Why Do I Love Her?

A/N: Once again, we visit the world of Enough and Closure. This is set a few years in the future. I wrote all I wanted to say in those two fics but I wanted to do a normal fic instead of a sad one. On with it.

Disclaimer: Same old thing. The characters belong to Joss Whedon and all the parties involved in airing the show.

Feedback: As you wish.

---------------------------------------

I am a vampire.

I am a monster.

I have killed millions and felt no remorse about it.

I still don't.

I am that which the world fears.

But she doesn't.

She trusts me.

She loves me.

I have her life in my hands and she doesn't even know it.

She believes in me.

I am the proud owner of her faith.

I look at her, lying on top of me while I rest on my bed. Holding me even in her sleep.

I hug her back.

I know why she loves me. I do.

She loves me because I am here, holding her.

But why do I love her?

There are a million and one reasons.

I love her eyes. The way she looks up and scrunches her nose because the sun hurt those lovely eyes.

I love her hair. It shines when said sun touches her and makes her glow. Like an angel.

I love her scent. Fresh and always clean. The sweet perfume that means home to me.

I love her voice. How she talks to me and relates her days and nights. How she comes to me and tells me about something new she discovered or learnt.

I love her skin. Smooth, lovely and tender, soft around my neck when she hugs me.

I love everything about her. The sweet sound of her heartbeat, thumping strong against my eardrums. The sound that makes me forget all those years of anger and pain. The sound that makes me forget I'm a monster and reminds me that she loves me and that I have faith in her.

I love her.

And I will always love her.

She stirs a bit and tries to make herself comfortable. I loosen my grip a bit and she cuddles in closer. I caress her hair and try to imprint this in my memory. Years will go by and I know that she was only lent to me for a while. Sooner or later she'll leave my side and I will watch in amazement how this glorious and beautiful creature leaves my side.

Because that's the way it's supposed to happen.

It's funny that I recall this, but I remember something my own father told me over a hundred years ago.

'Children are borrowed, my son, when the time comes, we have to let them go.'

I believe him, now that I have my daughter wrapped around me.

I love her. I've already said that. I hug her even more in her sleep, and I know that her mother will scold me when she comes back. Buffy says that I will smother her or will take all her breath. She'll scold me upon returning from patrol and'll say that I am overprotective and will spoil her.

I don't care. I can't take her breath. I don't breathe.

I look again at the angel on top of me and smile.

Creatures like me were not supposed to have this bliss. This miracle.

But I have her. My angel. My life.

My daughter.

It was only fair that we named her after the other woman both her mum and I loved.

Joyce.

I think I see her grandmother smiling at me through her eyes. Or when she makes a drawing of a vampire (more accurately, a bat) and shows it to me as if it was the greatest picture ever drawn.

To me it is.

Because she made it. For me.

Even her mum laughs at this, and calls me her 'overgrown bat'.

I don't care, I also love her mother with all my heart.

Buffy is my soul, but Joyce is my life.

Why do I love her?

Because she's part of Buffy.

Because she's part of me.

Because she's us.

-----------------------------------------------------