I actually really like Lissa, even if she was in the books for about two pages and was painted as a boyfriend stealer. She honestly represents all MR fangirls that are here for Fang. I don't blame you. This story's hella short and so are the chapters. The shortest chapter is literally 300 words. It's not 100% canon compliant, but I tried my best (which included rereading parts of the horrible entity that was SO-F).

This story takes place in SO-F technically, but since this is an AU I'm making all the characters including Max and Fang four years older, so they're joining school as seniors instead of eighth graders. This is because making a fourteen-year-old girl say and do the things she does in this story was a little too cringey for me.

"And I know you had sex with Elena on Homecoming night, you whore!"

Nathaniel gave me such a sour look I could see the premature frown lines forming on his forehead. Nothing some basic concealer couldn't fix, but I didn't give a fuck about him or his lines anymore.

I pushed past the lemmings that were gawking at our shouting match in the hallways, but not before giving them all a hairflip to show how unfazed I was. I entered the cafeteria, my high heels clacking on the cheap plastic tile, and when I found my BFF Chari in our usual spot at the back I made a beeline for her.

"Oh, honey," was the first thing Chari said, as I pulled out my compact mirror. Our epic shouting match had totally ruined my makeup. I began touching up my lipstick. Cherry red was my shade, because it perfectly matched my hair. "I heard what happened. Quite literally."

I didn't say anything. Chari put a piece of lettuce in her mouth, and I pulled out my own herb salad.

"So... you guys are officially over?"

In response, I stabbed my plastic fork into the spinach so hard that it broke in half. "Dick."

Chari nodded wisely. "In my experience, most boy problems start with them." Chari was that girl. The girl who had a different boy on her arm every other week. When she was finished with all the attractive-ish boys in our grade, she moved on to college men. It was no surprise how she did it, not with her blue eyes, honey-blonde hair, and those double D's didn't hurt either.

I stared across the lunchroom to where Nathaniel was sitting. Our high school was just like most other high schools on the planet. The all-star quarterback dating the hottest girl in school. Who happened to be me. I'm not being vain- it was a fact. Like gravity or Kate Spade heels being the new denim sandals. And no one dared dispute it, either, lest they wanted my bright red nails swiped across their face.

We were a pretty good couple, turning heads and taking names, until he decided to stick his dick where it didn't belong. The worst part was he thought he could hide it from me. Lissa Mulligan, the Gossip Cop of this shithole school. Who do you think found out first?

"What did I do wrong?" I kept staring at Nathaniel, who was laughing too loudly with his football buddies and doing a piss-poor job of pretending his ex-girlfriend wasn't staring daggers at him.

Chari flipped her hair. "Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Look at you. If he thought a ten like you wasn't good enough for him, he's a dick."

"Speaking of... it was crooked," I mused, picking at my salad.

Chari laughed. "Should've warned Elena. But really, honey. Most boy problems start with them, but they also end with them. What you need is a fresh start. Someone new."

I stared at her. Our school was a tiny brick box in the middle of nowhere. Where the hell was I supposed to find someone new that Chari hadn't already used? "Where the hell am I supposed to find someone new?"

She shrugged. "You never know. I heard there were three new kids coming to our grade today."

I grinned. I might've been a Gossip Cop, but Chari was the goddamn gossip queen. I hadn't heard anything about new kids. But I also had been rather preoccupied today with breaking up with my shithead boyfriend. "New kids?"

"Yeah, two guys and a girl. You never know... we have English with Cheatham next period. Maybe the Hot Guy Gods will bless you. If you squeeze your tampon hard enough, and whisper the words Prada sale in the mirror three times, it'll happen."

Just then, the bell rang for class. I pushed past Nathaniel, whose arm was now sneaking around the cheerleader slut Elena.

I dumped my mostly untouched salad in the trash and checked my hair. I mean, the odds that the new guys would be hot were minuscule. But it wouldn't hurt to turn the charm up, just in case.

I was going to win this breakup if it killed me.