Yet another fic from the SJFic Word of the Week Challenge. This one was written for the word 'Tempest'. I know it's not more TTWC or BBE, but I hope you enjoy it anyway! And if you're really lucky, I mightbe able to post the next part of 'Trouble With...' later today ;)

Dead Man Walking

By Chezza

Warnings: Mitchell-Baiting, Minor Language & Parodying

Disclaimer: Stargate's not mine as I'm sure you all know,

nor do it's characters belong to me.

This kind of writing earns me no dough,

so you get to read my fic for free!

Authors Notes: Mitchell seems to have taken the place of Daniel as my character of choice to be evil towards. Good for Daniel, bad for Mitchell. Shame, eh?

© Chezza, July 2006

o0o

The sound of ferocious swearing intermingled with the occasional loud crash from within Sam's lab, brought Daniel and Teal'c's progress towards the place in question, to an abrupt halt.

Teal'c gave Daniel a grave look. Which wasn't really anything new.

"It appears Colonel Carter is already aware of the information we bring her."

Daniel cringed as an extra-loud crash reverberated through the air.

"It does seem that way, doesn't it?" He agreed.

A shout from down the corridor reluctantly pulled their attention away from the sounds of mayhem, issuing from inside the lab before them.

"Hey guys, wait up!"

They turned and watched Mitchell run down the corridor towards them, with a certain degree of impatience. After all, what was happening in Sam's lab was far more entertaining. Catching up to them, Mitchell leant over with his hands on his knees, trying to catch his breath.

Daniel looked at Teal'c. Teal'c looked at Daniel. They both looked at Mitchell.

He waggled a hand to signify he needed a minute then gradually straightened up, having presumably caught enough breath to speak. However, before he could say a word, a smashing sound followed by the sound of tinkling glass made him jump and wheel round to stare at the doorway behind him.

There was a momentary pause. The words which followed it, brought Daniel very close to blushing. He was fairly sure that wouldn't be physically possible, even if you were a contortionist by trade. The mere thought was enough to make his eyes water.

He didn't even want to think where Sam had learnt it. Probably from those loud-mouthed pilots who manned the F302s aboard the Prometheus. It sounded like something Mitchell would know.

Teal'c on the other hand settled for raising both eyebrows. A move which Daniel considered to be technically cheating, since it was in fact easier than raising one alone.

"Woah!" Mitchell said, his eyes wide with admiration. "That's a new one. Gotta try and remember that..."

Daniel mentally shifted the blame for Sam's vocabulary onto Jack's shoulders.

Another loud bang made them all flinch. Well, Mitchell and himself anyway, Daniel amended. He didn't think there was anything less than a shot from a staff weapon, which would make Teal'c flinch. And possibly not even that, if past experience was anything to go by.

Mitchell looked at him in question.

"What's up with Sam?"

Daniel coughed and wondered how to phrase it delicately.

"I think she…received some bad news."

Hearing this, Mitchell smirked and proceeded to look incredibly pleased with himself.

"No kidding! Well, I know just the thing to cheer her up! I've just come from Landry's office. He's approved my suggestion that we go check out the latest improvements to the F302s. We ship out to Area 51 later today. Cool, huh?"

Daniel couldn't help but wince.

"That was you?"

Mitchell's face began to lose its smirk.

"Yeah."

Daniel winced again.

"Oh dear."

Mitchell was now frowning in confusion. Something he seemed to do a lot, Daniel had noticed. Only, unlike with Jack, Daniel always found it difficult to tell whether or not Mitchell was faking. In this case? He suspected not.

"Why?"

Daniel never got the chance to reply.

"Mitchell, if that's your voice I hear, you should know that I am going to kick your ass so damn hard, you won't be able to sit down long enough, to fly your precious F302!"

Mitchell paled and looked askance at Daniel.

"Jackson?"

Daniel and Teal'c silently exchanged glances and in a synchronous movement which spoke of years working side by side as part of a team, they simultaneously took two steps backwards.

Mitchell also took two steps backwards.

Down the corridor.

It was a good job that he did, as Sam Carter appeared at the entrance to her lab with a look of complete and utter fury on her face. Blue eyes flashing, she was the epitome of pure rage. A tempest in human form.

"You!" She snarled, pointing at Mitchell. "You are a dead man!"

Oh boy, indeed. Daniel was very, very glad that it wasn't him at whom her anger was aimed.

For once choosing the sensible option, Mitchell made the most of his head-start. He turned heel and raced down the corridor.

Sam wasn't far behind him.

"Get back here, Mitchell!"

Mitchell's plaintive cry could be heard echoing back to where Daniel and Teal'c stood, as he tried desperately to stay out of Sam Carter's reach.

"Jackson! What did I do!"

Daniel turned to Teal'c.

"Want to bet that was Jack on the phone, telling Sam why she won't be flying out to Washington this weekend, after all?"

Teal'c smirked.

"I would not be so foolish as to waste my money in such a fashion."

Daniel nodded.

"Of course not… Think we should go rescue him?"

Teal'c's smirk grew wider as Mitchell's voice faintly came again.

"Teal'c! Jackson! Help!"

"I believe Colonel Mitchell is capable of taking care of himself."

"Hmm…" Daniel wasn't so sure. But he was nowhere near concerned enough, to attempt to get in the way of a furious Sam Carter.

"Sam, I'm sorry! I didn't know, I swear!"

"He's a dead man isn't he?"

"Indeed."

-fini-