Adventures of L, Light'n, Larry
Episode 1: Deathgiving Day
By Wolflink93 and Renodin
Basinga Production
Myth Labs Production
Disclaimer: We don't own death note but we do own a roasted turkey.
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"I told you to dress up in you Mac & cheese costume for Thanksgiving!" Light's mother told him.
"Why are we celebrating Thanksgiving anyway? We're Japanese, not American!" Light told her.
"Because WERE STUPID!" His mom said.
"Well, screw you!" Light told her.
"GO buy some… holiday…food… bitch… I'M HUNGRY!" his mother commanded
"Fine mom!" Light said in a low pitched, retard voice. Light kicked down his door like an FBI agent (de ja vu) and frolicked down the street, screaming "DON'T JUDGE ME!" As he was walking an old lady wearing a dashiki and an afro waved her fist at Light and yelled "JAAAAAAM!" With a strong pulse in her voice. He went down to the street to Reasol's the grocery store.
Light walked into the store. He decided to buy candy instead of good food (WOO HOO! FATTY FOOD) he walked down the aisle, and saw a queer looking little boy. The boy had messy, blue hair, bags under his eyes, white shirt, blue jeans, and no shoes (no service!)
The boy was filling a sack with kaundey. Light pulled a stick out of nowhere and began to poke the boy. In slow motion, the boy dropped the sack. He put his hands in the shapes of guns. Then in slow motion, he made shooting noises and pointed the fingers at Light.
"Baaaaaaannnng!" The boy repeated in a monotone voice. "Ifffffffff IIIII waaaasss aaaa Kiiiirrraaaaa, yooooouuuu'd beeeee deeeaaad riiiggghhht noooowww." The boy said, still in slow motion.
"What's a Kira?" Light asked.
"I dunno, but it sounds pretty nasty." The boy told him.
"Hi, I'm Light. Who the hell are you?" Light asked.
"I'm L! Nice to meet you!" L said.
"Why are you named after a letter? Are you some form of freak?" Light asked.
"Don't make me bang you again!" L threatened. "I wanna be a detective when I grow up!" L said cheerfully.
"I want to possess some form of notebook that can kill anyone, and I will use it to kill bad guys, and you will hunt after me, but we will end up working together, and you'll eventually die, and I'll have a super model girlfriend who also can kill people and I'll live happily ever after." Light said. There was a moment of silence, until Light broke the quietness.
"If my grades are good enough." He added.
"You should turn that into an anime!" L suggested.
"Well, someone is probably recording this conversation right now, and they will make some crappy wanna be anime that is copying my story, and will have a suckey ending, and they will post it on Youtube." Light told L.
"Hey, I'm bored, and you made me drop all of my candy. So, what do you think we should do?" L asked.
"We need to go on some crazy adventure." Light suggested.
"You know, you are starting to get rather corny." L said.(I LIKE CORN)
"Well, I have to tell this story to people before Thanksgiving is over, and the people of fanfiction might hunt me down and kill me if I don't meet their freaking expectations and demands." Light told L.
"What is fanfiction L asked.
"Some place where nerds go to post their stupid little ideas about what they think would make a good story or expansion(like us!)to something they like, though it normally sucks so they had to come to this little crap hole for comfort.(hold me, mommy!)"Light informed L.
4 hours later…or about 10 minutes… not completely sure… don't pressure me!
I don't get paid enough to introduce time to these bakas who can't even tell time themselves! Man, I should have never watched these stupid animes that just degrate women and show events that could never actually happen in the real world. I'm becoming a Nerd! No! I won't allow it! Shikoshu! Shikoshu itu all to hell! NOOOO!
Light and L were in the dumpster behind Reasol's.
"Why are we here again?" L asked.
"You said and I quote 'I'm feeling dirty' after you walked by the magazine rack. So, I decided to add on to your emotions, and make you feel soooo dirty that even a shower could not help! Physically AND mentally! And maybe even Spiritually!" Light said.
"My soul burns!" L yelled, with his hands raised. "What kind of Thanksgiving special is this? IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH A HOLIDAY!" L yelled to the ceiling of the dumpster.
"I have an idea! Lets create a person to go on adventures with us!" Light said. L looked at him disgusted.
"I don't think that will work between two men. Besides, I don't know you enough to do that, so even if I was a woman… or you were… I think we would be going to fast… so back off!" L ordered.
"Ahhh, man!" Light said. (weren't expecting that, were ya? Neither were we, it just kinda… happened. Don't worry, we peed ourselves laughing too!)
"How about we imagine someone?" L suggested.
"But that won't be nearly as entertaining! Dang, we are going to lose 50 percent of our ratings now! People now don't want clean imaginary friends, they want sex, action… and politics! Damn it!" Light exclaimed.
"Umm, okay. I'll imagine his upper half, you imagine his bottom half!" L told him. They began squinting and sweating as they thought long and hard about creating their own little friend.
AND THE ADVENTURES OF L, LIGHT'N, LARRY WERE BORN!
Ahh, now for the Thanksgiving part…or Deathgiving, as we wanted to call it, for some stupid little pun, though really, there is no death involved in it… YET!
All of Light's relatives and L and their new 'friend', Larry, were all at the Holiday Rock outside to eat their dinner. The rock had been used by soooo many pilgrim prostitutes before them, and there were still stains there! L mistook them for liquid sugar, and he had some bad gas.
Light was filling a bowl with gravy so he could throw it at poor people(like us!)when Ryuk walked up behind him. Now, Light had never yet touched a Death Paper, so he could not see him. But, Light sensed the Shinigami, but he thought it was Larry.
"I sense something in the air." He said outloud. He dropped the bowl of gravy and got mad.
"Damn it, Larry!" He yelled. He tackled down the air and starting punching into the... nothingness. They all took a big photo with everyone, including Larry and Jessica Simpson. They would remember this photo….FOR-EV-ER! Ryuk was even in it! Though you couldn't tell, lousy Kodak!
HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!
I'm SURE YOU'RE MOM WILL BE HAPPY TO RECEIVE A RING ON THANKSGIVING AND A TURKEY ON THE REAL MOTHERSDAY!
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!
Oh, I don't want this to end!
Never gonna clean it up,
No matter how FILTHY IT GETS!
I like my cheese cold,
I like my cheese frozen,
CHEESE!
JaaAaAaAm!
Light's family sang this song all throughout the night. (the Cheese Jazz, invented by Renodin! And Wolflink93 came up with the cheese idea… baka shikoshu.)
BAKA-Japanese for idiot.
SHIKOSHU- Japanese for damn.
ITU- Japanese for it.
Renodin:Just post some reviews. And also don't forget to review our other story Death Paper.
Wolflink93:This is a side series to our Death Paper story. We write this one when we are temporarily bored with Death Paper. JAaAaAaAMMM!