Context: Lexa in a couple scenes before this had came to Clarke with an offer. Relationships were deteriorating between Skaikru and the Coalition. Tension had been high for months and they were on the verge of refusing to cooperate anymore. At the same time, Azgeda was antagonizing and actively breaking away from the Coalition. Lexa did not want the Skaikru to side with Queen Nia and gave Clarke a proposal: a political marriage between herself and Clarke, and Skaikru join as the 13th clan. Skaikru would never be accepted as such without certain steps, and most Lexa could do on her own. However, the marriage would cement that, and she doesn't trust anyone other than Clarke. Clarke, on the other hand, is still in the midst of her anger and hatred of Lexa for the events of Mount Weather. This is the result of that.
Lexa took her spot at the highest point in the grand hall. Skaikru and her people all mingled below and she felt a happiness. The months that Clarke had been gone were rough and filled with high tensions. Seeing her the night before had brought up so many feelings she had thought gone. She still makes me weak, Lexa thought. The blonde sat amongst her friends and had a drink in her hand, sipping wildly from it. Though she did deserve to drink heavily, Lexa still did not agree with how Clarke had handled her emotions.
I only wish she would let go of her anger towards me. Clarke had concealed it well when they first saw each other again, but Lexa could tell it was there. Clarke's eyes betrayed her inner feelings and cut through Lexa like a sword slices paper. She had made sure every detail had been planned, gone through every possibility in her head, but nothing could have prepared her for the hidden fury within Clarke. The conversation went as expected, though it was the words left unsaid that gave her unease.
"Clarke seems to be enjoying herself," Indra commented as she stood off to the side.
"She does," Lexa replied. She watched the blonde laugh and could tell the alcohol was getting to her already. "Apparently she does not know how to pace herself." It had been a week since their reunion and Lexa still did not have an answer to the question she posed to Clarke. She did her best to give Clarke some space, but her patience was wearing thin. I allow her too much leniency, Lexa admitted to herself.
Her full attention was drawn when Clarke stood up and held up her glass, the girl wobbling slightly. "A toast!" Clarke exclaimed, a slight slur to her words. "To our great, fearless, honorable Commander of the twelve clans!" Clarke downed the rest of the glass and slammed it down on the table. "Without her, a flawless victory over the Mountain Men wouldn't be possible. Another drink!" Lexa watched Clarke reach for another glass and Bellamy grabbed her arm and whispered something in her ear. Clarke wrenched her arm away and took the cup anyways and stormed away from the table they sat at.
This has to stop. Lexa's people were already looking at her, waiting to see what she would do. Nothing Clarke had said was directly insulting, but they were all smart enough to understand the true intent behind them. "Indra, bring her to my private eating room," Lexa said, standing from the table and exiting through the door behind her seat.
She waited for several moments before Indra entered with an extremely unsteady Clarke. She is drunk, Lexa observed, disappointment filling her. "Leave us," she directed at Indra. The warrior nodded and exited the room, closing the door behind her. Once alone, Lexa addressed Clarke. "What are you doing, Clarke?" Lexa could barely hide the anger in her voice. She would not stand to be openly insulted by anyone, not even Clarke.
Clarke merely shrugged her shoulders. "I'm having fun," she slurred. She stumbled around the room picking up objects and letting them fall through her lazy grip as she moved about in a drunken daze. "People want me to be happy. Here I am," she said, clumsily bending down and waving her hand in a downward arc, nearly falling at the bottom of it. "Aren't you having fun, Commander?"
Lexa's patience wore thin and she snatched the cup from Clarke's hand and grabbed a nearby tankard of water and began to pour.
"Hey, that's mine!" Clarke whined as she looked at the spilled alcohol on the ground. "You like to take things." Lexa heard clothes shifting and turned around to see Clarke loosening the straps on her shirt.
"Clarke, what are you doing?" Lexa put the cup down as she reached to stop Clarke from further undoing her shirt. What has gotten into her? She honestly thought Clarke was pathetic at this moment in time, no matter how much she cared for the woman. There was no excuse to get drunk and act like a child.
"This is what you want, isn't it?" Clarke purred, spinning away from Lexa's hands. "Why else would you ask me to join you? My mom would have helped you," Clarke said, shoving her finger in Lexa's direction. "You just wanna use me again."
Lexa felt anger brewing inside her and could barely contain it. "I have never used you, Clarke. I care about you." She tried to remind herself that this wasn't really Clarke standing before her, but it did little to help the storm inside of her.
"I thought love was weakness, Commander," Clarke teased. "You used me to get what you wanted, then tossed me to the side. Now you want to use me again." Clarke finally undid the last strap of her shirt and let it drop before Lexa could catch it. Her shirt fell and revealed her bare stomach and her bra. Lexa averted her eyes as she tried to help Clarke back into her shirt. "Why not just give you what you want so I won't get hurt later and I can finally be done with you?"
Oh, Clarke... "That's not what I was proposing to you," Lexa explained. Why is she always so difficult? "I did what I had to do at the Mountain, but it pained me to do it. I told you, my duty to my people comes first." Her frustration built that Clarke never seemed to understand that and took everything so personal. Her own happiness was secondary to the good of her people. "This is not easy for me. What I feel for you I haven't felt for anyone, not since Costia was murdered."
Clarke's whole demeanor changed and she felt the blonde surge forward Lexa barely had time to react before she saw a flash of metal and felt the coolness of a blade pressed to her throat. Clarke's hands gripped her shirt like a pincer. There was a brief moment of hesitation where Clarke pulled the knife back a few inches, but it was back pressed against her skin in the next instant. "Good," Clarke snarled. "I will never bow to you, and I will certainly not ever be yours."
She faked being drunk, Lexa realized. She loathed how stupid and reckless she had been. Letting Clarke in here alone had been a mistake, she never should have ordered Indra to leave. "Clarke, you don't have to do this," Lexa said, not a hint of fear in her voice. If her life ended here today, her spirit would carry on to the next chosen Commander.
"I'm sorry, Commander, but I made this decision with my head, not my heart," Clarke replied venomously, throwing back the words Lexa had said to her when she left the Mountain. Several tense moments passed when Clarke loosened her grip and shoved Lexa back. She tossed the knife to the ground beside her and walked to the door, pausing at the entrance. "I hope I never see you again," she said coldly and then she exited the door.
Indra came rushing in and saw Lexa on the ground and the knife laying in front of her. The warrior reached for her sword but Lexa raised a hand. "Commander, she attacked you!" Indra pleaded.
"Let her go," Lexa said. This banquet was about securing peace with the Skaikru, harming Clarke would only endager that. She looked down at the knife and sadness overwhelmed her. It was the knife she had given Clarke while they were planning their attack on Mount Weather. After our kiss. She sadly picked up the symbol of her affection for Clarke and tucked it in the waist of her pants. Why am I weak?