Enter Hosts:
It took twelve full hours before the village was located. Twelve long, tired hours for a group of six men to find what they were searching for. From nine until nine they had marched through the seemingly endless forest. It was Stephan who finally stumbled upon the desired path. "Stupid Mapquest," he grumbled at his iphone before pocketing it.
Brian glanced at his surroundings. He had been expecting something . . . different, to say the least. When he had been told that all of the contestants would be from the same 'village,' he hadn't expected their home town to be an actual village, but he also didn't think he would be led to some place literally hidden in the leaves. Two misconceptions out of many for example: he had been offered the hosting position, but the producers had said nothing about his two co-hosts, Cole McMale and Stephan Colbear. Brian eyed his Rolex. Nine-oh-one. "Where's Hokage?" he moaned.
Cole arched an eyebrow. Peafest had a remarkably short attention span. They had been standing before the gate for no more than forty-five seconds.
"That Hokage," Ed - the executive producer - muttered at a clipboard.
Brian grimaced. "Huh??"
"The Hokage," Ed repeated and lowered his clipboard. "It's a title, not a name. And when she said she'd meet us at nine, I think she meant in the morning." He shoved his clipboard into the gaffer's arms and sighed. "I'll go find her. Now, listen very carefully, Colbear, McMale . . . yes, you too, Peafest. Don't mess this up. Wait right here, don't get into any trouble and when I come back, don't you dare say anything except for your names. Got it? We can't risk her changing her mind. So, no more than pleasantries." Ed turned on his heel and disappeared beyond the gates.
Immediately, Brian burst out, "I am so bored."
"Can it, Peafest!" Stephan ordered in his magnificent, rippling baritone.
Brian "Hurrumphed" and crossed his arms stubbornly. "I deserve respect," he barked. "Who has the most hosting experience here?"
No one responded.
"That's right, me!"
The cameraman spoke up. "That's debatable."
Instead of arguing, Brian flopped onto the ground and awaited Ed's return. The wait wasn't a long one - about fifteen minutes - but the silence made it seem much longer. Just when Cole was about to cut and run, Ed reemerged with a tall blonde at his side.
Brian was awestruck. Yet another unexpected twist for him. The Hokage was supposed to be a wrinkly old man, not a totally stacked hottie. Tsunade, on the other hand, was rather under whelmed by the lack of promise the crew thus far showed. The only impressive one out of the bunch was Stephan. Brian pushed by Cole and offered Tsunade his sweaty palm. "Brian Peafest!"
She reluctantly shook his hand. "Tsunade."
"I am Stephan Colbear, Peabody award-winning talk show host and proud American."
Tsunade was less hesitant to accept this hand.
For the second time, Cole was shoved aside and Brian took his place. "Brian Peafest," he reiterated breathlessly. His efforts went ignored as Tsunade focused on the person whom Brian had pushed away.
"I'm Cole McMale. Thanks for agreeing to Survivor."
Tsunade thought to herself for a moment before speaking again. "Are you the head of Operation Survivor?"
"Operation?" he mused. "It's just a TV show."
Enough was enough. If Cole could break the previously established rules without Ed scolding him than Brian could too. "It was my idea to cast teenagers!" he declared. "See, it's a good idea, 'cause they're just young enough to have that honest innocence that makes them trust others, but they're old enough to have those raging hormones that make them moody and easily offended. Doesn't that sound like fun?" -wink- "And they got new and improved hosts," he stated joyously while Ed massaged and shook his head. "Well, host," he added to Tsunade in a whisper.
Tsunade crossed her arms tightly beneath her chest. "So, you're going to be exploiting my ninja? I was under the impression - because this is what I was told - that this was a survival training exercise."
"Ninja!?" Stephan's eyes grew wide, and he peered at Cole. "She said ninja!"
Frankly, Brian was stumped by this development. "Ninja?"
"Ninja. Hmm . . ." Cole mused.
A grin spread across Stephan's face. "This show is going to . . . rock!" He held out both of his fists to Cole who, in turn, reluctantly 'tickled the stones' until Tsunade cleared her throat loudly.
"Oh," Cole muttered quietly, "right. I guess you could say that we were taking advantage of them. . . ."
Tsunade's brow furrowed and Ed released a disgruntled growl.
"But we're paying you," Cole replied defensively. "You in or not?"
Ed looked at Tsunade hopefully from behind his fingers. He knew that while Cole was a jerk on T.V., in reality, he was generally relatively congenial, not to mention persuasive. A few moments passed in silence while Tsunade contemplated in silence. Suddenly, she smiled.
"All right!" she exclaimed.