SPIDER-GIRL:
THE PARKER CLICHÉ
WRITTEN BY ZARIUS
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Spider-Girl, Spider-Man, or any of the characters in this piece. All are trademarked by Marvel Comics.
Just a quick story I wrote to dimiss all the crap going on in the mainstream Spider-Man books, and to remind everyone of the much missed MC2 Universe, the home of Peter and MJ's daughter. I consider this universe the real Spider-Man continuity and it's my "thankyou" for it's influencial twelve year run. Thanks for the memories Tom DeFalco, Ron Frenz, and everyone else who made that book a gem. Enjoy.
She didn't scream. This time.
She figured it was because Benjy was asleep, and that her subconscious mind was restraining her for his sake, so he'd have another peaceful night, without a care in the world, surrounded by loved ones who would do everything to shelter him from feeling terrified.
But Benjy had an awareness about him that nobody could quite place their finger on. Just the other day he reached out to his sister while they were at breakfast, a gentle gesture, offering her the metal spoon he was often fascinated with when served breakfast in the morning. A still point in his life, and one he hoped would offer similar interest to his older sibling at a time when she was visibly down.
May "Mayday Parker" chalked it up to her brother's own unique brand of Spider-Sense. It wouldn't surprise her at this stage of the game. His powers had been triggered months ago thanks to being temporarily bonded with the Carnage symbiote, and he'd already seen action saving her entire family from their age-old enemy Norman Osborn.
While that was an amazing feat in itself, she felt this was something Benjy couldn't deal with, it was a psychological issue, not a physically taxing one, and for all his early accomplishments, Benjy was still an infant, and unable to properly process the sort of thing she was going through. She even worried about what would happen the day he would have to go through the same thing.
Mayday pulled back the sheets and sprung out of her bed. She rubbed her eyes gently and looked at her bedroom clock
2:45 AM
A time for everyone, particularly perky by-the-book high school students, to be sleeping.
Except of course for late shift workers and caffeine-obsessed college nightowls.
And one other.
She walked over to her cell phone on the dresser, picked it up, and punched in a certain number, the home number of the boy who was fast becoming her everything. Wes Westin. Aspiring comic artist, her best friend, and for the past six months now, her boyfriend., each knowing one another's secrets, and being able to open up about anything.
Such was the case tonight.
"Yeah" came Wes' voice on the other end of the phone
"Hey, it's me" Mayday said excitedly, "I had another bad spell, you got a pen and paper ready?"
"May, you need to stop with this, really", Wes replied. Mayday, already aggravated by the lack of sleep at this hour, wasn't keen on absorbing this bit of news.
"Why not?" she asked.
"I'm starting to feel guilty" Wes answered.
"Hey, you said it was fun" Mayday replied. Whatever Wes was tiring of, she wanted him to take the whole blame for igniting the spark
"Yeah when it STARTED" Wes continued, "That was back when I had blocks on the brain, now I'm starting to flex myself creatively again, I don't need the 'inspiration', besides I don't think visualising your nightmares is helping you any"
Mayday groaned. A means of coping was starting to fade. She collapsed on top of the bed with the phone and grabbed one of her teddy bears, pressing it firmly to her chest.
"What is it with you creative comic book types and your muses? You always move on to the next big mentality and drop the old ways even when they're working" she lamented
"They don't always work sweetheart" Wes replied, "Jimmy and I got bad feedback on the last issue we did…I mean, a guy takes over the heroine's father's body and macks on her mother? All kinds of jumbled up morality messes can come from that, I have to think of the kids when I'm drawing this comic"
"Nice to know you're thinking about kids" Mayday warmly teased.
"It's just a personal thing babe" Wes continued, "I'm seeing such a lack of responsibility from other comic bigwigs in the industry these days, guys who are thinking only about what they loved in their heyday and finding all kinds of reprehensible means of shaking their favourite heroes to get them "back to basics". It's insane how many are suckered in by this trend right now, and so many young audiences are being left questioning the characters morals and motives, rather than aspire to be them"
"I guess exciting doesn't necessarily mean innovative. Sorry about that Wes" Mayday replied. "I thought I was really helping you out for a while there"
"Don't worry, the comic's survived worse" Wes assured her, "I just get worried about what you see whenever you read what I've drawn from your nightmares, I feel you're not escaping those problems, but being reminded of them at every turn. You need to talk to someone who gets this, I know you want me in on the ground floor for everything, and that's what I love about our relationship, but you've got more than me in this with you. Spread the fear as well as the love, and you might get fearless much faster"
"Alright alright, you win" Mayday conceded "At least now you can go back to keeping your plotlines secret from me so I'll be as surprised and in awe of your genius as much as everyone else"
"I love you" Wes said, following a cliché of the boyfriend tradition to a tea.
"I love you too" Mayday replied, following up on the girlfriend cliché. She put the phone down and contemplated trying to get to sleep, but she felt a little peckish, so she figured a post-midnight snack was in order
She put on her pink furry bear slippers, quietly slid out of her room, and walked down the stairs, processing the latest of her bad dreams and trying to put into perspective.
She had thought telling Wes about them would be helpful, that by making them something tangible in comic form, she could inspire true art and feel a bit better about herself, use the might of a nightmare against itself, and transform it into something that could be appreciated.
But if that wasn't going to be the case anymore, she wondered just what could keep the nightmares from affecting her self-esteem.
After all, she was Spider-Girl. An everyday fixture of the superhero community. Happy, go-lucky, full of wit and cheer, always seeing the good in everyone, even those who commit to the most unpardonable acts.
She had seen such darkness over the years, was that now, not so subtly, beginning to envelop her? Had it been merely repressed all this time, and not stamped out?
She thought back to other nightmarish visions she had, some when her career was starting out, some when she was clearly established. She once imagined she was the Black Tarantula and had lost her parents, leaving only her and an older Benjy against a more frightening world with deadlier enemies.
And then there was the vision that almost forced her to try and change her own destiny and avoid death at all costs. A death she almost didn't avoid despite her best efforts.
Death was something that really concerned her. Death is what was hanging over her family all the time.
The thought of Death often hung over her, it made her nauseous. Uncertain.
And in this instance, more peckish than ever.
She made her way into the half-closed door leading to the kitchen. She noticed the light was on, and peered through the door. Her spider-sense wasn't going off so she figured it wasn't anything too dangerous.
Then she peered around the door and saw what she was up against.
She changed her mind.
This WAS dangerous.
"Mayday? Is that you?" a sweet and alert voice rang out from behind the door. Mayday gulped.
She knew what was standing between her and a box of cheese crackers, and she knew it was going to be a long night.
A night where she'd have to have a TALK.
After a second or two, Mayday composed herself, opened the door, and stepped inside the kitchen
"Yeah mom, it's me" she said, answering the call of Mary Jane Watson-Parker, her mother, and the wife of her father, Peter Parker, the Amazing Spider-Man. His rock, his soul mate, and his everything.
She sat at the dinner table, draped in a nightgown that was barely concealing a pink "world's most ruthless mother" t-shirt, a cup of hot coffee in her hand.
"So…" Mayday began, "What are you doing up?"
"You have school tomorrow" Mary Jane uttered in a quiet, yet sharply-spoken manner, "This had better be good"
Mayday realized it was hopeless to try and counter-argue. She cut to the chase.
"I can't sleep. I had a nightmare" Mayday replied.
Mary Jane pulled up a chair, "Tell me about it"
"Tell you what, let's trade" Mayday proposed, "you tell me what you're doing up, and I'll give you my beef"
"Fair enough" Mary Jane said, half-smiling. Mayday sat down,. She looked at the cabinet above and silently pointed to it, her mother nodded, seemingly approving something, Mayday reached up and opened it, pulling out an open box of crackers. She left it in the middle of the table, and the two began taking one out of it and nibbling them, Mayday ate hers with fanatic energy.
"So shoot, what's' holding you up?" Mayday began, portions of the cracker still lodged in her mouth.
"Your father was talking in his sleep" Mary Jane answered, taking a sip of the coffee, "After hearing what I heard, you'd want to keep active a bit too, just in case"
"What was he saying?" Mayday asked, more concerned.
"Oh just the usual hang-ups. Worried some big guy wearing a horn on his head is going to crash through the house looking for you, me, and Benjy and pin us to the wall…worried sick he'll become some sentient killer and murder us while we sleep." Mary Jane continued
"Did you wake him?" Mayday asked. Mary Jane shook her head
"Why not?" Mayday questioned
"Because it's back the following day" Mary Jane responded "And the day after, and even if the day came where you retire, which we Parkers do about a thousand times without ever sticking to it, the thoughts would still be there. That's just the way it is. Chalk it up to the breadcrumbs left behind over the years by Peter's past. He's always left a trail, and some have been smart enough to follow it, so the danger others will keep following it is always there"
"That's how the Parker Luck's always went mom" Mayday replied
"It's funny" Mary Jane continued, "Your father always thought of the Parker Luck as some bad vibe charm, in truth it just comes down to logistics and reality. He's not as impeccably crafty as Reed Richards or as heavily fortified as Tony Stark, he's just a smart guy in a really funny looking bit of spandex throwing it all out there, hoping the wind blows in the right direction that day. Like all aspects of life, the weather conditions are not always ideal, he's had to deal with that fact all his life, and he's never really appreciated it"
"And you do?" Mayday added. Mary Jane shrugged her shoulders
"I don't appreciate it, I don't think anyone does, but I think I've always understood it better than him, which is why we're so great together"
"Yeah, you two together. Like glue. Swear that'll never change" Mayday said.
"It never will" Mary Jane replied
"Promise me" Mayday insisted
"May, what's the matter?" Mary Jane replied, "You're getting agitated"
"It's…it's this dream I had. Just now. It's why I'm up" Mayday began, "I…dreamt dad missed your wedding, all those years ago, for some reason cell phones were involved, strange given you got married in 1987, but that's besides the point, the idea was you got cold feet about marriage after that, but you couldn't shake your feelings for dad, so you agreed to stay with him, but in exchange, you wanted to keep well away from ever having children, in case they were hurt as a result of him being Spider-Man, so I basically never existed throughout your years of living together"
Mary Jane was taken aback by this.
"I'd never do that to your father honey" she replied, " I always wanted to have kids with him, it wouldn't have mattered if we were married or not, nothing would have stopped me having a family"
"I know, I know, but I can't shake this dread I have" Mayday continued "Anyway, it gets worse…remember when I told you about that "Imagine This" independent comic that Wes got so excited about?"
"Yeah, that sensationalist "Civil War" garbage where all of our heroes fought one another over some ridiculous registration act" Mary Jane recalled
"I didn't tell Wes because, god bless him, he'd never live down influencing me like that, but it played a part in my dream" Mayday revealed, "Dad unmasked to the world and everyone came gunning for him, including your own family, Great Aunt Anna was targeted, and you were injured. Peter wiped everyone's memories of who he was except yours, and you saw that as the last straw and left him, then you told him you…you…"
Mayday began trembling, small tears began running down her face
"You said you weren't strong enough for him"
"Oh sweetheart, come here" Mary Jane replied, walking over to Mayday and holding her in her arms "You must feel awful"
"I've been awful these last few months, Wes and I tried coping with it by incorporating them into his comics, but he's gone sour on that now…I don't know what's wrong with me mom" Mayday spoke, choking up.
"Calm down, calm down, let's not wake Peter or Benjy up with all this commotion, let's get it settled tonight"
Mayday took that as a silent instruction to continue pouring out the details of her latest nightmare
"It's just…no matter what I did, it just got worse and worse, first you "friend-zoned" dad, then you insisted Carlie Cooper was the right girl for him…"
Mary Jane stopped her.
"What was that?" she said
"Carlie Cooper" Mayday repeated, drying her eyes.
"I haven't heard that name in a long time" Mary Jane replied
"I remember my dad sometimes brought me in to his work" Mayday explained "I met her there. She was very kind to me"
"Yes, she's who initially offered your father a place in the force" Mary Jane recalled, "She showed him the ropes a little when he eventually joined up shortly after hanging up the webs, but she moved to Seattle when you were five. Last I heard she got married to a country singer and settled down"
Mary Jane stared at Mayday awkwardly
"You seriously thought I'd ever suggest SHE hook up with HIM? She was barely interested in him that way" Mary Jane responded.
"What can I say? All those times she gave me lollypops really left an impression on me" Mayday joked, throwing her hands up in the air as if to say "well shucks"
The two broke into fits of laughter, both realizing just how ridiculous this all was.
"This is worse than the time I dreamt Deborah Whitman fancied Morbius The Living Vampire" Mary Jane confessed, drying her eyes
Mayday wasn't entirely sure who Deborah Whitman was, but she felt obliged to laugh along with her mother, clearly making light of the situation was the priority. Eventually, Mayday decided to get to the bottom of her dilemma. She felt now was the time for proper resolution
"Seriously mom" Mayday began "…You've always got an answer, so level with me, what do you think brings this sort of thing on?"
"The Parker cliché" Mary Jane immediately replied.
"Parker what?" Mayday replied in befuddlement.
"Your father went dimension-hopping with the Fantastic Four when you were a year old" Mary Jane revealed, "They were pursuing The Frightful Four and The Shocker through several realities, they'd gotten their hands on something called a "Quantum Bolt", whatever that was, and were inflicting a lot of damage. As the battle spread across this crazy multiverse, Peter met several versions of himself, some very similar, some with incredibly weird stories to tell, but he found they all had one thing in common, something I came to dub "The Parker Cliché""
"Sounds like a high-school meme for the unpopular types" Mayday added.
"Basically, it's "expect the worst, wake up to the best"" Mary Jane explained "Every version of himself that Peter met, they had the same kind of status quoe-altering dreams. One dreamt something simple like still being single and living with your great Aunt May. Another dreamt he married a clone of me, obviously thinking he had too good of a sure thing, and one dreamt up something that one could call the ULTIMATE nightmare: Being killed in battle and leaving his loved ones all alone just days after his birthday"
"And THAT sounds worse, like dad really doesn't entertain the idea of being happy" Mayday concluded. Mary Jane shook her head
"Oh he enjoys being happy, he just doesn't know when it'll all go away, because he never lets go of his duty, his love, for his fellow man, to better someone even if it means angering others. He, and as he told me, many other versions of him, are constantly on edge, expecting every day to be their last, but each of them vowed that tomorrow WOULD be another day for them, because he had us, his reward for putting up with reality, waiting for him at the begining and end of those days"
"So what about us Parker women…do we have the same mentality?" Mayday added.
Mary Jane grazed the tender cheek of her daughter lovingly, "Sweetheart, while you're just like how your father was at his age, you're just like me at that age too. You picture all these terrifying visuals of separation, hurt, and anguish in your head, but the side of your psyche that is anchored to reality reminds you that you'll never let those days come to pass"
"You should have been a psychologist" Mayday remarked.
Mary Jane giggled. "I almost was, once upon a time" she said, taking another sip of coffee and looking at her daughter with affection. "At least 'till you fell back into my lap"
Mayday reached over and kissed her mother on the forehead. "Sorry for being such a cliché" she said.
"Don't be. I never am" Mary Jane replied.
The two stared at the clock, it was now 3:20.
"You'd better get back to sleep. If I didn't know better, I'd swear it was your worry your equations are well off that's keeping these nightmares up"
Mayday understood and got up, preparing to go back to her bedroom
"I suppose that's another variation on the Parker cliché: We'll never stop being bookworms will we?"
"You'll never stop PERIOD. And that's why you'll always win" her mother assured her.
And so Mayday Parker went back to sleep, and as she settled back into slumber land, her dreams again took form
The problems were not immediately solved. She would dream of Superior Spider-Men, an island full of civilians with her father's powers, she would dream of kindly "perfect mom replacement" Carlie Cooper breaking up with her father and leaving him alone, but she would also dream of her mother's undying, unconditional love for her father, something that was given form in yet another nightmarish scenario, where her mother made a deal with the demon lord Mephisto to save the life of a dying Aunt May in exchange for her marriage to Peter.
As the Peter of this dream contemplated the deal, her mother assured him that no matter what, no force in this universe, not god, not the devil, not anyone, would stand between them and their happiness, and that they would find each other again.
So the dream, and every other dream after that, became a journey for Mayday, a journey of hope and encouragement that would inspire her to do even greater good in her costumed exploits as Spider-Girl.
So inspired by her nightmare, she would tell Wes about it the next day. One last hope that a visual of hers could inspire others.
"A deal with the devil? Mayday, that is the single worst idea I've heard for a comic book plot in my life" was his exact response.
THE END…FOR NOW