DISCLAIMER: I do not own "The Simpsons" or "Kaeloo".
Kaeloo walked to the house where Mr. Cat and Stumpy lived as roommates and knocked on the door. Mr. Cat answered the door and grinned at her. "Well, Mr. Cat, I made it... despite your directions," quipped Kaeloo. "Hey, froggy! Come on in. I hope you're prepared for an unforgettable lunch!" Kaeloo sat on the couch as Mr. Cat walked into the kitchen. Mr. Cat realized that there was smoke coming from the oven, and he opened it to see that the roast beef was ruined. "Uh oh, looks like the roast is ruined! But what if... I were to get some fast food and disguise it as my own cooking? Delightfully devilish, Mr. Cat!" he said to himself. Just as he was about to sneak out of the window, Kaeloo walked into the kitchen and Mr. Cat stopped dead in his tracks.
[cue song]
Mr. Cat with his crazy explanations,
Kaeloo's gonna need her medication,
When she hears Mr. Cat's lame exaggerations,
There'll be trouble in town tonight!
[end of song]
"MR. CAT!" yelled Kaeloo, glaring at her friend. Mr. Cat desperately tried to think of an excuse to escape her wrath. "Tadpole! I was just, uh... just stretching my calves on the windowsill. Isometric exercise! Care to join me?" Kaeloo looked at the oven and noticed the smoke coming from it. "Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Mr. Cat?" she inquired. Mr. Cat continued to lie. "Uhh... no! That isn't smoke. It's steam. Steam from the steamed clams we're having! Mmm... steamed clams!" Kaeloo shrugged and headed back to the living room. Mr. Cat snuck out of the window to go to the McDaube across the street and buy some burgers.
[Later]
"I hope you're ready for mouthwatering hamburgers, froggy!" said Mr. Cat, serving his friend some of the burgers he had bought. "I thought we were having steamed clams," said Kaeloo, confused. Mr. Cat tried to cover it up. "I said steamed hams! That's what I call hamburgers!" "You call hamburgers "steamed hams"?" Kaeloo asked, skeptically. "Yes. It's a regional dialect!" "Uh-huh... uh, what region?" asked Kaeloo, still somewhat suspicious. "Uhh... upstate New York?" he offered. "Really? Well, I'm from Utica, and I've never heard anyone use the phrase "steamed hams"." "Oh, not in Utica, no. It's an Albany expression." "I see," said Kaeloo, who seemed to be buying the excuse. Unfortunately for Mr. Cat, it was far from over. "You know, these hamburgers are quite similar to the ones they have at McDaube," noted Kaeloo. "Oh no, they're patented Cat burgers. Old family recipe," lied Mr. Cat. "For steamed hams?" "Yes." Kaeloo wasn't finished asking questions. "Yeah, so you call them "steamed hams" despite the fact they are obviously grilled." Mr. Cat was about to reply when he smelled fire and realized what was happening. "Ye- hey- you know, the- one thing I should- excuse me for one second," he stuttered. "Of course," said Kaeloo, politely. Mr. Cat went into the kitchen and saw that it was on fire. He went back outside to the dining room. "Well, that was wonderful. A good time was had by all, I'm pooped," said Mr. Cat, yawning. "Yes, I should be- Good golly, what is happening in there!?" screamed Kaeloo, seeing the light from the fire through the kitchen door. "Aurora borealis?" suggested Mr. Cat. "Aurora borealis!? At this time of year, at this time of day, in this part of the country, localized entirely within your kitchen!?" she said, in disbelief. "Yes!" "May I see it?" asked Kaeloo, her curiosity piqued. "No," replied Mr. Cat, flatly."MR. CAT! THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE!" yelled Stumpy, from inside another room. "No, nutcracker—it's just the northern lights!" insisted his roommate. "Well, Mr. Cat, you are kind of weird, but I must say... you steam a good ham," said Kaeloo, and she left. "HELP! HELP!" yelled Stumpy from inside the burning house.