Dear Diary

Yeah, as you might noticed I am not in the best of mood this days.. But about the wonders of love, or whatever they call it. I am in a so called 'dry spell' right now when it comes to two things. Guys and patience. And as these things appear to be quite important things and qualities in life, they do not seem occur in my life at the moment. And it's a bad because I hate the fact that I am single. 'cause I really suck at being a single lady and 'cause I don't have the patience to wait for love to come around..You see, I get impatience waiting for my spaghetti to cook, which takes about 7 minutes in total. It says a lot. BUT I find myself thinking about the times I actually dated and how much I hated that part too. Like I said, no patience. WHAT SO EVER. Really scary in fact. But as it becomes now I cannot force myself to stop the in some ways destructive, yet satisfied feeling I get.

But the thing is when I think love is knocking on my door, he actually just stopped by to say "Oh, but I see you more of a friend or a sister." Fan-fucking-tastic.. so I've given up on even saying' g'day "how ya doin'!" Freaking sick of having my heart broken and being "out there" tryin' my freakin' best not to be negative about it.

So I have one more thing to say tonight; "if you can read this I've given up on finding you. It's your turn to get of your lazy ass and find me; you know where I'm at."

I closed the book and looked out my window and down onto the boring, wet streets of this wonderful town; Forks. Yes I had moved here from sunny Phoenix to live with my dad for a while. And I was closing in on the big o'18, so this wasn't permanent. I'm going to move all the way down to California next year to attend UCLA, 'cause there was no way in hell i was staying here in this pathetic, little hell of a so called town. I had no friends here, I had no boyfriend here and I had to share a bathroom with my dad. And yeah, my dad is Chief of Police up here so everything pretty much in order in this house. But it was a typical bachelor pad- the big flatscreen, the overly comfy sofa and not much in the fridge to eat. But giving the fact that my mother had lasted all of 18 months up here before she pack up me and her things and left everything behind. My mother is.. No, my mother was. God, that still aches like a bitch. Well, my mother was a free spirit and Forks apparently couldn't contain her. I remember the time when we packed up everything into a mobile home and traveled all over the U.S. That was things she would do, so I never really settled in anywhere.

Phoenix was the place we stayed the longest before she died. I actually had a couple of friends down there, and they all followed me to airport. Kate, Victoria, Irena and Dimitri. They were all outcasts like me so they took me in, but I kept wondering why. 'Cause they were beautiful! I mean, stunningly gorgeous! They were a little pale and that's somewhat weird thinking about what kind of weather we have down here, but loving and caring people. And fiercely protective of each other and me, and of some reason everyone was a bit scared of them. Without any reason whatsoever... Well anyway, I missed them, a lot and more every day that went by.

The music floated thought out my room and the lyrics hit me

"...but the water's feelin' good this time. And I hate that I misread you boy, but I can't resist no-crossing signs when you're an open invitation to a heartache"

Oh so true... There was this boy, because there is always a boy and his name was Garret. But this one was something special, or at least I thought he was. Turned out that he was like every other one. With the cliché lines like " It's not you, it's me" or " I can't be with you right now".. GOD really? I'm giving up on boys.. at least until one willing comes along. As the song came to its end I realized that I had to get to school, or else, I was going to be late. Diving for the door and headfirst into the cozy truck my dad had gotten me as a homecoming gift. I really didn't think I would like it but as it turns out, I do like it. It is safe, old and totally something my dad would buy.

Forks high school, the name made me wants to hide in my car and wait until the day was over.

"Breath Bella, just breath." and as I took a deep breath and open my door and of course the heavens opened up and it was pouring down. I took on running with the rest of the students towards the building and found myself staring at a big sign with a lot of things written all over it.

"Oh God, no." I drawled. This was so not my day. AT ALL! Suddenly a little pixy with dark hair sticking out everywhere was standing next to me and was looking at the same board.

"Don't you just hate new schools?" I just raised an eyebrow as a question. "I can tell you are new here too, so why don't we gang up at go find the office?" She was looking at me with really expecting eyes so I just nodded.

"I'm Alice, Alice Cullen by the way. It is so nice to meet someone who hasn't grown up here" she chuckled and rolled her eyes..

"I'm Isabella Swan, but you can just call me Bella.. You just moved here?" I was shocked. There was someone, freely, that talked to me! And she was very pretty, almost like Kate. Damn. I was thinking about them again..

"Yeah, me and by adoptive siblings. We moved here from Alaska because Carlisle, I mean Dad, got a job here as a small town doctor here" So, she got siblings. I wonder if they were as attractive as her.

"There they are!" She exclaimed and took off sprinting towards the most beautiful people I've ever seen. They were even more beautiful than my old friends, if that was even humanly possible, With their pale faces, beautiful angled noses and chins and in designer outfits.

"Come on Bella! You got to meet my brothers and sister!" I was turning redder as I realized as I was ogling them, but suddenly one of them stared me right in the eyes. He was the gorgeous Adonis with beautiful hair and highly observant eyes. I quickly looked away and started to walk towards Alice and the introduction.

"This is Emmett and Rose" She was pointing to the huge teddy bear who was holding the statue blond in his arms, they were obviously together.

"And this is my greatest love; Jasper." He looked at her with loving eyes and she stepped into his open arms. "The silent, rude, guy over there" She pointed towards Adonis "...Is Edward"

He snorted. "Uhm, hello?" I strutted out. I was so out of place with these beautiful people " I am Isabella Swan, but you can call me Bella"

Edward's head popped up and he was no longer scowling at Alice but staring at me. "Sorry if I seem rude, but do you know Dimitri Volturi?" What?

"I know him. How do you know him?" I was gaping at him. How did he know Dimitri?

"We have a summerhouse next to his family in France. He was talking about a girl called Bella Swan this summer" I've heard about the summerhouse but never about the beautiful family that lived next door. I should call him when I get home.

"Do you know Kate and Irina too?" A strange look passed over their eyes, but they told me no.

They day passed by in a blur, mostly because of the Cullens. Not so much because of Edward, he was avoiding me but the others were really nice. Emmett was as I thought, a big teddy bear and Rose was underneath the protective, cold facade really nice and friendly. Jasper was Alice's complete opposite, but it worked and they were great. I might have found my new friends easy this time. But when we walked out into the rain (it would never stop) I saw which car they stopped by, and they were nothing like mine.

Rose and Emmett hopped into the biggest Jeep I've ever seen and Alice and Jasper got into a red Mercedes. Edward had a huge Volvo of some kind. These were expensive cars. Mine was just a rusting heap of scrap metal compared to them

"I would invite you to come over, but we're bust today. So what about tomorrow? Want to hang out then?" Alice yelled from her open window. As long as Edward is there. I thought, he looked straight at me and tilted his head curiously. Fuck, I didn't say it out loud did? The blushing became worse and Edward's eyes were a combination of black and gold when I looked back at him.

"Sure, I would love to come over tomorrow!" I yelled back and she bounced around in her car seat.

"Great, see you tomorrow! I smiled and waved and turned my eyes back to Edward, but he was nowhere to be seen. I noticed his car racing out the parking lot and down the , that was interesting but I couldn't help looking forward school tomorrow and there was a little extra bounce in my step on my way back to my car. I wonder why.

So this is my shot at a multi chapter :) If you love it, tell me. If you don't, tell me about why! ;)

Big hug to my beta "The name is..." :D