh oh," mumbled Scott. "Uh, hi Rogue. No, we were just standing here, um."
"Waiting for Logan," Kurt said helpfully. He gave a yelp as Scott grabbed his tail and pulled. Hard. "I mean, uh... we are just waiting for Logan to bring us yoghu-AUUUUA, Scott!"
"Weird," said Rogue over her shoulder as she walked away.
"Mein Schwanz tut weh," Kurt moaned quietly. He glared at Scott and clutched his Schwanz in his hands.
In case that sounded dodgy, Schwanz is most certainly German for "tail".
"Where is he?" Scott asked, mostly to himself, about Logan.
"Here," said Logan from behind him. "I jus' had to drag hundreds of pots of yoghurt up three flights of stairs."
"Well, come ON then!" Kurt said excitedly, heading in the direction of the room containing the Jacuzzi. "Let's PARTY!"
Author Notes: I can't believe I'm going to do this, I really can't. I mean, what with working incessantly hard at The Many Deaths of Cyclops aka Scott Summers (i.e. I do the first thing that comes into my head) and that idea for a X-fic based on Beauty and the Beast (if you really know your X-Men, you might be able to see two puns in that already). Anyway, with the other stuff, why add this one? I'll tell you why.
It's damn funny.
Just as a warning, if you have a strong dislike to any of the following, I suggest you leave now: suggested dodgy-ness, threesomes involving Kurt, Logan and Scott, or Müller Light. Or using Wolverine-from-the-movie and Scott-Kurt-and-everyone-else-from-Evolution. Which is more or less what I'm doing, though you can't really tell.
And any German I use will be. well, German. I learnt it all in my German lessons when I bothered to listen. It might be wrong, feel free to correct me if you know better than me. I do have a dictionary; I'm using that to help. Oooooh, "mystique" in German is "geheimnisvolle". Interesting.
So, anyone who has stayed (probably just Kayleigh, whose idea it really was), here it is. Sort of. Not too dodgy, I hope.
Um. where to start? Scott, perhaps.
Scott wandered as if he was wandering aimlessly towards the bathroom. The truth was, he wasn't wandering aimlessly, because he did have an aim, and that was to fill the Jacuzzi with yoghurt. Now that he'd heard that some religions purified things (flagpoles, for instance) with yoghurt, he wanted to see what would happen, if he, say, had a bath in it.
"Scott, mein freund!" called a German voice, making Scott jump. "Relax! It's only me! Und I brought the Müller Light!"
"Oh, thank goodness," Scott said, relieved. "I thought you were Jean." Scott wasn't sure, but he didn't think Jean would approve of his yoghurt- himself-Kurt-and-Logan-in-the-Jacuzzi idea. So the best idea was of course, not to let her know about it.
"Do I look like Jean?" Kurt asked.
"Er, no, not really," Scott admitted.
"Look," Kurt changed the subject quickly, "Here's the yoghurt!" He gestured to the little trolley he'd been pulling along behind him. On it was about fifty pots of yoghurt.
"Kurt, are you sure that'll be enough? It's quite a big Jacuzzi," Scott said doubtfully.
"Ach, das ist nicht alles!" Kurt said. "The rest is in the X-Van."
"Exactly how much did you buy?" Scott asked hesitantly, almost afraid to ask.
"The X-Van is completely full," Kurt admitted. "The Professor couldn't understand why I wanted so much."
"What did you tell him?" Scott was ready to back out of the idea. It was more trouble than it was worth.
"I said, 'ach, Professor, ich esse gern mein yoghurt!'"
"Oh, right." Scott had no idea what that meant, but so long as the Professor didn't want to know what they planned to do with it. "Where's Logan?"
"Logan ist..." Kurt shrugged. "He ist bringing the yoghurt."
"Guys?" called a voice. Kurt and Scott jumped in unison. "Are you guys up ta summat?"
"Uh oh," mumbled Scott. "Uh, hi Rogue. No, we were just standing here, um."
"Waiting for Logan," Kurt said helpfully. He gave a yelp as Scott grabbed his tail and pulled. Hard. "I mean, uh... we are just waiting for Logan to bring us yoghu-AUUUUA, Scott!"
"Weird," said Rogue over her shoulder as she walked away.
"Mein Schwanz tut weh," Kurt moaned quietly. He glared at Scott and clutched his Schwanz in his hands.
In case that sounded dodgy, Schwanz is most certainly German for "tail".
"Where is he?" Scott asked, mostly to himself, about Logan.
"Here," said Logan from behind him. "I jus' had to drag hundreds of pots of yoghurt up three flights of stairs."
"Well, come ON then!" Kurt said excitedly, heading in the direction of the room containing the Jacuzzi. "Let's PARTY!"