Written for comment_fic on livejournal
The prompt was Jane Austen characters, Wedding night
It is a well-observed truth that soon after one has experienced the waves of carnal pleasure, one's mind turns toward pity for all those who lacked such good fortune.
It was in this spirit therefore that Emma spoke her first post-consummation words to her new husband: "Perhaps I should write a book."
"A book, Emma?"
"For new wives, and wives-to-be. About the most excellent methods of coupling."
Knightley laughed, "Are you certain, Emma, that you have the necessary expertise?"
"What are you saying?"
"Er, nothing."
"It's settled, then. I shall write the definitive volume on carnal bliss."
It is unclear what combination of amusement and a desire to provoke inspired Knightley's next words: "Excellent. I shall loan you my copy of Fanny Hill so you'll have a proper model."
"Nonsense, Mr. Knightley. I have my own copy. A first edition. And the works by that scoundrel Mr. Wilmot as well. Of course the largest part of my collection is translations from the French."
While speechless for a moment, the brave Mr. Knightley recovered his senses and answered, "I have always admired your love of the literary, Mrs. Knightley."
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