A/N: ...I don't even know. D: (I had fun writing it though?)

01.

"Otonashi-san, Happy Valentine's Day!" Naoi announced in a loud voice one day, shifting from foot to foot excitedly, his face flushed in glee. Otonashi eyed him almost warily as Naoi ran to him and forced him into a chair. Seconds later, he ran back to the door and waved someone in, his hand flapping about, and Otonashi was momentarily filled with the irrational fear that his hand would snap off.

'Someone' turned out to be all of the other members of the SSS, dressed in pink and white frills, each with a small pink bow and quivers full of arrows with hearts taped to the tails.

Yuri, leading the group, looked as though she was going to go on a killing spree, very clearly not happy. The others walked into the room slowly, and Otonashi soon realized that they were all hypnotized into doing Naoi's will.

"Naoi," Yuri began, her voice dripping with anger, but Naoi merely snapped his fingers again, and she was silenced.

Naoi turned around and looked at Otonashi expectantly. Otonashi forced a smile and made a mental note to check if Naoi's sanity was still intact.

From behind, TK, spun around on his feet and tossed a heart-arrow at Otonashi's butt. "Easy come, easy go," he rambled in English, and Otonashi stared at him for a while before shaking his head.

02.

I LOVE YOU THIIIIIIIIIIIS MUCH, the card declared in bright, bold, cartoon letters. It was a very nice card, Otonashi thought. And the stickman was a very nice touch.

Otonashi returned the smile Naoi flashed him, and turned the card over to write his To-Do List out.

03.

"I thought I'd make chocolate this time," Naoi said, tying a pink apron around his waist and flicking his hair out of his eyes.

Hinata sighed and put the metal pan down from where he'd been staring at himself in the reflection. "And you want me to help why?"

"Because I haven't the slightest idea how to bake," Naoi deadpanned.

"…Well. This might take a while."

"Are they done yet?"

"You haven't been helping me make them at all, you idiot."

"But are they done yet?"

"I'm pouring the batter in, stupid. There's something called patience."

"…Uh, Hinata-san?"

"What?"

"Is that piece of machinery supposed to be spitting smoke out?"

"What, no—" Hinata paused. "Naoi, you brat, what did you do with the stove."

04.

"Prince Ayato galloped on his feisty steed Matsushita Go-dan through the forest and arrived at a tower. What in the seven hells—ow, damn it, Hinata, I'm trying to read. He dismounted Matsushita Go-dan and entered. Every stair looked as though it was about to crumble, but Prince Ayato scrambled up the few stories and walked until he found the right room." Takamatsu finished his lines, scratched the back of his head and passed the cue cards to Yui. "Who the hell wrote these lines?"

She cleared her throat and began to read. "Princess Otonashi was passed out, lying on the cold mattress—wait, if this is a thousand years later, then there should be dust on her, right? Oh, okay, I get it. So the princess was lying under all that dust—WAIT, why isn't the princess sneezing then?"

Naoi glared at Yui and pointed an accusing finger at her. "You peasant," he spat. "You ruined the whole play!"

"I did not, I'm just pointing out things you overlooked! See, then he kisses her—uh, him—and—"

"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" Naoi yelled, his eye twitching. "You imbeciles, you've ruined all of it!"

"Um," Princess Otonashi said from where he was lying down on a mattress, "can I get up now?"

"Happy Valentines Day?" Naoi said helpfully.

Otonashi sat up and presented him with a smile that looked like a grimace with teeth. His princess wig slipped off his head, and TK reached over to pick it up and dump a basket of confetti over his head. "Tastyy…candy!"

Otonashi sighed.

05.

"Otonashi-san, wasn't I brilliant today? I did the whole 'let's-make-a-plan' thing and discovered a new way to obtain tickets for lunch; aren't you proud of me?"

Otonashi pushed his reading glasses further up on his face and flipped a page of his book.

"Otonashi-san?"

In the background, Otonashi could hear Yuri and Noda bickering about a mistake he'd made during the plan—"You don't flip a girl's skirt up to get your ticket, stupid!" "But—" "You wait for the plan to start first, didn't you know that? Now go apologize!"

Matsushita Go-dan was sitting in the hallway with Takamatsu, probably watching him flaunt his muscles and scaring all the girls off.

"Otonashi-saaaan?"

He creased an eyebrow and flipped backwards. Did he skip a page?

"Otonashi Yuzuru-san."

Otonashi jumped at the feel of breath on his ear and he shook out of his reverie from the low whisper next to his head. His eyes shifted from his book to Naoi, who had managed to suddenly appear right in front of him without him noticing. Naoi leaned forward, and Otonashi shut his eyes.

Slowly, Naoi grasped the frame of his reading glasses with his teeth and gently pulled them away his face, his eyes locked on Otonashi the entire time.

"What?" Otonashi asked, his voice shaking but for a moment.

"You weren't answering me," Naoi replied solemnly, his gaze still firmly locked with his, Otonashi's glasses still dangling between his lips.

"O-oh," is what left Otonashi's lips. His breath was trapped in his throat.

Naoi smirked and quirked an eyebrow before pulling a ticket out of his pocket. "Lunch," he said. "My treat. Happy Valentine's Day."

Otonashi stared at the ticket in his outstretched hand. Mabo tofu. He chuckled. "No chocolate this year?" he asked, a light, cheery air in the tone of his voice as he took the ticket.

"Hinata-san told me to never show myself in the kitchen ever again. Apparently leaving me in there is like playing a game of Russian roulette. I have a nonexistent skill for cooking, he said."

As the two of them walked down to the school cafeteria, Otonashi thought that maybe this year's Valentine's Day was worth remembering, if only because this time he wasn't scarred into doing it.

Owari

2010.08.22