AN: I'm really nervous about this story being OOC or just plain unrealistic. I'd really appreciate some feedback if at all possible. I love my readers!
The One Who Knew Him Best
This story is for Jibbsgal1 because it was inspired by a conversation with her. :)
She was an idiot. Hollis Mann wasn't typically one to lie awake at night reprimanding herself—especially after great sex—but she had really, really screwed up. Hadn't Director Shepard warned her that something was off? And yet she hadn't listened. Hollis should have realized the Director knew what she talking about. She didn't know the details, but there was obviously some history between those two. It was logical that they had worked together; in their line of work partners often grew close. NCIS was a small agency, it was probably tight-knit. It seemed to Hollis that there was another level of closeness there, the exact nature of which was still unknown. But whatever the bond, it provided Director Shepard with great insight into the man's life, and it was almost certainly mutual.
Hollis breathed a discontented sigh and glanced over at the man sleeping next to her. She was with him now, and she'd wanted that, but she couldn't help but feel vaguely uneasy. She had failed to notice the changes, failed to protect him sooner, failed even the simple request of watching over him. Director Shepard had handed the reigns to Hollis, knowing that she cared about Gibbs and trusting her to take care of him, and Hollis had completely blown her off. Director Shepard was obviously not completely comfortable with the developing relationship between Jethro and Hollis, but she had been the better person and shared her concern, keeping a quiet distance. The Director could easily have exploited the situation to push Hollis farther away, but she hadn't done it. Hollis had never stopped to say thank you, or considered what the other woman had to say. She felt so guilty. Who, after all, had turned out to be right?
The next morning, Hollis had made her decision. She needed to talk to the Director of NCIS. She managed to clear a couple hours in the morning where she could slip out, giving her adequate time to get to the other building. She arrived at 1000 hours, noting the absence of Jethro and his team as she walked past. They were probably out working a case, thank God. How awkward would it have been if she'd run into him here? He'd left early, before she was awake, but that was hardly surprising. Jethro Gibbs was an unusual man and it was going to take more than one night of a relationship to train him in the art of not disappearing.
Hollis ascended the stairs without looking out of place. After all, she was Army CID, she had plenty of legitimate, innocent, and less-than-embarrassing reasons to be in the building of another military investigative agency. She was polite to the Director's secretary, a pleasant-seeming young woman named Cynthia, and easily managed to gain an audience with the Director who was currently experiencing a convenient lull in activity.
"Lieutenant-Colonel," Jenny remarked pleasantly. "I wasn't expecting you. You wanted to speak with me?" As Hollis followed Jenny into her well-furnished office the redhead closed the door behind them. Both women seated themselves at the table.
"Yes, Director. What I wanted to discuss... well... it's a little bit more personal than a case. But it's very important to me and I feel that it needs to be said." Jenny looked at her with interest, still not entirely out of "professional" mode.
"Go on," she nodded.
"Yesterday. There was the case, with the terrorist, and the... the BZ gas." Jenny, seeming to realize what this was about, sat up a little straighter.
"You realized something was wrong with Jethro, you were the only one, and instead of taking advantage of that... instead of holding that over me, you asked me to keep an eye on him." Hollis paused, searching for the right words.
"You told me about your concerns so I could help him. And I completely blew you off. You were right, all along, and I feel like an idiot for not listening to you in the first place. I'm sorry." Hollis had barely finished her apology when Jenny's body language interrupted her.
"Never apologize, it's a sign of weakness."
"Is that your philosophy, Director?"
"Please. It's Jenny. And no, that one I learned from Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs. It's rule number six, you know." Hollis shook her head. Jethro and his crazy rules.
"It just doesn't feel right, you know? I'm the one that's supposed to understand him, but you know him so much better than I do."
"Colonel," Jenny began gently.
"Hollis," she interrupted.
"Hollis. There are only about two people alive who know Gibbs better than I do. Of those two people, one of them doesn't necessarily see him on a regular basis. I'm not trying to sing my own praises, the truth is it's sometimes less a blessing than a curse." Hollis looked at the other woman intently.
"You really care about him, don't you?" Jenny looked away, unable to maintain eye contact. "Does he care about you?" Jenny sighed: a noise of pure sadness, regret, and grief.
"He might have, once." Hollis fell silent for a moment, then spoke up.
"Jenny, it's not right. You know him so much better than I do. You're the one who should be with him." Jenny gave a sort of melancholy half-laugh.
"Oh, Hollis. He doesn't want me. What he does want is you. And you want him. The two of you deserve to be happy."
"You deserve to be happy, too," Hollis pointed out sadly.
"Maybe. But not at his expense."
After Jenny spoke the two women simply stared at each other in silence for several minutes. Eventually, Hollis stood to leave. Jenny, always politically well-mannered, immediately showed her unexpected guest to the door. As she entered the doorway, the Lieutenant-Colonel turned around to speak once more.
"Director...Jenny...thank you." And the next moment, the strawberry-blonde was gone. Jenny smiled to herself as her eyes followed Jethro's new girlfriend down the stairs and all the way to the elevator, not for one moment missing the subtlety and double-meaning to the woman's words.
The conversation was never spoken of again, nor was any part of it repeated. Jethro never knew it had happened, and neither Jenny nor Hollis ever made reference to the familiarity and confidence they had so briefly shared. Later, when he didn't call, Hollis tried not to worry about it. After all, there was one thought she had not voiced in her strange conversation with the red-haired Director of NCIS. There was a way he looked at her, and a way he looked at Jenny. Jenny could say what she would, but Hollis would always know that while Jethro may want her, the one he wanted more was the one who knew him best. When a case eventually brought them together again, most of these thoughts were relegated to the dark, dusty corners of Hollis' mind as she found joy in her new relationship with Leroy Jethro Gibbs. There was nothing for anyone to feel guilty for, Jenny had set him free to do as he wished.
But she still was, and always would be, the one who knew him best.
AN: Bonus points if you know which "two people" I'm thinking of!