23: The Road to Total Drama Retro
Disclaimer: Do not own. Just a fan. Also any additional characters that may or may not make there way in this fic are the property of his or her owner famous or not and will be sent home with brownies and milk.
Pairings: Now why would I tell you that? :D Seriously though it's Canon and Fanon. I'm not messing around with the couples in THIS story. ;)
Rating: I'm saying PG. ;)
Timeline: This is the continuation of 23 Presents. TDA does NOT happen though references to it will be made more then likely.
Now that's set wish me a Happy Anniversary. As of December 2nd, 23 Presents is 1 year old now! :D
And…Onwards to the unknown!
Chapter One:
December 31st
Chris McClain adjusted his black suit and stared at himself critically in the mirror. After a moment he shot the object a pearly grin. "Perfection as always." Chris grinned happily before turning away from the mirror.
His smile immediately vanished as he noticed the numerous interns racing around the empty building. Each of his underlings was hard at work. A couple unrolled a large screen while others hooked up lights and placed everything from a giant eye to a window close by.
The host crossed his arms and scowled. "It's a simple montage! How long does it take to do one stinking montage?" One of the grunts opened his mouth, but Chris put up a hand. "I didn't think so. Now move move move!"
Tapping his foot impatiently, Chris watched as slowly but surely the needed items were placed. "It's about time!" Chris McClain complained stalking in front of empty screen. The lights vanished leaving the building in complete darkness.
With a final hair adjustment, Chris gave the order to start. Immediately the screen behind him lit up with a monochrome picture of space in the background. Opening his eyes he stared emotionlessly at the camera.
You unlock this door with the key of Chris
Beyond it is the road to another world
A world of sound, sight, and…
Campers risking their lives, lunch and dignity for 100 thousand big ones!
The monotone voice of the TDI host turned to excitement and the lights turned back on. Ignoring the black and white show behind him, the host walked onwards with the ever present cameras following him as he talked.
"And oh man did they lose it! Kiwi crashing, cliff diving, vomit handstands, butt bare riding, snake hugging, island curses, and did I mention the vomiting and loss of dignity? Oh man that was awesome!"
The host laughed in glee before continuing. "And that was Season ONE! Naturally we expected even more humiliation in the follow up special for Total Drama Island! This of course would make all of Owen's cheddar winning efforts absolutely worthless!"
"Unfortunately a certain SOMEONE decided to do something stupid leading to the special's dismissal. But…lucky for us camper guilt overcame the animosity at Christmas time leading to the totally wickedly awesome and Grammy nominated Christmas Special 23 PRESENTS!"
Chris stopped walking to gesture to a giant billboard of himself holding a Christmas present with the words Grammy nominated written proudly in gold off to the side with the black title placed below it.
"Ahhh…23 Presents. The feel good, utter angst, comedic, thrill ride and redemption story that cost zip to produce, got me a mondo paycheck and was nominated for a Grammy. Doesn't get any better then this!"
"Oh wait…it can! We also managed to trick all 22 campers into another season and we even have an obsessive fan along for the ride! Totally that girl logged in about 948 auditions in the Traveling Cams. OBSESSIVE! Anyway your probably wondering where all our heh heh campers are."
Ezekiel's House
Kitchen
5:55 p.m.
"I don't care what kind of strings you have to pull! I want an automatic guaranteed that-Hey! That's my new PDA you're holding you-" Courtney's words trailed off as she noticed the stern visage of Ezekiel's father holding the much desired device in one hand.
"5 minutes before you will be in bed and all lights will be off. While your host might think otherwise, I won't be having any guest on my watch doing something stupider then usual due to lack of sleep."
"5 minutes then PDA off…got it." Courtney smiled nervously accepting back her PDA.
The CIT keep the smile on her face until the homeschooler's father left the kitchen. "Bed at 6 in the evening? And on New Year's Eve? Even I think that's pushing it."
Courtney muttered to herself as she left as well heading directly towards her room her PDA glued to her ear.
"Now as I was saying Michael I absolutely refuse to be at a disadvantage and after what happened on Season 1 I feel that a little compensation is in order. Capeesh?"
Ezekiel's House
1st Guest Room
"Season 2 Season 2 Season 2 Season 2 Season 2 Season 2 Season-"
Gwen pressed the button on her IPod turning the music up loud enough to drown out Jasmine's song. Removing her signature outfit from her suitcase, she placed it aside and zipped up her bag. Similarly Bridgette and LeShawna who also wore their headsets did the same.
Jasmine on the other hand was too excited to do so and she rocked back and forth on her bed, her belongings still thrown throughout the room as she sung her mantra. "Season 2 y'all, Season 2 eh, Like Season 2 we're like wow! We're like really going on it!"
The new addition of bad accents to the annoying song did it and was easily heard even through the pounding music in their ears. Though LeShawna and Bridgette showed considerable restraint, the goth was close to losing it.
Gritting her teeth, Gwen fought to remain calm. Annoying or not, the off key creature WAS one of LeShawna's friends and attacking said friend might end up alienating the large sister.
"Attack and Alienate or Suck it up and Suffer?"
Lucky for her the mental question was answered when the floor started to thump ominously. Gwen instantly relaxed and shot Bridgette an evil smirk which the surfer returned when a very annoyed Eva appeared in their doorway dressed in an oversized team jersey.
Unaware of the danger, the beret wearing girl continued singing happily until she felt a firm hand pulling the collar of her night gown forward. Startled, the diva opened her eyes and recoiled slightly at the site of the resident unstable powerhouse.
"One more peep about Season 2 and you're leaving here in a body bag!" Eva growled out causing the drama queen to shiver in fright.
"Eva too much!" Bridgette yelped out earning a look of confusion from the strong woman.
"Break every bone in her body?"
"Too much!"
"Punch the living daylights out of her every time she obsesses about Season 2?"
At this last suggestion Gwen looked thoughtful. "Tempting." The goth said with a wicked grin earning a yelp of horror from Jasmine.
Bridgette shook her head. "What WE mean is Cody ranting to Harold and Noah about Star Voyagers vs. Star Fighters level threat."
"Oh." Eva said simply her brown eyes softening for a brief moment. Just as quickly they hardened again as she turned to face the would be camper.
One more word about Season 2 and that beret is mine. Now shut up and get you're over processed head into packing!"
Jasmine quickly nodded and the stronger female let go of her nightgown and left the room.
Traveling Cam
By the Old Shed
The curtain hiding the camera was abruptly flung open as Jasmine quickly entered only wearing her nightgown despite the cold weather. Shivering a bit, she addressed her public.
Jasmine-Okay that girl is whack. And an affront to all non athletic girls. Still lesson learned. You want to play the game you got to know how to play tough. And when it comes to…you know what… this sister's gonna be on top tomorrow! Just wait and see.
Static.
Ezekiel's House
Ezekiel's Room
"Annnnnd…Done!" Cody announced as he removed the IPod from his new laptop. "A little preparation goes a long way towards making an unpleasant trip more bearable." The techno geek commented handed the device to Justin who smiled.
"Hey thanks! My modeling agent said that listening to music while you sleep is supposed to be good for the pores."
"Maybe so, but you might want to keep it off for now. No telling what we're in for tomorrow." Cody commented absently plugging another camper IPod's into the computer port.
Justin rolled his eyes at the warning and then glanced into his mirror with a smile.
"For all we know it's another overnight camping trip. Chris just loves to mess around with our heads."
"At least there are no bears." Owen interjected happily from his bed.
With that innocent comment, Cody shivered audibly.
Traveling Cam
By the Old Shed
Cody grinned cockily at the camera, but the effect was ruined by the sound of his teeth chattering and his body shivering.
Cody-T-t-two m-m-minutes to S-S-S-ix so gotta m-m-make this q-q-q-uick. I…Hate…Bears. But I'm n-n-not letting t-t-that stop me. N-n-not me me me.
The Traveling Cam curtain is flung open by Eva who scowled. With one quick motion, she tossed the shivering ladies man over her shoulder. Turning, she shot the camera a deadly scowl.
Eva-Get one thing straight. I am NOT setting on the sidelines and I…WILL…WIN.
Static.
Ezekiel's House
Living Room
6:00 p.m.
"Man and I thought Chris had the wrecked schedule. Bed at 6 on NEW…YEAR'S…EVE." Duncan complained out loud in the dark room.
"Which means absolutely ZERO chance for a New Year's kiss with my hot surfer babe." Geoff whined from his air bed.
Duncan let out a snort. "Speak for yourself."
"Dude?! Seriously! You're going to sneak into that room? Heather is so going to blab to the Zeke man's dad. And not to mention Eva's in there."
The delinquent scoffed. "As if I care. Baldie blabs one word and she's the one in trouble with the old man, not me. And the gorilla's a pushover."
Across the living room, Katie and Sadie gasped out in horror. "Sadie oh my gosh did you hear what Duncan just said?"
"Oh my gosh! Eva like totally would kill him for that! Not to mention…Cody."
At that last statement, the infamous twins giggled in amusement. The computer savvy geek had gradually been having an effect on the fitness obsessed girl and slowly but surely the coldness started to fade.
However the slightest mention of anything considered "soft" in Eva's eyes or especially that she was going soft would earn immediate retaliation from the strong woman.
The trick was to maintain the delicate balance between compliment and insult. No easy task. At least for anyone not named Izzy, Cody or Ezekiel. Though the latter was shaky at best, and the slip ups common, he was begrudgingly allowed a little leeway.
As for Ezekiel himself, he let out a yawn as he reluctantly opened his eyes. Listening briefly to the arguing going on between the punk, the girl he liked and her best friend, he shook his head.
"Here we go a'gain eh."
With a click of the controller, Ezekiel's image was frozen on the screen. Turning away from the screen, Chris McClain focused his attention on the camera.
"Well enough about the kiddies! In the meantime since the campers are going beddy bye early thanks to Ezekiel's loving prairie parents, it has left moi with mucho uninterrupted camera time! So let's make things interesting!"
"As a ratings booster, we're going to give YOU the FAAAANS a chance to actually meet your favorite camper face to face. Well…maybe not you're actual fav-orite…and there is the obsessive fan to think about…"
"Anyway tons of restrictions apply and more then likely only a few of you might get the opportunity to meet with your favorite, not so favorite or just plain camper or wannabee, but hey! Snowball's chance in you know where is better then no chance at all! Ha Ha!"
"Just PM our executive producer and maaaybe she might allow a temporary cameo of you with your favorite camper, one of the other 21 freaks, or the wannabee. Keyword Temporary. As for any criticism, comments and otherwise click on a little green button located who knows where."
"And don't forget your NAME, what the heck you LOOK like, which one of our 22 nutcases do you LIKE and HATE most, Favorite COLOR and of course favorite FOOD, SWEET OR DRINK."
"Why all this info? Heck if I know! Oh and one more thing…you're NOT getting on the show as a possible contestant. This is called 23: The Road to TDR for a reason you know! Ha Ha!"
"We got 10 hours and counting until the start of this thing so grab a snack, take a nap and stay tuned for 23: THE ROAD TO TOTAL...DRAMA…RETRO!!!"
Executive Producer Imagi here! Just a reminder that I don't own The Twilight Zone and any possible cameos are requested by PM only. All other comments, questions and criticism are resolved simply by the clicking of a little green box that says review on it. :)
And off topic…how the heck do you work an IPOD?! I got an IPOD touch as an unexpected super early Xmas gift. Considering I didn't even know what it was when I got it…I could use a little help.
Coming Up Next…
The Competition takes off!