"If you feel like you're falling apart, fall into my arms. I promise I will catch every little piece of you and I promise I will always love your brokenness." - Anita Krizzan
Nothing could've prepared me for it. Not love stories, not romantic movies, not anything I've ever read about love. But, I honestly didn't want to believe in it.
But it happened on a Saturday.
Lilly laughed, actually, it was more of a snort. "Stop", I shoved her arm, shifting the phone particularly placed on her knee to the floor.
"I was only joking, this doesn't seem like a bad idea, look at this one!" Her pink polished finger pointed to a chisled guy at a beach, his fluffy brown hair framing his very handsome face.
Interests included: Partying, biking, surfing and guitar
"How am I supposed to just pick someone to deem 'hot'?" I sat perplexed, mostly because my best friend of ten years had convinced to me to join a dating site.
"Nova, trust me." she said, so I did.
Scrolling through pages of men was making me sick. I didn't want someone, it already made me sick when I saw Lilly and her bo macking each other's face off.
I was comfortable in my singleness. Comfortable eating chocolates solo on Valentines' Day. Comfortable spending birthdays with the parents, regardless of their irritating behavior. Whatever had made me such a sour, heart-ached teenager I was comfortable being alone.
Lilly was right in some aspects. Maybe she just didn't want me to turn out to be that old, crazy, cat lady. Perhaps she just pitied me. I sighed loudly, expressing my annoyance only earning me a squinted, tongue-out face from Lilly.
Later, as the stars were tucked into place, and the numbers on my clock turned midnight my phone screen glowed, displaying a notification.
My eyes wandered, a guy named Derrick had sent me a message. A first customer to the pitiful, empty girl such as I. Tempted to just delete the app and move on with my life I decided I should read the poor guy's message before permanently deleting him.
"Dear Nova,
What a beautiful name. Now with a beautiful name and face like yours may I ask why you would stoop to the level of a dating site?
Signed,
A Curious Admirer"
I half-smiled, immediately clicking the picture of this guy. Five pictures; one eating a giant bowl of food, another with a cute puppy in his arms, one with a younger girl, one where his arm was tucked into three other guys, and lastly one directly of his face.
His hazel eyes captured the glimmer of orange sun, and freckles dotted his face ever so lightly. Beautiful was not a proper adjective to describe him. He was fiercely ravaging, a guy with his looks shouldn't have to be on a dating site either. His short summary read, "Life's too short for explanations, people know people through laughs, cries, and everything in between."
I returned back to his message, thumbing my brain for a response.
"Dear Derrick,
A name is a name, is a name. And 'dating' is not what I want to stoop to.
From,
A Pretentious Girl"
I closed my laptop, eyes following suite.
And that was that, I thought.