I've never been the kind of person to admit when I'm wrong. I enjoy being correct in every way possible. But currently, I'm admitting how wrong I truly was. I'm waiting on the bottom floor of this hotel. I figure that sooner or later, one of them has to come out. When that happens, I'll casually state that I'm staying here too and we can strike up a conversation and maybe they'll let me see him. I'm hoping the one I see is Frank. He's easy. Joe and Kevin are a little more difficult. They'll prod me and ask me a million questions. Frankie, he'll just smile and give me a hug. Then he'll ask me if I want to see him and I'll say yes. Done deal. Sadly enough, right now I see one of them. And it isn't one of the three I want.
Even though I'm half hiding from her, Denise walks up to me and of course she smiles really big and hugs me. "Miley! How are you?" I'm not sure if she approves of me being here or not, but either way I'm not too concerned. I'm just waiting for her next question.
"I'm doing great." I reply. I'm lying.
"Would you like to come up and see the boys? They'll be so happy to see you." She smiles and I really don't know how she smiles that big. "Well, Joe and Kevin anyway. Frankie is out with Paul."
She forgot someone. "What about Nick?" I ask as innocently as I possibly can.
"Oh, he's up there. But he may not want visitors. He's been sick all day. They had to cancel the concert tonight and everything."
"Oh. Well, that's okay." I act like I don't care. I lie again. "It'll be really nice to see Joe and Kevin." I give Denise my best 'I'm happy either way' look. I guess she bought it cause next thing I know she's grabbing my hand and taking me up to the room that the boys are staying in. Right now I'm glad that I got Denise. She was really easy. Not even a lot of questions. I smile in the sheer enjoyment that my plan worked.
"Oh, they'll be just as happy to see you Miley." She leaves me in front of a door. Am I supposed to knock? Is she just going to leave me here? Oh c'mon lady! But as my nerves are getting the best of me, Denise knocks loudly on the door and announces that company is here. I hear sounds of stuff being moved around and then an eager Joe opens up the door.
At first he gives me this weird look. But I smile really big, and then he does too. "Oh Miles! I've missed you so much!" He grabs me really quick and hugs me for a good long while. "What are you doing here? Are you staying here? Where's your mom? Did you bring your new dog? I really want to meet him!" See, that's why I really didn't want Joe. But just as I step in the doorway Kevin comes up and hugs me just like Joe did. I didn't have time to answer questions.
"Hey Miley." Kevin looks at me. "Nick might be sleeping, but I'll go check for you." My savior! I guess I should have hoped for Kevin the whole time. I guess since he's older now and married I don't really have to explain a lot to him. He just knows things I guess.
Joe closes the door and sits on the couch then motions for me to do the same. I sit and wait impatiently for Kevin to come back so I don't have to answer any of Joe's questions. "I think he's really missing you too." It kind of came out of nowhere, but I knew what it meant and I was extremely happy to hear it. I was also happy that Joe had let any questions he had go. I wasn't in the mood to be interrogated right now.
Kevin comes out of the door I really hope Nick is in. "Yeah, he's awake. I told him someone was here. I didn't say who, but he said you could come in."
"Thanks Kevin." I smile and hug him once more. I really miss not getting to be with these guys every day like I used to. I push open the door and he's sitting up on the bed with piles of blankets over him. He looks up and I wonder if I should continue into the room with that look he's giving me. But he smiles and coughs a little. "Hey Mi." His voice is very hoarse. I smile. "Hey Nicky."
"Come sit down next to me." I comply. I sit next to him and he's so hot that I can literally feel the heat coming off of him. "Aren't these blankets too much?" I ask, starting to pull them off. "No!" He stops me abruptly, pushing my hands away. "They're fine. Plus, I'm in my underwear." We both laugh at this.
A silence fills the room. A silence that I wish would just go away. "What're you doing here Miley?" His voice is too serious for my liking. Did he not want me here? "I just knew we were in the same place so I came to see you." I lied.
"You're lying." He's a little harder to get past than Denise. I sigh. "I guess, I just came to tell you…that I was wrong. And I wanted to apologize."
"Wrong about what?" He coughs some more. I put my fingers in his hair and smooth it out. "I missed this." He states it like it's completely normal. Like nothing is wrong between us.
"Me too." I look down. I already feel like crying. But for so many reasons other than why I should.
"What were you wrong about?" He asks again.
I look up and smile. He has our fingers intertwined and I stare at them for a while. "I was wrong about us. About you. Me. Him." I let his hand go. "I'm really sorry."
Instead of rubbing it in that I was wrong. That he had predicted what would happen with the boyfriend I had just currently broken up with. Instead of laughing at me, he takes my hand back. "Everyone is wrong sometimes, Miles. That's part of being human. Even if you don't enjoy it or it hurts."
"Yeah, I guess." I agree. "But I feel like this wrong can't be fixed now." My eyes are watering. I'm not even sure if he understands what I'm saying. Either way, the way he's looking at me is truly killing me.
"Yes it can." He sighs. "You know that no matter how wrong either one of us might be, we'll still be here for one another. I'm always here."
"Even though I messed up really bad this time?" Eventually the tears fall from my eyes.
He wipes the tears away. "Even this time." He smiles his goofy toothy grin at me and I can't help but laugh. I don't know what this means for us. But I'm really hoping that it means we're going to move in the right direction this time.
He wraps his arms around me and I snuggle closer. "I missed you so much." He whispers in my ear. "But I knew you'd be back. Cause that's who we are."
Even though what he's saying isn't completely true, it is on a certain level. I didn't think I'd be back this time. I thought I was done. But there was something about him that always made me come back. "I'm glad to be back." I whisper back to him.