A/N: This is my first fic, so, just be honest. I own nothing.

When Parker was born, Christmas became my favorite time of year. He would always get the morning with Rebecca, but then we could spend the rest of the day together. We would have everything planned out on the 23rd; cookies chosen, stockings hung, the works.

Then I met Bones. Then I fell in love with her.

I could never tell you when it happend. It just grew to a point where I couldn't lie to myself anymore. Then, it was Christmas and I gave her the chance to spend the holiday with her family. And I got mine. I dropped Parker off in Vermont with a smile on my face. Then, on my way home, it hit me.

Sure, I'd spent the day with my son, one of the only things I think I may ever do half right. All else seems a disappointment. That's how I came to this conclusion.

While I will always love Parker, its different with Bones. She makes me feel whole. Parker is a literal part of me. He came from me. But Bones...she is my other half.

With the silence screaming at my reeling brain, the radio seemed to be a safe solution. I was mistaken. Song after song after song. You'd think that since it was Christmas maybe they'd play actaul Christmas music. They must know that everyone who's alone on this holiday hates it. They must know we have nothing better to do than drive around and order take-out. Although I let on that I am Christmas' number one fan, I also told Bones that it's okay to lie at Christmas-- what I didn't say is that I frequently lie to myself.

I would have put in a CD, but spending every moment in my car with someone who can't listen to a single genred radio station, means a wide variety of her favorite CDs. Which I might say is ... well varied. So, classic rock station it is. It's the music that sibngle losers who never have dates on Valentines Day listen to.

Albeit good music, it only helps you think. Plays out the story of the song in your mind.

So as Pink Floyd's Wish You Were Here finished up John Waite's Missing You came on. Have you ever listened to that song. Shit, was I ever in trouble.

Peru, Bones was in Peru. I could call her, say Happy Holidays. Ask her what was up. She would say she was busy. What if she didn't answer her phone. She was working for National Geographic. She would never have time for me.

And theres a storm thats raging
Through my frozen heart tonight
I aint missing you at all
Since youve been gone
Away
I aint missing you
No matter
What my friends say

Wow, do I ever hate the radio. Whoever that guy was missing, I sure as hope he had more guts that I do.

This is going to be a hell of a long drive home.