The other night I was listening to a Tegan & Sara song called 'Relief Next To Me' and there are lyrics in it that say "I miss you now I guess like I should have missed you then" and as soon as I heard that line I thought of BL. So I decided to write a short one-shot BL fic. If you get a chance you all should check out 'Relief Next To Me' it's a really good song, so are all of the other Tegan & Sara songs. Anyway, I think I may write more one-shot fics soon 'cause they're easier than a multi-chaptered fic. Anyway, I'll let ya'll get to it now. - Brittany.

Summary: Brooke Realizes that she misses and loves Lucas and needs to tell him about her true feelings, but the only problem is Lucas is set to Marry Lindsey. She decides that she needs to tell him regaurdless of him marrying Lindsey. What will Lucas do when he finds out her true feelings? Will he leave Lindsey or stay with her? BL One-shot.


Deep breaths. Take deep breaths. She chanted over and over in her head. You have to do this. You know you have to do this. If you don't it will haunt you for the rest of your life. She said over and over again to herself. The rain trickled down over her as she walked up to his doorstep.

"Hey, Brooke. Come on in," he said holding the door open for me.

Once inside I took my jacket off and hung it on the coat rack. "Hey Luke."

"Lindsey's not here right now. She had to go to New York tonight to talk to a client."

I sat down on the couch and said, "Um that's fine. I'm actually here to talk to you."

He sat down in the armchair across from me with curious eyes and said, "Okay? What'd you want to talk about?"

I took a deep breath and then sat up. "Luke, I've been doing some thinking and I um, I think I may still be in love with you."

He sat there looking at me with shocked eyes. He opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out. We sat in silence then he said, "Brooke.."

"It's just I miss you now like I should have missed you then. You know that night I told you I didn't miss you anymore? It was a lie. At the time I thought it was true, but now I can't go a day without missing you. My heart has a hole where you belong and until you come back to fill it it's just going to ache and ache for you."

He still said nothing. I couldn't tell if he was thinking of the right thing to say or if he just didn't have any idea what to do.

I stood up quickly and walked toward the door. His hand caught mine quickly pulling me back.

"I've said too much. I should leave." I said in one breath.

"Brooke." was all he said.

"Yes?" I choked out.

"I um, I don't know what to say."

"It'd be nice if you could say you feel the same."

He took a deep breath and let go of my arm. That wasn't a good sign.

"Brooke, 4 and a half years ago I would have killed to hear you say those words to me. To tell me that it was all just a lie and that you really did miss me like I missed you. That you still loved me. But now, now so many things have changed. I'm marrying Lindsey."

"But you don't have to marry her." I said softly.

"Brooke, I love her."

I backed away from him and said, "Tell me one thing. How do you feel about me? Do you not feel anything like I feel for you?"

"Brooke I'll always love you. It's something that will never fade. But I'm in love with Lindsey."

"I see." I said as I began walking toward the front door to get my jacket and leave as fast as I could.

Lucas walked over to me and sighed. "Is this going to change things between us now?"

A tear rolled out of my eye. "It changes a lot, Luke."

"Are you still going to make Lindsey's dress and come to the wedding? Are we still going to be friends?"

"Luke, of course we'll still be friends. If I can't be with you at least I can have you in my life as my friend. And I made a promise to Lindsey to make her dress. I will not back out now."

Lucas touched my shoulder lightly and said, "I'm sorry about this Brooke, that we can't be together."

I wiped my tears away from my eyes so I could attempt to look a him clearly. "It's okay Lucas. I came here knowing that you most likely wouldn't feel the same. But I knew that if I didn't tell you how I felt I'd always have to live with my 'what if's' and I'd rather live with this."

"I truly am sorry Brooke."

Before I could stop myself or even think about what I was doing I leaned up and planted a kiss on Lucas' un-expecting lips. And for just one moment he responded the way I always wished he would in this moment. He put his hands in my hair and pulled my close. I closed my arms about his neck and began to kiss him feverishly. And before I knew it he pushed me away. I was panting hard trying to catch my breath as I looked up at him. His lips were now swollen from the passion of the kiss and his hair was messed a little.

"Brooke, you shouldn't have done that."

"I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me. I just had to. I just wanted to."

He looked down at me and smiled before saying, "Yeah.." then before I knew it his lips were on mine again. When the kiss broke we were both breathing heavily. "God, I can't do it. I can't marry Lindsey. Not when it feels so right to kiss you, to hold you."

I kissed his chin. "Then don't marry her. Don't do it Luke."

He kissed me again and said, "I love you Pretty Girl"

I kissed him back and said, "I've always loved you Broody. Always."