Summary – She knows he's dead, but when it comes down to it, she knows he's still here too. Deathfic, possible McShep if you squint really hard, semi-implied het. Double Drabble
Rating – PG
Disclaimer – Stargate Atlantis and all characters belong to their creators, not to me
Influence of the DeadShe knows he's dead. She went to the memorial. Watched the senior staff stand and speak of his greatness, of how many times he'd saved them and laugh with despondent humour about his arrogance and razor tongue.
But when it comes down to it, she knows he's still here.
The scientists ask themselves 'What Would McKay Do'? before starting an experiment.
Ronon and Teyla automatically check every dish for citrus, off world or otherwise.
Elizabeth turns in staff meetings to ask his opinion only to find he isn't there.
Sometimes she almost believes he might be back with them… but then she looks at John.
John, who crumbles in on himself a little more every single day that he doesn't see that crooked grin, hear him berating a scientist or have to convince him to stop making the marines cry. It's obvious it's only a matter of time before John follows him, and, what's more, no one has the heart to stop him.
Including her. They all know he's dead inside anyway.
Because when Rodney McKay died he took her lover with him.
And as wrong as it is to hate a dead man…
She knows she can't help it.