I don't own Hokuto No Ken. Nor the characters. Only this silly and pointless storyline. Enjoy!
VROOM! VROOM!
A large motorcycle pulled up to the gates of Yuda's towering castle. Attached to the back of the motorcycle was an elaborate throne carrying Souther, the self-proclaimed Holy Emperor.
"We're here, O Holy Emperor sir," the driver said. He parked the vehicle just outside the gates of the castle along with an entourage of escort vehicles.
"Huh, whu?" Souther mumbled, just waking up from his long journey. "Very well. Stay here with the guards while I do business with the master of this castle. The rest of you follow me."
"Aye, sir!"
On cue the gates were opened. Souther and his personal servants walked into the courtyard where they were met by Dagar, Yuda's field officer, and a group of beautiful women in jaw-dropping designer dresses.
"Welcome Master Souther," Dagar greeted. "It is so kind of you to accept Lord Yuda's invitation and grace us today with your presence. I have to say though. My Lord is a little upset with you. He was expecting you at the meeting an hour ago."
"Hmph!" Souther sneered, not seeming to give a crap. "The Holy Emperor goes by his own schedule, no one else's. He should be grateful I'm even agreeing to see him in the first place."
"But of course, Holy Emperor. Now if you would follow me. Right this way please."
They arrived at the royal throne room where Yuda and his guests were waiting. Seated around a large oval-shaped table with Yuda were Shin, Mr. Heart, and Jagi.
"You're finally here Souther!" Yuda cheerfully announced, upon noticing Souther and his men.
"That's Holy Emperor Souther," Souther coldy replied.
"Oh come on now. We go way back you and I. I think the need for formalities and titles shouldn't apply to us. We're practically brothers, wouldn't you say?"
"Whatever. Let's just start already."
"Ha ha! Well said. There is a seat right here next to me with your name on it."
"Great . . ."
Souther trudged over to the table and sat next to Yuda. His servants followed close behind, each one carrying a large box. They placed the boxes a few yards away from the table. Aside from Souther's boxes were many crates and barrels that seemed to be from the other guests.
"Ah! Are those your offerings for today's festivities?" Yuda asked.
"Yeah."
"Oh, how delightful. Its seems that you wasted no expense in your contributions. Many thanks to the kind heart of the Great Holy Emperor."
"Can you just tell me why you gathered all of us here?" an exasperated Souther demanded. "The sooner you explain to us what kind of stunt you're trying to pull, the sooner I can leave and go home!"
"Fine, fine. If you insist. Looks like somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. Heh heh heh."
"You piece of shit," Souther was just barely able to restrain himself from beating the snot out of Yuda.
"Ahem! Hello and welcome!" Yuda finally commenced. "I understand you all have a lot on your plates, what with all this conquering and empire building and such. So allow me to express my deepest appreciation for sparing your valuable time for my sake: Yuda, the Star of Enchantment. As you all may know there has long been tension between us Nanto Stars, the chosen successors of Nanto Seiken. But if we are ever to defeat Hokuto Shinken and end the 1800 year period of dominance it has had over all the martial arts of the world; then we, the warriors of Nanto, the chosen stars, must unite together! And I thought what better way to strengthen our sacred bond than bringing us all together for the first ever Nanto Seiken . . . POKER NIGHT!"
Souther was dumfounded. "What the fu-"
"Fun!" Shin exclaimed. "That sounds like so much fun! It's hard to find time for a good game of cards these days. What do you think Mr. Heart?"
"I too share your excitement Lord Shin," Mr. Heart answered.
"Very good!" Yuda said. "I see everyone here is in the spirit of healthy competition. Let us go over the rules then, shall we? The game we will play is No-Limit Texas Hold 'em. The stockpile of boxes to my right contains an assortment of valuable goods contributed by each player. Since money has no use in this era, I see a majority of your offerings include food, weapons, jewelry, and fuel: all precious commodities in the time we're living in. This will make up the total prize pot. Each player will be given 300 poker chips to start off with. This game does allow re-buys. So if you run out of chips, you will be billed additional merchandise for next week's meeting. At the end of the game, the player with the most chips will be awarded three quarters of the prize pot, while the player with the second most will be receive the rest. Any questions? No? Good. Let us begin!"
"You have got to be kidding me," Souther grumbled under his breath. "Am I really going to waste my night playing poker with these imbeciles? Huh, no bother. The spoils that will go to the winner do make it worth my time. This will be the perfect opportunity to show these fools the superiority of the Holy Emperor. After all, I always beat those child servants of mine at Go Fish. After tonight, the power of the Holy Emperor will only be that much greater. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!"
"Hey buddy, are you okay?" asked the person next to Souther. "You're not talking to yourself are you? Cuz that's kinda weird."
"What?! How dare you talk to the Holy-" Souther was startled when he turned around and saw who he was talking to. "Jagi?! What the hell are you doing here anyways? You're Hokuto. You shouldn't even be here!"
"Relax, Souther 'ole buddy. Shin agreed to bring me along. Yuria wouldn't be his girl if I hadn't convinced him to take her for himself. So he kinda owed me one. Besides, I could care less about all this Nanto bonding crap. I'm just here to get drunk, play some cards, and try to score with one of Yuda's chicks. Cuz you and me both know they haven't been getting' it from him."
"Hmm. You got a point there."
"I see everyone is now settled in and ready to play," Yuda declared. "And without any further ado I Yuda, the Star of Enchantment, hereby proclaim the first ever Nanto Poker Night officially-
"Oh my!" giggled a female voice from the women's dressing room, which was adjacent to the Yuda's throne. "No, not that spot! Oh you're so naughty. Hehehehe!"
"Don't act like you don't want it there," a man's voice laughed along.
"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!" Yuda shrieked. He stormed up the stairs to his throne and marched to the women's dressing room. Curious as well, Souther and the others followed close behind. Yuda kicked down the door and was met with a disturbing sight: Juza and one of his most beautiful girls on a bed engaging in some "playful activities."
"Juza?! Stacy?! Ugh! How horrible!" Yuda turned away in disgust. "At least cover yourselves with a blanket for God's sake!" Upon catching up to Yuda and seeing the sight for themselves, the others turned their heads as well. Only Jagi was left in a wide-eyed shock.
"Whoa, I didn't even know that was possible," he said in amazement.
"Sorry I'm late," Juza calmly chuckled. "I was on my way to meet up and play poker with you guys. But I was sidetracked by Stacy here. She said she needed help with something. And given my weakness for gorgeous women, I kindly obliged."
"So you felt the only way to help her was to use your . . . ugh!" Yuda grimaced. "If it weren't for the unrivaled power of your fist, I would have had you killed in an instant. But seeing that I am in a jovial mood tonight, the last thing I want is for a fight to break out. So I will forgive your transgression this one time, but don't let me catch you bedding one of my women again. They are mine!"
"Yea, yea. Calm your horses Yuda. I'm ready to roll. You know what they say: when Nanto struggles, Hokuto appears. Well I got another one for you: when there's fun to be had, Juza the cloud is sure to follow. Let's play some poker be-yotch!" Juza kissed Stacy on the forehead and jumped out of the bed to meet with the group. They immediately backed away as he approached them.
"Uhm, you might want to put on some clothes first," Mr. Heart pointed out.
"Oh. My bad. Ha ha ha ha ha ha!"
"This is gonna be a long night," Souther groaned, looking helplessly out a window towards the stars.
Hope you guys enjoyed the first chapter, and look forward to what lies ahead. Your support and feed back are what keeps me going.