Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters I'm working with. They belong to George Lucas.
Summary: Did Obi wan ever actually learn to communicate with Qui-gon?
Authors Note: This will be my first story ever that is more than one post long! That being said I don't know how often updates will come but they will be fairly frequent.Obi-wan was devastated.
What did a person do when all the light in the universe seemed to have been brutally extinguished? His "brother" was as good as dead, his surrogate family had disappeared, and his life had all around been lifted up, shredded, and thrown back down around his ears.
Where had he gone wrong?
Was Anakin, no, Vader he corrected himself, doomed to fall or was it his own failings as a master that lead him to this?
He couldn't describe the guilt that encroached upon his very spirit. He knew that he had had a fault in Anakin's turning. What could he have done differently? Not that it mattered; he would never train another apprentice even if the Jedi Order was still intact.
His thoughts turned to young Luke, now only several weeks old. Anakin's son. Vader's son. The boy that Owen Lars had forbidden him to see, ever. So for now that solved the dilemma of Luke's training. And when the time came that they couldn't put it off any longer…who knows what might happen. As Yoda would say, "Always in motion the future is." Who knew? They could all be dead by then.
He stopped this pessimistic thought process as soon as it began. It was not wise to "what if?" the worst possible scenarios. It was not the Jedi way.
He tried desperately to remember times when things had not looked so bleak, both literally and figuratively. The sands he was looking out at starched for miles around without a break in the dull pall of the landscape.
Obi-wan remembered during the war, fighting with Anakin by his side. Those had been tumultuous times but they had always been together, side-by-side, and for what they had never doubted was the right cause. Was it the right cause now, in hindsight, who knew?
And farther back, before the war even started. Training the boy had certainly not been easy but it had always been a joy. He had been very proud of his padawan and he had loved Anakin very much even if the boy had not seen it.
And then his own apprenticeship. He had loved Qui-gon like a father. Even though his master had been undemonstrative and, to outsiders a stiff man, Obi-wan still knew, deep down, that Qui-gon had cared deeply about him.
Then possibly the most carefree times of his life had been his days in the creche rolling around with Garen, Bant, and Reeft. Those had been the most happy and most definitely silliest time of his life. Sometimes, even as a master, he had wished he was back there in his days as a youngling. Except now the creech was a bloody morgue…
He sighed and reminded himself for the umpteenth time that Jedi do not rage against what is already done and in the past.
Again his thoughts turned to his fallen, former apprentice. He wondered if what Padme had said on the brink of her death was true. "There's good in him still, Obi-wan. This I know…" Was it true? It certainly had not seemed like it when they had fought over the fiery melting pits of Mustafar. But now he risked one small shred of hope.
And then there was what Yoda had said the day the twins had been separated. He had spoken of Qui-gon learning the path to immortality. That Obi-wan could learn to commune with him via the Force. And that outlined his other thin strand of hope.
He had no idea which was more probable, Anakin possessing light or Obi-wan himself learning to communicate with the dead. However he would hold on to both ideas as they were all he had to live for aside from the tiny bundle of joy that was Anakin's legacy to the galaxy.