The Crocodile Hunters
By Riley
Pairings: None
Rating: G.
Type: Comedy.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters and I'm not making any money from this story.
Turnbull stood in the consulate foyer biting his nails and whimpering. "Turnbull, would you please be quiet then I can hear it!" Fraser spoke in a clipped tone, his eyes darting around like an eagle's. Turnbull balled a fist into his mouth. Dief cowered near Fraser's legs. "And you're no use either. Really, a grown wolf afraid. It's embarrassing."
The consulate door opened. Turnbull shrieked. Dief literally sprang into the air, and Fraser stiffened. They all relaxed a little as Ovitz stuck his head around the door. "Have you caught it yet?" Fraser shook his head in the negative. "Thought you might want to know she's heading this way."
Turnbull yelped. Fraser muttered, "Oh dear!" and Dief skulked around Ovitz and out of the door; he then ran off in the opposite direction to Thatcher. "Thank you very much. Leave me to carry the can," Fraser shouted after the deaf wolf.
"Good luck. I wonder which one of you she'll fire first!" Ovitz sniggered.
"You know, it wouldn't kill you to help us!" Fraser scolded.
"Yeah, you see that's just the point, it probably would. See ya!"
"What are we going to do now!" Fraser spoke more to himself than Turnbull.
"Um, couldn't we just not mention it sir!"
"Yes, because that would work wonderfully. How would we explain to the Inspector the entire staffs reluctance to enter the building? Why they are all currently standing in front of the consulate? And what if it bit someone, hmm?"
Fraser let out an exasperated breath. He put his hands on his hips and shook his head. "Really Turnbull, why on earth did you buy the animal in the first place?"
"I didn't know it was that. The man told me it was a lizard, an Iguana."
"Surely you realised what it was!"
"Nnno. It was only small. I thought they were larger."
"Yes, but they're small when they've just been born. And where did you acquire such an animal anyway?"
"That friend of Detective Vecchio's."
Fraser frowned. "Which friend was that?"
"The one the other month, at the docks."
Fraser's eyes went wide. "Not the one with 'kill the pigs' and 'anarchy' tattooed on his arms!"
"Yes, that's the one. I saw him in that nice bar by the docks, you know the leather fancy-dress one. And he said he knew Detective Vecchio."
"Oh, Turnbull! Really, sometimes I wonder how you got through the selection process, let alone the training academy! He knew Ray because he'd been arrested by him in the past. He was, and still is I assume, a criminal."
"But he seemed so nice!"
"Yes, they sometimes do."
The door burst open. "What the hell is going on here?" Thatcher yelled. "Why has the consulate been evacuated? I asked Ovitz, he said it has something to do with you two. Why am I not surprised!" Noticing for the first time what Fraser was holding, she added, "Why have you got a rifle? Is that a tranquilliser rifle!" She crossed her arms and waited for his answer.
"Sir," before Fraser could say anymore, out of the corner of his eye he saw the animal advance towards Thatcher. He reacted quickly. Dropping his rifle on the foyer table, he took hold of her. Tackling her, he rolled them out of the way.
"FRASER! What..." she stopped as she followed his gaze. Fraser picked up the rifle and took aim. He fired a dart into the animal. The animal remained still after the dart had entered it. Holding his hand out, Fraser helped Inspector Thatcher to her feet. She stared at the sleeping animal for several minutes, before calmly asking, "Fraser, why is there a crocodile in my consulate?"
By Riley
Pairings: None
Rating: G.
Type: Comedy.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters and I'm not making any money from this story.
Turnbull stood in the consulate foyer biting his nails and whimpering. "Turnbull, would you please be quiet then I can hear it!" Fraser spoke in a clipped tone, his eyes darting around like an eagle's. Turnbull balled a fist into his mouth. Dief cowered near Fraser's legs. "And you're no use either. Really, a grown wolf afraid. It's embarrassing."
The consulate door opened. Turnbull shrieked. Dief literally sprang into the air, and Fraser stiffened. They all relaxed a little as Ovitz stuck his head around the door. "Have you caught it yet?" Fraser shook his head in the negative. "Thought you might want to know she's heading this way."
Turnbull yelped. Fraser muttered, "Oh dear!" and Dief skulked around Ovitz and out of the door; he then ran off in the opposite direction to Thatcher. "Thank you very much. Leave me to carry the can," Fraser shouted after the deaf wolf.
"Good luck. I wonder which one of you she'll fire first!" Ovitz sniggered.
"You know, it wouldn't kill you to help us!" Fraser scolded.
"Yeah, you see that's just the point, it probably would. See ya!"
"What are we going to do now!" Fraser spoke more to himself than Turnbull.
"Um, couldn't we just not mention it sir!"
"Yes, because that would work wonderfully. How would we explain to the Inspector the entire staffs reluctance to enter the building? Why they are all currently standing in front of the consulate? And what if it bit someone, hmm?"
Fraser let out an exasperated breath. He put his hands on his hips and shook his head. "Really Turnbull, why on earth did you buy the animal in the first place?"
"I didn't know it was that. The man told me it was a lizard, an Iguana."
"Surely you realised what it was!"
"Nnno. It was only small. I thought they were larger."
"Yes, but they're small when they've just been born. And where did you acquire such an animal anyway?"
"That friend of Detective Vecchio's."
Fraser frowned. "Which friend was that?"
"The one the other month, at the docks."
Fraser's eyes went wide. "Not the one with 'kill the pigs' and 'anarchy' tattooed on his arms!"
"Yes, that's the one. I saw him in that nice bar by the docks, you know the leather fancy-dress one. And he said he knew Detective Vecchio."
"Oh, Turnbull! Really, sometimes I wonder how you got through the selection process, let alone the training academy! He knew Ray because he'd been arrested by him in the past. He was, and still is I assume, a criminal."
"But he seemed so nice!"
"Yes, they sometimes do."
The door burst open. "What the hell is going on here?" Thatcher yelled. "Why has the consulate been evacuated? I asked Ovitz, he said it has something to do with you two. Why am I not surprised!" Noticing for the first time what Fraser was holding, she added, "Why have you got a rifle? Is that a tranquilliser rifle!" She crossed her arms and waited for his answer.
"Sir," before Fraser could say anymore, out of the corner of his eye he saw the animal advance towards Thatcher. He reacted quickly. Dropping his rifle on the foyer table, he took hold of her. Tackling her, he rolled them out of the way.
"FRASER! What..." she stopped as she followed his gaze. Fraser picked up the rifle and took aim. He fired a dart into the animal. The animal remained still after the dart had entered it. Holding his hand out, Fraser helped Inspector Thatcher to her feet. She stared at the sleeping animal for several minutes, before calmly asking, "Fraser, why is there a crocodile in my consulate?"