Severus Snape sat in his classroom long after the class was dismissed. He had bloody Harry Potter in his class again with his bloody sparkling eyes that reminded him so much of Lily Evans.
Why did he have to be a coward and follow in Lord Voldemort's steps? He should have died like the rest of them; it would make his life so much easier. Snape was tired of being here trapped in his life with memories from his past. He would never fit in with this world and he was just a rag doll in their little experiments and wars. Every day he glimpses at Harry Potter he's reminded of his only love, Lily Evans. He would never refer to her as Lily Potter, that's a whole different story. Everyday he feels her presence as if she were going to pop up any moment of the day. She invades his dreams, his thoughts, his words, even his actions at times. He doesn't even know why he still sticks around; everyone he ever cared about was taken away. His stupid childish fears keep him back and alive, if only there was a way to get rid of them. Perhaps a potion or something but no, he knew that would be impossible and you can never get straight results. Sighing, he started to take out the essays on a very complicated truth potion to mark. The first essay was Hermione Granger, which was always a hard one to find imperfections but he did. He never let an essay go by him unless there was at least one mistake on it. Well, except for Draco of course. But, he had a special bond with him and his family that others knew not. He cared for Draco Malfoy as if Snape was his father.
He remembered the day he found out that Lily Evans was dead, the day he confronted his master about the biggest mistake he ever made.
"She could have been an asset to our side! You could have made her join, not just kill her on the spot!" A younger Severus Snape bellowed.
"You dare defy me and question my motives? Crucio!" Voldemort said in his icy voice. Snape let out a hollow scream that could pierce the hearts of even the dead. Falling down to his knees, he looked up at Voldemort with anger etched into his eyes. The curse was lifted off of him. "Now, don't let your petty love get in the way of our success. Love is a worthless emotion, you know that Snape, or do I have to teach you that little lesson again?"
He was quiet for a few moments to regain his energy. Standing up Snape responded, "The only reason I joined you was because you promised the life of Lily Evans would be kept alive." He couldn't believe that Voldemort went back on a promise, he was only starting to learn of this man but he knew that he wouldn't be able to trust him anymore. He also knew that he would strive to get revenge, but not yet. That would be foolish. Good thing he had already mastered Occlumency.
"Snape, Snape, Snape. I will give you one chance only. Either learn how to behave as a faithful follower or follow the path of those foolish Gryffindors, think quick." Voldemort's piercing red eyes shone into Snape's, obviously trying to get into his mind. It was a futile attempt for Snape was much better at it than him and he knew that Voldemort would never admit to not being able to do something.
"I will be forever in your service, my lord. Please forgive me for my foolish accusations for I was caught up in the moment." Bowing his head down, he knew exactly what he was doing. He would suggest a plan to work as a professor at Hogwarts, then be a triple, quadruple agent. But ultimately he would be working in order to get revenge on Lily Evan's killer.
He still feels the pain of when he heard the news every day. Every day his heart aches for his lost love. It might have lessoned if she had not been with that Potter boy. He was a menace to society and didn't deserve her. His son was an exact reflection of his dear old father which was a bother.
He was always there for her through thick and thin, as she was for him. He remembered this one moment he shared with her during a summer at their houses. Back when they still talked, back when houses didn't matter, their friendship still prevailed and nothing got in the way.
'It was a bright sunny day, the birds were whistling, there was a calm breeze swiftly going through the trees. To a non observer you would say it was the perfect day for anything, happiness would shine everywhere. Well, you would be completely wrong. Sitting against an oak tree was none other than Lily Evans. The person sitting beside her you would have never guessed. It was her neighbor, Slytherin friend, Severus Snape. Lily seemed to be crying, saying some incoherent words. Snape could hear though, he would always listen for her.
"I'll never be good enough for anything. I almost didn't pass History of Magic!" Tears were streaming down her face as she leaned into Snape for comfort.
"Lily, you are the brightest, beautiful, and talented person I have ever met. I know you will get through next year with flying marks. It was just one class and that professor probably won't last long anyways. Trust me, if anyone can pass that class it's you." Taking his thumb, he gently wiped away her tears. "Trust me."
"I do trust you Snape it's just…"
"No. Trust me, you will pass next year, you got an acceptable this year but next year I know, you will exceed expectations."
"How can you be so sure?" Her tears started to slowly fade away. She looked up at Severus, looking deep into his eyes, moving back a bit.
"Because I know you." With a huge grin plastered on Lily's face, she re-jumped into his arms, hugging him senseless. He always knew how to make her feel better. They then both stood up and he took his hand in hers. Squeezing it slightly, they departed their different ways for it was past nightfall.
She always captivated Snape with her eyes, which were the one thing he loved most about her. In his eyes, there was nothing wrong with her; she was perfect in each and every way. She still captivated him of course but he could hardly remember her now. It had been so many years that he still needed to re-view his memories to even picture her again. He was bound by the life she left behind, the moment she was killed his life was set. Even when she was alive everything that happened with him revolves around and for her. Standing up, he briskly walked to his fireplace. Throwing some floo powder in there, he stepped in. Speaking clearly he declared the location for him to go would be his house. Yes, Severus Snape actually lived in a house like a normal person. Noticing that the time was almost at midnight he quickly got ready for bed. Tomorrow was Saturday so he didn't even have to be at Hogwarts. It held too many memories for him anyways. He also had a meeting to attend to tomorrow morning. It was strange that this meeting was for tomorrow morning but he would still do what Voldemort asked. Laying his head down on his pillow he drifted to sleep, and into a dream.
He was running in a forest. He couldn't think at all but he felt scare and anxious. He finally got to a house and stood in front of it. All of a sudden he heard the more angelica laugh coming from behind him. Quickly turning he saw it was Lily Evans. They walked up to each other and proceeded to kiss for about ten seconds. She then pulled away and said, "I've missed you."
Before he got to say anything, or even stay longer he was pulled out of this dream, swirling in a black abyss. He now landed in a cell but it was if he was part of an audience. He saw himself standing there, screaming, "I saw her! Lily Evans is alive, I saw her! I saw her! I swear I did." It was obvious to even himself that this Snape had gone insane.
Once again he felt that pull feeling and got thrust into a black abyss.
Sitting up in bed, he jumped up. Taking out his wand, he transformed them into his Black Death Eater robes. He only had five minutes to get to that meeting. Turning briskly, he apparated and he landed in the Malfoy living room. This was where he was instructed to go.
Voldemort was standing there in front of the mantel place. It didn't matter how the room looked like, that wasn't the big picture. "Severus, this is going to be a private meeting between you and I, for it will only take a few seconds. I'm sorry it had to come down to this." Snape was curious now; he thought it was just a casual planning meeting. What could Lord Voldemort want privately with him? "But you are no use to me anymore." Not even getting to say a word, he blacked out. Before that he remembered seeing a green light and hearing the words, "Avada Kedavra." This is how he knew that he was dead. At least he could be with his one true love now.
He felt his body floating upwards, then he was in the same place, Malfoy manor. The only difference was that he was there alone and it was eerily quiet. Just then a sight he never thought to see again, Lily Evans gracefully walked in.
"Lily," he said under his breath in complete shock with longing.
"Hello, Severus. Before you ask, yes, you are in fact dead. This is just the limbo before you move on. They decided to send me down here to hear your decision." Her voice still sounded as sweet as ever.
"What choice? Are you leaving?" He responded, a bit unlike himself. But the one you love can make you act differently they say.
"A choice to either move on or you can return to your body to fulfill your purpose in helping out my son. I'm not allowed to say anything to sway your mind, but I beg you think about it first."
"Where are you going after this?" Would she be returning with him, or back to the after world?
"Well after you make your choice I will return to James."
The least he could do is help her. He had no life in the after life he knew. Sure he would be with Lily but not truly. He'd still be alone. "I'll go help your son. It's the least I can do." He could have helped save her but this is a way that he can repay her. That's what he thought in his mind any ways. With parting smiles, he felt his body or soul float back down, beneath the surface. He hadn't moved on yet, so he couldn't leave Lily again even if it was in the form of her son. He loved her no matter what and would do anything for her. He knew her well enough to know that this is what she wanted. Little did she knew, she swayed his mind in more ways than one.
A/N: I own nothing by J.K. Rowling. Also, this used to be a song-fic, but I cut out the lyrics and instead made it a one-shot so that it wasn't against the rules. x]