My first crackfic on my account! This is only temporary on this website, I'll eventually switch to Ao3.
But anyway, enjoy!
It was raining. But it wasn't just rain, it was a thunderstorm. The perfect day to go golfing! Big open field, holding a metal stick, what could go wrong? What was Kokichi's logic anyway. No one wanted to go with him besides Kiibo. He said he "wanted to enjoy what humans do as a fun pastime." Besides that, Kokichi had somehow convinced Kiibo that metal objects in thunderstorms where beams that emitted charges into the sky that canceled out the electric shock of lightning.
An hour earlier, Miu had made a bet with Kokichi, claiming that there was no way, he could try to convince Kiibo that being out in the rain wasn't a hazard for him.
Moreover, it almost seemed like Kokichi had won the bet.
With Kokichi and Kiibo all packed up and ready to go, Kokichi called up the stairs in the dorm house where all the guys lived.
"Are you guys sure you don't want to come? I promise it'll be… a blast!"
Kaito looked over the railing on the second floor. The two boys locked eyes for a couple of seconds before Kaito raised his arm and threw a rubber duck at him.
Kokichi took the duck to the face and stared back up at Kaito.
". . . I'm guessing that's a yes?"
"HELL FUCKIN YEAH IT'S A YES."
Kaito jumped over the rail to join Kokichi and Kiibo.
"SHIT. I FORGOT MY ARM FLOATIES."
Kaito ran back up the stairs in search for his flower printed arm floaties.
While the two boys were waiting, they heard muffled screaming coming from upstairs. They both ran up the stairs to go investigate who was screaming.
Once they got to the top of the stairs, they could not believe their eyes. Because there were about 10 million fireflies.
Kaito was curled up in a ball on the floor crying.
"Well there goes our golfing trip," Kokichi mumbled as he knelt down and started poking Kaito.
Rantarou had come out of his room from all of the ruckus. He looked around at what was happening before quietly saying "my leftovers better still be in the fridge," and shut the door.
"I guess we should ask Gonta what's going on. Since he's the shsl bug catcher dude I'm sure he knows something," Kokichi suggested.
Leaving Kaito crying on the ground, they headed down the hall to Gonta's door and knocked.
"Gonta. It's me, Kokichi. Open up."
The door opened slowly and Kiibo and Kokichi walked in… only to find Gonta covered in blood, lying on his bed.
Kiibo rushed over to him. "Gonta-kun! No! Stay with us!" he yelled as he shook him by his shoulders.
Suddenly, Gonta opened his eyes in shock and confusion. "What you guys doing in my room?"
After Gonta had asked that, Korekiyo had come out from the bathroom with a mop in hand while saying, "Now the party don't start till I walk in."
Kiibo looked back and forth between Gonta and Korekiyo. "Wait… what's going on here?"
"Korekiyo-kun tell Gonta he should do ritual with him as bonding exercise!"
"Yes. Doing bonding exercises with friends is something all gentlemen do," Korekiyo said.
Kokichi butted in, "Listen, it's cool you're trying to 'bond' but we need you to catch the fireflies out in the hall."
Gonta's eye lit up. "There is bugs in hall?! Must be Sanic fast to go see fireflies!" He yelled as he grabbed his net and rushed out of his room.
The other three boys stood in silence until broken by Korekiyo talking the lyrics of "Single Ladies" by Beyoncé.
Kiibo and Kokichi slowly backed out of the room and into the hall, where they found Kaito, Gonta and Hoshi siting "crisscross-applesauce" on the floor eating McFlurries they got from King Burger.
"When did you guys get that?" Kokichi whined, "I want sooooome!"
"Then you should have been out here when we teleported to the Quiznos," Kaito said as he stuffed another spoonful of ice cream in his mouth.
Hoshi chuckled and muttered, "I don't even know which way the Quiznos is."
Kiibo sighed.
"Well," he said, "I guess we won't have enough time to go golfing anymore since it's… L8 o'clock? Okay who messed with my clock settings?"
And somewhere far away, on a golf course, Miu laughed.