Bitter Sweet
He supposed he should have expected it sooner. Nothing good lasted more than a moment anyway. He tried to keep his thoughts away from her, but it was impossible. Everything was her; taking a bath reminded him of her warm touch, hugging his children reminded him of her slender form, always so fragile, eating reminded him of countless discussions they had had over breakfast, awaking naked and entwined. There was a wing of the castle he no longer frequented because he was always reminded of her father and her desolation when she could not save him. She must have wept for hours at his side in an attempt to save him, but he left her quietly, troubling no one, just as he hadn't in life. Her despair after that was when he had first noticed it. She aged ten years overnight and there was always something missing from her.
She often joked that he was extremely healthy because of all the apples he had shared with Max, but even though he laughed alongside her, he knew there was something wrong. For the first time, he regretted the death of her stepmother, knowing she was the only one who could help him. He brushed off the thought quickly. She took his mind off the world; they helped each other by consuming themselves in one another instead of thinking about the past. And even though she never admitted it, he knew she mourned her stepmother every day of her life.
No one called him Eugene anymore; it was always 'your majesty' this and 'if you please, sire' that. Without her the castle seemed like a string of rooms connected by corridors. His only comfort would have been their children, but they slowly left him, one by one. His daughters now ruled far off lands and his sons were dukes who had left the castle because they knew their ascension to the throne would be impossible.
He cannot leave. He will not leave. Her memory is the only thing he can hold on to, and he expects to lose his mind completely after his children die.
He also knows that they will not let him leave. They would hunt him down and bring him back. It would be too much of a hassle to replace the king now.
He has tried to end it all in the past; many times, in fact. But he can't. He has a lock of her hair under his pillow, and he curses it everyday for not letting him join her. The castle has become his prison and there is not way out of it.
Hope has left him now and he is barely aware of his surroundings anymore. All he can do is pray that he will be allowed to join her one day. There is not doubt that he will eventually go mad, (people are not meant to live as long as he) but until then, his thoughts revolve around her, waiting until he can touch her chestnut hair again.
A/N Reviews are greatly appreciated. Bisous ~ the shattered star