A meeting of misfits
A Kevin Smith fan fic
Written by Gabe Ricard
Disclaimer: I own nothing worth mentioning so don't sue.
I'm writing this as a favor to a friend who wanted someone to give Walt and Steve Dave a fan fic of their own. So, I took an idea I was actually saving for Jay and Silent Bob and applied it to this. So enjoy and let me know what you think.
Steve Dave peered around the corner and saw that no one was in sight. He had made it a special point of coming to school a few minutes early so he could get to class without running into Jason or any of his idiot friends. Actually, he could do without running into anyone in the school especially the kids in his third grade class but that was a little difficult. He knew exactly why no one liked him. They were jealous, he did better in the class than everyone, and they knew it. They wouldn't admit it. If asked, they'd probably talk about how mean he was to everyone in his grade or below. That's okay, it didn't bother him. But it began to when he rounded the corner and ran straight into the massive hands of Jason Myers.
"Look, there's the little fag now." Jason sneered and tightened his grip around the neck of Steve's Dungeons and Dragons shirt. Steve Dave looked around to Jason's two other friends. Two mindless cretins who Steve Dave didn't even know the names of. He knew is these kids were sixth graders who liked to pick on kids like him. "How you doin Stevie?"
"Let me go you damn dirty ape," replied Steve Dave quietly.
Jason spun him around and smashed him into a locker. Steve Dave grimaced at the impact. "I oughtta kick your ass just for saying that!"
"You should," snickered one of Jason's goons. "My dad was talking about your mom."
"So what?"
"He wants his five bucks back from last night." The goon cackled at what he must have thought was an incredibly funny joke and hit Steve Dave on the shoulder. Not as hard as he could but hard enough to make sure it hurt.
"You got any money on you shit for brains?"
"No."
Jason shoved Steve to the floor and reached down, grabbing his ankles and lifting him upside down. Shaking him until two ones and some change spilled out. "No money huh? And what the hells this? Pick it up Jeff." Jeff who happened to be the other lackey, picked up a comic book off the ground. The comic read X-Men. Jeff flipped through the comic and handed it to Jason who by now had dropped Steve Dave. Jason in turn flipped through the comic before dropping it on Steve Dave who had gotten a bloody nose from the short distance fall. "I can't believe you read this shit. Actually, I can believe it cause only little fruitcakes like you read this shit." Jason appeared as if he was about to continue but the bell ringing cut off whatever he had planned to say. He looked down at Steve Dave and smirked, "See you around." His friends gave Steve similar looks and headed off.
"Hey are you okay?" Steve Dave wiped the trickle of blood from his nose and rose to his feet to a see a rather chubby looking kid who looked about the same age as him. Steve Dave had no idea who it was.
"What do you care fat boy?" snapped Steve picking up his comic book and book bag and storming to his classroom shoving aside the new student as he did.
He made his way into the classroom and sat down at his desk. It was moved a few feet away from all the other desks, mostly because no one wanted to sit near him. Not even Jay and Robert who were almost as unpopular as he was. When he had sat down, Randal Graves approached his desk scowling as best an eight-year-old could manage. "What do you want?" asked Steve.
"Why'd you tell Ms. Hose that I was the one who painted all those swears on the bathroom wall?"
"Cause I knew you'd get in trouble. And it was funny."
"I should beat you-"
"Okay class settle down," barked Ms. Hose walking into the room. The new student followed behind and stood at the front of the class. "Before we get to the spelling test, I'd like you all to meet a new student. His names Walt Flannagan and he's from," she paused to think then looked down at Walt. "Where are you from again?"
"Well I-"
"It's not important," dismissed Ms. Hose. "Find a seat somewhere and sit down. I'll get you a math book because that's what you'll be starting on." Walt nodded and walked towards the rows of desks. Steve Dave hoped he wouldn't sit near him and glared when Walt sat down in front of him.
"Why are you sitting here?" asked Steve Dave annoyed.
"I don't really like sitting with a whole lot of people," replied Walt.
"Great."
"My names Walt. What's yours?" Steve Dave only stared at him. "Hey I saw you with a comic book. You like comics?" Steve continued to say nothing. "I love em. I have about 200 at home. The best one I have is Superman #21! My grandpa gave it to me before he died."
Steve Dave should have become interested right away and try to talk to him. He didn't even seem like that bad a person anyway but his defense was up and before he knew it he snapped, "Don't talk to me lard ass." Walt fell silent. Steve Dave immediately wished he could have taken back what he said but decided just as quickly he could and simply sat in his desk and looked angry for the duration of the morning.
"Peanut Butter again. What's wrong with her?" Steve Dave threw the sandwich in the garbage next to him and reached into his book bag pulling out a Snickers bar. He opened it and began eating it while he watched the other kids run around the playground and a few on the area that was supposed to be a basketball court-playing Hockey. He was interested in playing, but unless they didn't have enough players and he was sure they did, there was no way he would get to join in.
"I said, what do you got in the bag tubby?" came a sharp voice that was recognized by Steve instantly. Steve Dave sat up and peered behind the wall to see one of the few areas of the school that wasn't over run by other kids. Jason was holding onto Walt's shirt and had him pinned to the wall with his right hand men standing on each side. "You can hand it over and avoid an ass kicking or not and get the crap beat out of you."
"I-I-I"
"That must be retard for please kick my ass," Jason let go one hand and wound back. He liked to make them squirm a bit before he punched them.
"Hey! Jerk! Let go of him."
"That can't be…." Jason let go of Walt with the remaining hand and turned back to see Steve Dave standing before them. "You must have thought you were talking to someone else."
"I know who I'm talking to," replied Steve drawing on his knowledge of comic books in order to act tough. He knew it wasn't working at all. He had been more use to being a coward and didn't know why he was so adamant about helping this new kid out. Perhaps it was because he saw the chance at having a friend. Something his comics always couldn't give him.
"I'll tell you what, I'll give you five seconds to get the hell out of here."
"Can you count that high?"
"That's it," he glanced back to his friends. By now Walt had taken the opportunity to make his escape but Jason and his friends didn't give it a second thought. They were soon upon Steve Dave and were extracting mindless revenge. However, when Jason landed the first punch on Steve Dave he was greeted by a shrill, all to familiar voice of an elderly woman.
"Jason Myers!"
"Crap! It's Ms. Carlin." Miss Carlin was the music teacher but looked more like a stunt double for the evil principal from Matilda.
"I should not be surprised! You three are always picking on the younger kids and it's going to stop!" the woman swooped over all of them and somehow managed to grab all three of them by the ears and drag them away. A minute later, the bell rang loudly over the playground and everyone made their way to the school. Steve Dave was about to force himself up but instead saw Walt appear from behind the counter and reach down, helping Steve Dave up.
"You got Ms. Carlin?" asked Steve.
"Yeah…you really helped me out so I thought I'd uh…"
"Do the same?"
"Yeah."
"Come on we better go to class."
"Okay. Hey, do you wanna come over after school…check out my comic books I have about 500."
"Really? Wow…I only have about 140."
"That's okay…I can teach you the stuff you don't know and believe me I know everything."
End.
Personally, I think this story sucks and sucks hard. I only did it because of the request of a friend I do a story about Walt and Steve Dave and this was all I could come up with. Show no mercy, if you didn't like this as much as I did let me know.