Crack Collection:
In a world where Yukio and Rin are a thing, but Yukio is a pimp and Mephisto is a secret gangster... You have to expect ANYTHING. This is a crack story. Beware of birds that explode after eating tik-taks, mine-turtles and memes.
Donuts, Gone Wrong.
Amaimon stared blankly at the donuts in the plastic bag his brother was holding out. Mephisto was offering them, but Amaimon wasn't in the mood... Amaimon looked up,
"Do we really have to do kinky things with these donuts?" Amaimon= Not a smart-ass. Mephisto= Moron. The elder frowned, and rubbed his neck nervously,
"I never was going to do anything kinky with the donuts!" Amaimon shrugged and frowned,
"I thought the whole story was nothing but kinky food."
"Well, it is. But this is the crack version. Weird shit is about to happen." Mephisto looked around suspiciously, his face getting serious and shadowed. Amaimon straightened up,
"What kind of weird shit?" Mephisto turned, and barfed kittens.
"BWAAAH! This- Kind of weird shit." He paused as another kitten fell out of his mouth, the younger demon made a disgusted face,
"That's freakin' nasty shit, bro." Mephisto looked up, and froze.
"Not as nasty as that!" He shouted before barfing up more kittens and rainbows. Amaimon slowly turned around, where Neuhaus was wearing a pink speedo, and nothing else... This is Amaimon's face, 0.0 before also vomiting all over the floor.
"Hey guys! What's haaaaanging~!" He asked, as if wearing that weird speedo was his right! The two demons were slumped on the ground with big white eyes and white mouths with a string of drool hanging out... Neuhaus sweatdropped, "Does it look that good?" The two proceeded to puke again, disguising the sound of the Paladin coming in.
"Mephisto! *Hik* I can't ta~take this any~more! Take this spell off!" Angel walked in, his head WAY too big to be supported by the rest of his body. In his hand, he had a massive bottle of sake. Mephisto sat up and started laughing,
"No way! You look ridiculous!" He fell onto his back and laughed harder.
"Like you sho~should talk! You look like a jes~jester!" Angel shouted back, his body wobbling. "Now~ Fix my condition~tion!" Amaimon glanced between the two. Neuhaus suddenly interrupted,
"What if we all had a foursome?"
"..." There was dead silence. Then Amaimon started laughing,
"Like anyone would like speedo and big head!" Mephisto started laughing too. Angel and Neuhaus looked at each other, having a bad-ass moment of telepathy.
"You will fall off a cliff, in two weeks, and sharks will be seventy feet tall too." Angels suddenly said, totally drunk. Amaimon frowned, walking over and slapped his mouth. Neuhaus frowned,
"Don't hit people. It's mean! Friendship is magic! You aren't an asshole!" He said, his eyes huge and sparkly. Mepphy was a brony, but Amaimon wasn't. He proceeded to punch Igor, and sent him though the window. Angel turned,
"OMG! LOL! YOU JUST SENT HIM OUT THE WINDOW, AND HE WAS ALL LIKE 'BRB'! LMFAO!" Mephisto kicked Angel.
"Don't text-speak to me! Use full words for talking!"
"Don't threaten me! I can crush you with my head!" Angel shouted, Amaimon frowned,
"Is he still drunk? He isn't talking with slurred speech." Angel looked at Amaimon.
"Didn't you die? How are YOU here...?" Neuhaus struts into the room,
"Hey guys." Angel turned,
"Didn't you get thrown out a window? How ARE YOU here?" Mephisto grinned,
"Rin is also alive. And so's Satan and everyone." Shiro Fujimoto walks in.
"Hey Mepphy!" Angel flies around and grabbed Shiro by his shoulders, shaking him.
"Didn't you DIE? You got possessed by Satan AND stabbed yourself! How ARE YOU HERE?!" Shiro laughs, his eyes starting to glow, then he opens his mouth,
"IMMA FIRIN' MY LAZER! BAAAAAWWWWWHHHH!" Angel dies. (Yah! I hate that guy! *celebrates*) Shiro walks over to Mephisto and gives him a handshake,
"I couldn't die without fulfilling that 'promise'." Mepphy grins and looks at Amaimon, who's crying because Angel's huge head crushed the donuts.
"Hey, Amaimon, is Rin around?" Amaimon perked up instantly,
"Why?" Mephisto laughed,
"Nothing. I just needed to perk you up. I made a promise to Shiro that we'd have a threesome. Me, him and you." Amaimon blushed,
"A threesome! Really, are you kidding me?!" Shiro laughed,
"Guess he's not into it. But he will be!" Igor turns,
"I'll leave then. It was nice to see you Mr. Fujimoto. And you should wear a speedo sometime, it's really free feeling." Shiro laughed,
"Of course! I'll see you around Mr. Neuhaus!" Igor leaves, leaving the three alone with Angel's huge head, the donuts crushed under his head, and a huge hole in the window.
"So... How should we start this?" Shiro asks, turning to Mephisto. Mepphy grins, pulling out a pair of handcuffs and looks at Amaimon, who's holding the last donut.
"Like this." He walks over, and arrests Amaimon for 'feeling like he has the liberty to eat the last donut' and eats it with Shiro. Amaimon watches with tears,
"I hate you guys."