Total small one-shot of Sam's feelings from her first kiss with Freddie at the fire escape to the time when he confessed her his love with a kiss in front of the iCarly camera's. No point of view, except general I suppose. Using the song Catch Me by Demi Lovato, a cute song :3 Please continue reading and I hope you enjoy(: (Ps. I don't own iCarly)
"Just to get it over with," he assured her as Sam looked at him. Just to get it over with, she kept on repeating on her mind still looking into his eyes. Nothing more, she swore to herself and sat there; waiting for him to lean.
The kiss was nothing more, but to make it official that they've kissed someone before. To prove that they've been kissed.
But she never imagined that she was going to be as nervous as she was at the moment. She never thought that as she got closer to him, it was going to make her shake even though it wasn't cold outside. It was fresh and nice as the night lit the dark places of the world with its moon and stars.
She wanted it to be over, just to get it over with. It needed to be done, and she needed it done before she fall, too fast.
"Well, lean." The blue eyed snapped as the brunette nodded and gave her one more stare before leaning.
He leaned forward, lightly feeling her breath on him letting him know she was right in front of her.
And she didn't know why, but her stomach had flipped as she felt butterflies in her gut. Making her feel sick, yet wonderful at the same time. It was too confusing, and she kept her eyes open for a second and she kept shouting at him with her mind, kiss me quick, as his lips were still braced with her.
And then a second later it was like she automatically changed her mind, and she spoke in her mind, or make it last, as if he could read her mind.
Is was like she wanted to know how it felt to actually kiss someone because of joy feeling and not the nub that makes you want to hit him because he talks to geeky. And even tough it was only seconds, it was as if she was in that position for hours, days, years!
And she didn't want him stop, and then again she did; so she can see how badly this will hurt her, when he say goodbye.
Keep it sweet, she thought as she kissed back feeling the small tickle in her lips was soon feeling like sparkles and fireworks while the chills were warming. Keep it slow, just the way he was at the moment.
And the seconds were passing them by, and she just wanted to stay glued to his lips and scream at him to let the future pass and let it be.
And don't let go, to never let go of her like she didn't want to let go of him.
The seconds went by to soon when he lightly pulled away from her lips as she flapped her eyelashes open trying to get her vision back.
The kiss was over. The kiss was over. The kiss was over. She kept repeating in her mind.
There was no reason for her stomach to feel a bit uncomfortable, her lips weren't meeting his anymore. Her lips were far gone from his, and yet her head still felt like it was spinning in the dark. And she could still feel his lips, still taste his lips and inhale the scent of peppermint from the close up they had.
He had said something, and she agreed not knowing what he said still dozed off trying to stop the feeling in her gut.
She wanted to run away, she wanted to hide from everything and everyone, him on top of her list, but tonight she could fall to soon for the nub in front of her.
Under this beautiful moonlight that had accompany them being witness of their first kiss.
And just as she stood up crossing over, ready to leave, he called her, "I hate you." He smirked, and she couldn't help but smile. What he meant, she didn't know, but it wasn't hate.
"Hate you, too." She smiled and he nodded looking down, and she walked away before she turned and ran to him smacking more lips on him until there was no more air.
She needed to get out of there as soon as possible.
Months passed, and she tried to avoid it. The feeling inside her every time she met Benson's eyes, every time she heard his voice, every time he would smirk at her like he did right after they kissed.
But it seemed like it grew little by little each time he was around. Every time she was alone and he was the only thing she thought about. But it got even worse when Carly found out and made the whole thing come back into their minds.
Even though it constantly replayed in her mind, she didn't know if it happened to him too.
And when their best friend asked about it, it gave her the chills, especially since she was next to him. Her shoulder right next to her, touching, and she would wonder if he could feel her vibration from her angst.
The days passed and passed and it was getting worse by the second; it was as if her hear would dance when he walked in into the iCarly Studio when there was rehearsals, during the show, when celebrating with a smoothie, when seeing him first thing in the morning on school days, during classes, passing periods, lunch, after school; he was everywhere.
How could she get rid of the feelings if he around her all the time; it seemed impossible. She wanted to be next to him all the time, she wanted to feel his lips again even though the kissed had happened a long time ago, it felt like it was just last night.
That was the thing, it wasn't last night.
But he's so hypnotizing, like he was the only thing she focused on as he spoke, as Carly spoke, as anyone who was anyone spoke. She would smile when he smiled.
And it was weird, because he's got her laughing while she sang, like he was part of the melody. Like he was the reason she sang. And when Carly would ask why she would be all happy and excited.
All because he got her smiling in her sleep, and when she'll spend the night over in the mornings being the last one to wake up was a bad advantage of Carls. It was a good thing that she didn't speak why sleeping, it'll turn into chaos.
Many weeks passing by and she can see in this unraveling, it's unable to be solved.
His love is where she's falling.
But he couldn't find out, she didn't want him to find out. When he'll catch her staring at him at random moments, she would pray for her not to be caught, she would think to herself like talking to him once more like he could read her thoughts, but please don't catch me, she'll beg.
She would look down, see this heart, she would start in her mind starting a debate by herself, won't settle down; and she'll go on like that for hours.
Like a child running scared from a clown, she chuckled to herself and realized she looked like an idiot.
There would be times when he'll get close to her and ask her if she was okay since she'd been acting a little strange. Well, that he noticed at least.
And when he was that close to her, where she just had to tiptoe up and press her lips against him, that was when she'll freak. Because he was so close, but it was like she couldn't do anything.
And when he'll lean down to her trying to make eye contact when she would swear she was okay, it was just that she was terrified of what he'll do.
Kiss her?
But that was nonsense; that was silly. That was impossible. And she was right, he nodded and moved away going back to his computer and concentrate to whatever he was doing.
It was too much being in the same room as him, because her stomach screams just when she looks at him.
She wanted to scream at him to run far away, so she could breathe. Even though he's far from suffocating her, because honestly, she felt way better when she was right next to him than far.
But nothing was ever going to happen, nothing was ever going to make him and her be something more than... frienemys.
She can't set her hopes to high cause every hello ends with a goodbye.
But he's so hypnotizing; he was all she thought about. When her mom would drop her off to school, she would hum to the lyrics being sung in the radio, and her mom would stare because he got her laughing while she sang.
And when her mom would pass by and check on her, she'll scratch her head and smile as she would see her daughter smiling herself as she dreams; and all because he got her smiling in her sleep.
Then, she realized that there wasn't anything she could do, and she could see in this unraveling, her problem that couldn't be solved, that it got worse and worse.
His love is where she's falling in deeper and deeper every second of her life.
It was like she couldn't speak to him anymore, but she wanted to be with him. And there had to be ways right? To be with him and him not finding out that she has feelings for him?
"You? Want to work on a school project?"
Funny that that came from Samantha Puckett; but maybe not being alone with Freddie and tagging someone who wasn't Carly and knowing her see that something fishy was going on, could be a good way of her somewhat enjoy his presence and not be discovered.
And so it worked, he fell for it, and then he thought she fell for Brad. She thought it was funny, when he came out into the fresh air where she was sitting down thinking, and he went on about trusting your feeling.
She didn't trust her feelings, and even if she did, she'll never show them. But never's a strong word.
About going for it, about taking a risk, but somehow she didn't want him to find out. And while he stood there in front of her, she was worrying about Benson finding out, so she'll pray to herself, "-but please don't catch me."
And so now you see, well I'm scared, she would think looking at him, but he didn't know that because he couldn't read her mind like she wanted him to.
Looking at him talking, about fear, she can't open up her heart without a care, because she was terrified of it being harmed. It happened in many occasions with many situations that it seem sickening to her. She was afraid of trusting.
But something that Freddie Benson had, made her feel confident. Made her feel like she could do it; and in a stare she thought, but here I go, and in seconds before Benson could even finish saying whatever he was going to say, she smashed her lips against his.
After almost a year of longing for his lips, she pulled him to her kissing them. Just like she'll dream almost every night, and that is what she feels, and for the first time in her life she knows is real.
There was an actual meaning to everything, for just those seconds that the world was speeding up on her, not caring that she was falling behind in time and future was just rushing through her, she felt like it was okay to kiss him just because her heart was seeping up and her stomach was happy and not just because it was fed.
There was a meaning, and it felt right.
But he's so hypnotizing, and it was like he was controlling her every time she'll look into his eyes.
When she parted from his lips, she could still feel his lips on her. And then she once again, came back to reality and felt like a fool; because she kissed him, because she let her feeling go, because she trusted her heart and gut.
And what do Puckett's do best?
Run away.
That's what she did; she ran away from her fears, from her problem which was the nub she had left behind. She felt dumb and stupid and just pitiful from the way he looked at her.
Amazed? Shocked? Scared? Terrified?
She felt crazy, insane, like she lost her mind, all sense of what her meaning is anymore. She didn't know her meaning, and felt crazy. She did talk to herself, about her feelings for Benson, instead of talking to some like Carly that was rational.
So she went where she thought she belonged, Troubled Waters Mental Hospital. Maybe clear her mind if no one knows where she is, as she hides from her world and thinks about what she did and if she really honestly had feelings for the nub.
And she thought about it, why he was the reason that he got her laughing while she sang to all the songs they'll listen to. Or why he got her smiling in her sleep and never wants to wake from her dream where everything made sense.
She couldn't figure out her problem, and she could see in this unraveling that she wasn't figuring out anything that could help her, but that she was in love with Fredward Benson. His love is where she'd fallen, but she still begged as she laid on her hospital bed, "So please don't catch me," in small whispered looking at the bare wall.
Three days later, he found her asking her to explain. But how was she supposed to explain something that didn't even make sense with her?
And then, when there she was rattling on about getting her back in rejection by all the things she'd done to him, he shut her straight up with a kiss.
The kiss she wanted to taste even after kissing him and seeing that it didn't make sense.
His hands on her waist, pulling her closer as she closed her eyes, her arms resting on him, taking advantage of it and enjoying it, because she didn't know if it was going to be the last one, or at least until she got another one months after.
And when she pulled apart, she looked at him, and wonder, if this is love, as she stared into his goodness of brown eyes, please don't break it.
But even though she was scared of not making sense, of not being like every other cliché', of being just the exact opposite of everyone else around them because the bully fell in love with its victim, she didn't care.
She didn't care what other people had to say, as long as her nub was with her, she was alright.
She looked at him, mirroring his smirk, with shining blue eyes that made diamonds look worthless. He reached down for another kiss, and there it was in her stomach. The flipping and small shivers when his skin makes contact with hers.
"I'm giving up, so just catch me." she smirked.
So this was it! Please tell me what you think by reviewing, and remember, if you want to request a song fic, totally up to it! :D i hoped you enjoyed it(: [sorry if any mistakes]