Okay, so FFN deleted five of my fics back in May due to profanity in the title/summary and I never had the motivation to repost them. Now... Well, I'm sick and I figured I might as well get around to it. I apologize to those of you who have been waiting for these to be posted again, but better late than never, right? I've edited the profanity out of the title/summary, so this hopefully doesn't happen again.

As always, reviews are love. Even if it's something short.

Disclaimer: Glee does not belong to me.

Sext-y Distraction
Oneshot

Wanna fuck?

Can't. In class.

Kurt rolled his eyes, sliding his phone back under his notebook as it lit up again.

So?

So I'm two hours away. Doesn't work very well.

I hate your fucking school.

I know.

Blaine sent him a questioning look and Kurt mouthed his boyfriend/bed buddy/whatever-the-hell-they-were's name. A frown overtook the Warbler's face, his dislike for Puck as plain as it always had been.

Kurt didn't get it.

Blaine had had his chance and he didn't take it. Kurt wasn't going to spend years pining over someone again like he'd done with Finn. He moved on. Granted it was to Puck, the bisexual manwhore of Lima, but still.

Bisexual.

That had caused some waves with Blaine when he found out. After the comments he'd made to the other boy during Blaine's bi phase, it was a bit well-deserved. He didn't understand it himself. Didn't understand why he didn't blink when Puck said he was bi.

Probably because it's Puck and he'd told Mercedes that the mohawked boy would run out of girls one day.

Then Puck asked how sick Kurt was of being a virgin and...

Suffice to say that he wasn't a virgin anymore.

He still blamed that day on Puck and his complaining about his overly sensitive, newly pierced nipple (the other one, not the scarred one that Kurt had sucked on while he twisted the other). He'd told Puck later that his new placement of the ring sent a very different message to some in the LGBT world.

(For that knowledge, he blamed those damn pamphlets his dad gave him. There was no way his dad actually looked at what was inside them.)

Puck hadn't looked surprised.

Which was weird.

He smirked.

Which wasn't.

Asked Kurt how he wanted him, because Puckzilla was badass enough to take it up the ass.

Kurt learned.

A lot.

One, that Puck is more flexible than should be humanly possible.

Two, that Puck's a screamer.

And three, that Mr. Schue still blushes whenever he sees either one of them.

I want you. So fucking horny.

You're always horny.

Want you in me. Stretching me open. Fucking me with your fingers until I'm almost there.

Oh, God.

Kurt made a muffled noise in the back of his throat, overactive imagination forming the picture. If he closed his eyes, he could almost feel Puck's heat around his fingers, so open for him and only him, because he said no one else was badass enough to take him the way Kurt does.

Take me hard and fast. Legs over your shoulders and bending me in half. So tight.

His pants were getting uncomfortably snug, dick straining against the tailored pants of his uniform. He bit his lip, blood rushing south.

That Blaine dude lives right next to you. I'd fucking scream. Make him regret what he passed on.

As if Blaine knew what the text said, he looked over and sent Kurt a disapproving look. Not that he knew all the facts. Kurt kept the two of them as far apart as possible.

Blaine still thought he was the one bottoming.

Maybe use that vibrator. Turn it on as high as it fucking goes and push it inside. Right next to you.

Kurt jerked in his seat, stomach clenching, and forcing back the moan that was halfway up his throat.

"Everything alright, Mr. Hummel?" Mr. Albright asked, glaring at him in annoyance.

"Yes," he ground out. "Sorry. Muscle spasm."

Are you hard?

Fucking hell yes.

Rub yourself. Pretend it's me. Close your eyes and imagine me sucking you off. Taking you down until I have every last inch.

Kurt pressed his eyes closed, one hand slipping below his desk to palm at his dick.

He was going to kill Puck.

Wished more than anything right then that he was still in Lima. Wished that he hadn't accepted Dalton's dorming option when the commute got too hard. It was the middle of the week. He had no proper excuse to go home and he seriously doubted his dad would accept him saying that he drove two hours to fuck Puck through the mattress.

Fuck me. I'm gonna come.

Kurt swallowed back a groan, imagining Puck's face as he came. Eyes closed. Head thrown back. Bottom lip between his teeth . Kurt's name spilling out of Puck's mouth in a keening moan.

He added pressure, rubbing harder. Once. Twice. Three times before he buried his face in his free arm and came, teeth biting his Dalton blazer.

The bell rang while he was still trying to catch his breath and he booked it before Blaine could approach him for another he-isn't-good-for-you talk. He pressed his book bag over his soaked crotch, practically running back to his dorm.

Where Puck was lying on his bed.

Naked.

And that fucking vibrator buried deep inside as he absolutely trembled.

"Wanna fuck?" He grinned, pushing the toy back inside with a loud moan.

They didn't make it to dinner.

Hell, they didn't make it to class the next day.

The End

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