This is set in Haunted, after Father Dom has just told Suze about Jesse moving out and Paul has cornered her in the hallway of the Mission. I was thinking for ages what else could have happened if suddenly Suze had realised it was PAUL who she wanted to be with…not Jesse.
It's going to be a few chapters, short, snappy, but hopefully sweet Lots of fluff, and sexual content, so if that's not your cup of tea click away now before you tarnish your innocent eyes :D
Snort.
But just to let those more er…naive people out there know, there is no sexual content in this chapter! However there is quite a lot of swearing :)
Disclaimers: I am not Meg Cabot blah blah blah…
Enjoy!
There was a lot in that look. Anger, impatience, disgust. But most of all- and I do not think I was mistaken about this- there was hurt. Seriously. Paul was hurt by what I'd said to him. It never occurred to me that Paul could be hurt. A second later, he'd broken eye contact with me, turned around and strode out of school. (from Haunted)
And suddenly I felt bad. I felt guilty. But strangely, I felt lonely all of a sudden. Did this mean I actually liked Paul? That he was actually right when he'd said to me just a few minutes ago, confidently stating that "I must like him a little bit".
Maybe it was true.
Abruptly, without thinking, I started to run after Paul, heading to the parking lot, ignoring CeeCee's shouts and gasps from the other onlookers. I knew what I was doing. Cheesy or not, I had 'seen the light'. Jesse didn't seem to love me, and amazingly I found it didn't bother me if he did or didn't anymore. Who did he think he was anyway, to make Father Dom do his breaking up for him? Well he can break up with me all he likes, but I'm already gone. I finally understood why I had been scared of Paul- it was because what he'd been saying to me all this time, about me and him, was true. I realised that I had hated him with such passion because I couldn't dare to think about what he was saying properly, in case I saw it was true.
There was a fine line between love and hate, and now I realised what side I was on which concerned Paul. Now I think about it, I think I crossed over to the 'love' side quite a while ago. I just guess I wasn't ready to admit it to myself.
Panting, I rounded the corner just in time to see Paul throwing himself into his BMW and simultaneously slamming the door shut.
I suddenly felt nervous. What if he didn't want me anymore? What if he was so disgusted in me, that he'd seen what a horrid person I was? I just couldn't take it if he rejected me, although I guess I should have a taste of my own medicine. But how cruel would it be, to finally realise that it was Paul whom I loved, only to find he didn't feel that way about me anymore. I couldn't take being dumped by two people in one day. I mean, come on. A girl has to have some standards.
While I was standing there, dithering about how Paul would take my new illumination on our relationship, he threw his car into gear and rapidly started to exit the parking lot.
Shit!
Panicking and not wanting to miss him, I impulsively ran out in front of him to block the exit. Paul swore loudly and slammed on the brakes. "SUZE!" He yelled, rolling his window down so he could shout at me easier.
Yay.
"What the FUCK do you think you're doing? Jesus! I could have fucking run you over! I could have bloody killed you if it wasn't for my superb reflexes and driving skills!"
I snorted. Yeah right. Ok, Paul may have some driving skills, but I scoffed at the thought of them being 'superb'.
Er Suze? You haven't even taken your text yet. Paul's been driving for ages.
Oh yeah. Oh well. "Suze, hello?"
"What?" Paul rolled his eyes in annoyance. "Why did you run out here and nearly allow me to kill you? You can't have come back to apologise so if you've finished gloating can you move out of the way so I can go home".
Erm…I shifted my feet uncomfortably. "Er, well the thing is Paul…I…er…erm…" Why did my mouth have to dry up now? Why?
Stupid mouth.
There was a silence as Paul waited for me to continue. But I couldn't. My heart was beating so fast it felt like I had run all the way to New York and back, and then done a casual swim to Australia. He drummed his fingers on the steering wheel, clearly not wanting to respond to me. Paul then sighed irritably and started driving forward. Towards me.
"Get out of the way Suze", he called. "I don't have all day so could you just move." He emphasized how much he wanted me to move by inching the car forward by another couple of feet.
Shit. I didn't want him to go! But neither did I fancy getting run over. I just wanted him to stay, to listen to what I was trying to say. Damn. Me, Suze Simon, wanted Paul Slater to stay with her. I must like him. "Wait!" I managed to croak out, flapping my hands like an escaped lunatic. "Just wait you dickhead!"
Yeah, Suze, that will really make him wait, you insulting him like that.
Paul raised his eyebrows. Fuck. I am so cool. Not. Why do I always make a complete idiot of myself in front of him? Practically screaming at him, I said "Look, I…I'M SORRY OK!"
See what I mean? A huge, colossal idiot. And then I made it worse. I started babbling.
"I was thinking about what you said and yeah, ok, I've ignored a lot of it but when I actually thought about it, it wasn't as stupid as it first sounded and I mean Jesse dumped me, but like a stupid childish fuck he got a bloody priest to do it, but you really seem to like me, well I mean you did until just now and I'm sorry about that, I just wasn't thinking and now I am and I mean Jesse is dead but you're alive and I don't think I love Jesse but I think I love you but its too late beca-OOF!"
I broke off due to the fact that Paul had pounced on me. Really that's the only way I can describe it. One minute he was sitting as cool as you please in his car, the next he was flying at me. And started kissing the hell out of me.
Which I really had no objection to whatsoever.
"So I'm guessing you still like me?" I asked him as we came up for air. He responded with another series of fierce kisses, until he stopped to say "Of course I do Suze. I've never stopped".
Can I just say one thing?
AWWWWWWWWWW! Suze is happy, happy, happy =D
"You really mean it? You don't like Jesse anymore?" He looked at me hopefully, and I couldn't resist kissing his nose before adding, "No, I actually don't. I thought he was perfect for me ya know?" I bit my lip. "But he wasn't. He couldn't even tell me he didn't want me to my face. How low is that?"
"So you're not kissing me to make Jesse jealous?" Paul asked, furrowing his brow.
"No I'm not." I reassured him. "I'm kissing you because I want to and because I like it."
The responding grin I got from Paul was so dazzling, so cute, that I wanted to hug him tight and never, ever let go. How could I have not seen before that it was Paul, not Jesse who belonged with me? How could I have been so stupid? I decided Jesse's spurs must have confused me.
Stupid spurs.
