"That's right! You're a second-rate copy of me! A mere replica!" Asch announced.
"No… That's, that's…" Luke struggled to find the right words until- "THAT IS IMPOSSIBLE!"
…wait, what?
"…alright." Asch didn't expect this kind of reaction, so he thought up another truth. "Van used to be Guy's best friend!"
"THAT IS IMPROBABLE!" Luke retaliated with his own words, not believing it.
Undeterred, Asch thought up a more obvious one. "Then how about this! Unbeknownst to everyone inclding her own parents and herself, Princess Natalia is actually adopted!"
"That is-" Luke was about to say until he realised something. Natalia was blonde while her parents were redheads, so how can two redheads give birth to a blonde? "…possible?"
"Oh, it gets better…" Asch continued, indicating that he has gotten carried away. "In the end, Van's downfall was a SONG!"
"Huh?" Both Luke and Tear couldn't believe what Asch was saying, despite it actually being true.
"And that's not all…" Asch had a grim look on his face as he said this.
Before looking at them with a hot-blooded expression and waving his hands at…everything. "This whole world, plot and setting are all just a part of this Worldwide-Famous Videogame called Tales of the Abyss! And we are in someone's 17th playthrough right now!"
"HUH!?" was all Luke and Tear could manage as end this fanfiction right there and then.
THE END!