This was a request from a lovely guest – I'm sorry it's short, but as I'm sure we all are, I'm pretty shaken up by the series finale. I promise I will get back to Meet the Hodgsons soon!
Set post s20e10
He watched as Luisa clung to her father.
Happiness. Joy. Love. Relief.
And he felt none of that.
Jack was filled with grief, hurt, anger, pain and multiple emotions he couldn't even begin to identify. Nikki was dead. She was dead and he'd promised her that he would save her. He promised that he would get her out of her tomb. He promised…
He stormed off, stealing Gustavo's car before returning to his equipment in their makeshift Lyell Centre. They should never have come here. Correction, he should never have come here. He should never have cared about Nikki – never loved her. If Jack hadn't allowed himself the weakness of loving her she'd be here, with him, breathing. Eva wouldn't have seen that emotion in his face, wouldn't have risked Nikki's life to manipulate Jack into breaking that scumbag out of prison.
That was another thing that he couldn't bare. He nearly killed 'The Vulture' himself, broke him out of prison just so his so-called friends could shoot him. Jack had aided a murder. In England he would be trailed and possibly convicted of manslaughter. What had he become?
She definitely would've run out of air by now.
He'd lost everything in one day. He'd lost her, he'd lost this fight, and he lost himself.
His knees buckled and he felt his body collapse to the ground by Eva's useless car. That bitch, he thought as he stared up at it.
It was silent in the world until Jack screamed 'NOOOOOOOOO. NOOOOOOOO, NIKKKIIIIIIIII'.
Every time he left England someone he loved died. Everytime. He mad a promise to himself that he would never leave England again. No, he thought, I've already broken that because I'm not going back until I find her body. I'm not going back, even if it means I die out here to. I promised her I'd find her before the blowflies got to her. I need to cremate her. I need to find her. Oh god, how do I find her?
Jack never cried. Never. Not even when Leo had died. But right now felt like a very good time to let everything go. He allowed himself the pain. He deserved it. She was dead. He would never see her smile at him…Nikki.
He fell unconscious.
When he awoke the sun was beginning to fall beyond the horizon and stars were starting to appear. He needed to phone Thomas…Clarissa…he needed to tell them what had happened.
He picked up his phone and his hands were shaking violently. His whole body convulsed. Why, Nikki? Why couldn't you just let me find you first? Why in even your last acts in life must you have put others – the lives of people you've never met – first? How could you be so, so – selfless?
"Jesus, Nikki." His head fell heavily into his hands. He was so tired, so scared and so lost…just how she must have felt before she…
Jack needed her. He needed her now more than ever before. Oh god did he need her.
He needed her to laugh with him. He needed her to cry with him. He needed her to mock him. Needed her to hold him as he….
"Was that supposed to be an introduction?" A tiny, quiet voice spoke.
He didn't even need to look up. Fast as the speed of light he got up, charged at her and swooped her into the air before she could catch her breath –
She was dirty, cold and…was that salt?
"Nikki please be real, please, please tell me you're real and that I'm not dreaming." He whimpered into her hair.
He placed her gently on the floor and cried into her matted mop of hair.
She said nothing.
Prizing his arms from around her she grabbed his hand, taking time to run her fingers over his gently, before bringing his arm up to rest his shaking hand above her heart.
She pressed his hand down until…
BOOM BOOM. BOOM BOOM. BOOM BOOM.
He broke as soon as he felt her heartbeat run through his hand to his own body.
"Nikki I'm sorry I failed, I broke my promise, I'm sorry I let you down, I sorry Eva saw through me, I wish I didn't care, I-"
She silenced him with the full force of her body as she collided with him. She gripped him so tightly she knew he would have purple marks where her arms had been later. She was still covered in so much dirt.
"I'm taking you home." Jack regained himself. "We're leaving. Now."
And this time she didn't argue with him.