Yo! The Epitome of Eccentricity here, letting you know that this has nudity, and is not appropriate for ages under the M-rating warning. However, this is also making fun of all those lemon fics that seem to think that, even if you have a giant penis, it will still fit in any of a tight little virgin's holes with little to no pain.
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Hinata moaned loudly as her virgin boyfriend expertly massaged her luscious tits. Even as she thrashed about sexily in the throes of passion, she still wondered, 'How the hell is Naruto so good at this! He's only a virgin!' She then pushed the unwanted thought away, and decided to just deal with it. Once she had effectively cummed five times just by her breasts being fondled, she decided to return the favor. However, once she did so, she noticed his 9 inch cock that was 4 inches wide. "Naruto-kun," she started, "How the hell is that supposed to fit inside me?" the Hyuuga heiress finished her question with an odd stare, feeling not just a little worried that she might possibly be ripped in half by the elephant trunk in front of her, completely forgetting how shy she was supposed to be before any of this ever happened.
"Oh, don't worry, Hinata-chan! It should fit… This time," Naruto replied, mumbling the last part where Hinata could not hear him.
"Oh, ok. Since you the main character, it should work out just fine, all because the author said so!" Hinata responded cheerfully, unknowingly breaking the fourth wall.
So, Naruto went to put the penis of DOOM inside Hinata's snatch. Sadly, as he attempted to push his way in, his penis would not move inside! The Uzumaki scion looked down at his dick in horror. "No… NOOOOOO! Not again! This is the sixteenth girl this has happened to this month! Why did the Kyuubi have to make me so big!" As Naruto screamed his sexual frustration to the heavens, Hinata ran away screaming as the Jinchurriki of the Kyuubi's dick started to grow another inch, as in response to his anger. Somewhere, in the back of his head, a dark voice chuckled malevolently…
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So, there it is. The truth of what really should have happened in all of those unrealistic lemon fics. From yours truly… ~The Epitome of Eccentricity!