-+-CHAPTER ONE: JEARLZ AND ALL CREATION-+-
Once, in the vast, empty void that was the universe, there was but Spaghetti. None know how or why the Spaghetti existed, but it probably involved Science. Spaghetti gave form to all – its sauce-less meatballs gave form to the earth and the stars, and the pasta itself gave life to all the creatures of the world. All that was left was the spirit of Spaghetti: Our Lord and Spaghett, Jearlz.
Before the Age of Man came the Age of Dinosaurs, a beautiful era populated by beautiful beings; beings which, angered by the repeated rejection from some dinosaur or something, were destroyed by Jearlz in a fit of rage. 'twas only after that great oblivion that Jearlz realised the error in his action and, to repent for his fucking genocide, he spreads word of the dinosaurs to all his prospective mates.
Eventually, as the Age of Man was coming to an end, Jearlz decided he must be born into this world to ready himself for the coming of the next Age: the Age of Muse, when all would come under His judgment. And lo! the stage was set for his spaghetti arrival.