Now you're gone

"Hi Padfoot, Moony." said James as he entered his friends' apartment.

"Hi Prongs." they said at the same time, not looking up from the things they were doing.

"What's up?" asked Remus as he raised his head to look at James.

"Lily and I got in a fight." said James sadly.

"So? It's not like you guys never fight. She'll beg you to come back in an hour or two." said Sirius still looking at his newpaper.

"Padfoot!" hissed Remus as he saw James face fall. Sirius looked at him with a look of confusion on his face.

"I don't think so, it was worse than usual." said James depressed.

"Oh." said Sirius, comprehension dawning on his face. "How much worse?"

"We're getting a divorce."

"What?!" they said loudly.

"Yeah, that bad."


I realize my love for you was strong

And I miss you here, now you're gone

"But, what are you going to do, I mean, do you hate her now, I dunno, like, stopped to love her? Why are you guys getting divorced? Come on, you guys were getting along so well." asked Sirius.

"I dunno either, I mean, I still love her and I already miss her. What am I going to do? And, uh, can I stay here tonight?"

"Sure, let the night pass and maybe you can talk to her tomorrow and see if it gets better." said Remus.

"So what happened?"

"I don't really remember, Lily has been kinda acting weird lately. She's happy one second and then crying the next, to be really mad at me another second later."

I keep waiting here by the phone

Remus stared knowingly at James. He had a little idea of what was happening inside Lily's head.

"You know James, I'm sure she'll write you telling that she regrets everything she said and beg you to come back. That's what you do, why wouldn't she do it?"

James sighed, his friend could really be stupid sometimes. "You didn't see her face when she asked for a divorce. And I, being the prat that I am, I said fine." James put his face in his hands. He just hoped Lily would indeed forgive him and owl him to say she was sorry. It was her turn to say she was sorry, it was all her fault this time, for once, thought James.

With your pictures hanging on the wall

He looked around, Remus and Sirius seemed unsure of what to say. His gaze then fell on a picture of Lily and him kissing under their favorite tree. Sirius had taken that as a joke but it was now hung up on his and Remus' apartment wall.

James sighed once more, how could he have let her go?


Now you're gone

Lily burst into Alice and Frank's house crying.

"Lily! What's wrong?"

"It's over. James and I are getting divorced!" bawled Lily.

"Divorce? That can't be, you guys were so happy just yesterday!" said Frank confusedly.

"Frank." warned Alice.

"Okay, I'll go see if someone needs me in the study or something." said Frank dejectedly. He walked out of the parlor and let Alice comfort Lily.


I realize my love for you was strong

And I miss you here, now you're gone

Alice let Lily cry on her shoulder for a couple of moments. When her breathing steadied, Alice asked, "Are you going to tell me what happened?"

"I don't even remember now. All I do remember is that I started screaming at him and finally yelled that I wanted a divorce and he said fine and left. Now, here I am, crying my eyes out for the perfect guy for me. Why did I say that, I love him, it's not what I meant, no?"

"I hope not! But what are you going to do?"

I keep waiting here by the phone

"I don't really know, wait for him to owl me, begging me to come back, that's what he usually does. He is the one who agreed to divorce, he's the one who has to say sorry, once again." said Lily.

Alice frowned, if James was thinking the same thing, Lily would still be crying in six months, those two could be really stubborn sometimes.

"That's a good idea." agreed Alice being the good friend she was. "What are you going to do for now though?"

"Can I stay here for the night? I don't want to see him at home."

Frank reentered, thinking that it was safe to come back. "Sure you can stay, as long as you have to."

Lily cried again, could it take that long? Alice glared at Frank who looked confused.

"What?" he mouthed to his wife. Alice shook her head and motioned him to leave.


With your pictures hanging on the wall

Lily calmed down once again and looked up from Alice's shoulder. Her gaze fell directly to a picture of her and James arm in arm at the end of their seventh year. She got up and slammed the picture face down so they wouldn't be staring at her anymore.


Is this the way it's meant to be

James got up and went to lie down on the sofa. Remus and Sirius followed him and sat on the armrests.

"So is this how it's going to be?" asked Sirius. "All three of us, Bachelors, living in the same dingy apartment?"


Only dreaming that you're missing me

"I hope not!" exclaimed James.

Remus rolled his eyes. "Padfoot, you're not helping here."

"I hope that I see her soon and that she'll jump into my arms saying how sorry she is. Well, I mostly hope that she realizes how much I miss her."

"In your dreams Potter." said Sirius mimicking a fifth year Lily. He then burst out laughing.

James smiled a little at the memories.


I'm waiting here at home

The day drawled on, Remus and Sirius trying to cheer up James by getting him to forget a little about Lily.

"Guys, it's not worth it, I'll never forget her."

"We can at least try, it's better than seeing you sulking on our sofa, hoping she'll crash into our apartment to snog you like crazy." Sirius said. Remus laughed, Sirius really had his way with words sometimes. Even James smiled a little.


I'll go crazy, now you're gone

"Ya know what will really make you forget Lily? Quidditch." said Remus.

"Moony, that isn't a bad idea! Prongs, come on, grab your br- no, scratch that, we do not want to encounter a certain redhead today, grab my spare broom and we'll head down to the nearest pitch." Sirius said.

They grabbed their brooms and headed to the nearest pitch. They played for a couple hours but Remus and Sirius noticed that James wasn't really into it.

"Prongs! Come on! That would've been a good shot!" shouted Sirius.

"Prongs, don't tell me she's still in your head after two hours of Quidditch!" said Remus.

"Sorry, this is driving me crazy! Everything reminds me of her, even Quidditch although she hates it!"

Sirius and Remus rolled their eyes and sighed, it was no use.


There's an empty place in my heart
Without my Anna it will break apart
It wont heal it never fades away

They went back to the apartment and sat around the kitchen table.

"So… what are we going to eat, I'm starving."

"Padfoot, you always think of your stomach."

"I'm not hungry, my broken heart aches too much." said James.

"Prongs, come on! That is such a sissy excuse!"

"Thanks Padfoot!" said James sarcastically. "I don't think I'll ever be as happy as I was with Lily."

"Here he goes again." said Sirius. Remus hit him on the back of the head. "Ow! What was that for!"

"To shut you up, can't you see our friend is in pain!"

"I think I'm going to turn in." His friends could really be great sometimes, but today, they were no use.

"Hey Prongs, sorry we couldn't cheer you up."

"No problem Moony, you did what you could do."


I will think about you everyday

James went to bed thinking of Lily, he fell asleep thinking of Lily and his dreams were filled with Lily.

He woke up the next morning slightly forgetting why he was in his friends' apartment. Then it hit him, Lily had left him. Still thinking of her, he went to breakfast.

"So, what are you going to do today Prongs?" asked Remus when he saw James come in.

"Get Lily back." Remus eyebrows shot up.

"That's the spirit Prongs! Sweep her off her feet!"

Now you're gone

Lily stomped back to the couch and huffed. Then she started crying again. Alice sighed.

"He's gone Alice, he really is. I don't know what took me! I'm happy one minute, then sad the next and I can scream my head off a second later."

Something lit up it Alice's face. "I think I now what you have, let's go to St Mungo's!"

"St. Mungo's? But I'm not sick Alice!"

"I know, but, you'll see. Frank! We're going to St. Mungo's! We should be back in about an hour!" Alice called out to Frank.

"Okay! See you later! Wait. St Mungo's?" But he didn't have an answer, they were already gone.


I realize my love for you was strong
And I miss you here now you're gone

Lily and Alice arrived at St. Mungo's shortly after. Alice took Lily's hand and led her to the front desk.

"Hi, I'd like my friend to take a pregnancy test." said Alice quickly. Lily gasped and her eyes widened, she stared at Alice, stunned.

"Sure, what's your name?"

"Her name's Lily Potter."

"Not for long." whispered Lily to herself. Alice, having had heard her, rolled her eyes.

"Don't think that and if my presumptions are true, you will have to tell him."

"You're right, I can't do this without him. Merlin, it hasn't been a day yet and I already miss him." said Lily sadly.


I keep waiting here by the phone

They went to the waiting room and a Healer joined them shortly after. They all went into a small examination room and the Healer told Lily to lie down and bring her shirt up a little. With the tip of her wand, the Healer scanned Lily's belly. After a while, golden sparks emitted from the Healer's wand.

"Congratulations Mrs Potter! You are pregnant." said the Healer. She then left the room to fill up some papers. Lily couldn't believe it, she was now getting divorced and pregnant with her soon-to-be ex-husband's child. She started crying again, if only he would owl her telling how sorry he was or something. Alice flew over to console her friend.

"Come on, let's go back home, I think you need to rest a little." Lily nodded slowly and they Apparated back home.


With your pictures hanging on the wall

Alice led Lily to her guest room that was filled with pictures of her family and friends. Lily lift up her head only to be greeted by a picture of the Marauders smiling. She cried even harder, how could he be haunting her like that? She wanted him beside her, not in pictures. Alice noticed that quickly and vanished all the pictures in the room, she could replace them later.


Is this the way its meant to be

Lily stopped crying suddenly and Alice looked at her perplexed.

"Is this how it's going to be? Me getting bigger and bigger everyday and crying harder and harder for the man that I lost forever? And this child here to remind me of all the mistakes I've done in my life, like letting James go?" she started to cry again.

"You know, I think it's not too late, you can still get him back."


Only dreaming that you're missing me

"Who says he wants me back? Maybe he is happy that I'm not there yelling after him for any stupid reason. He's probably playing Quidditch right now, not a worry on his face, not thinking of how much time he has left before I go fetch him to do something worth his time. Oh Alice, why am I this miserable?"

"Because you love him, even if you two have fights everyday for nothing, you love him. Even if he is that Quidditch fanatic that annoys you very much." explained Alice.

"You're right."


I'm waiting here at home
I'll go crazy now you're gone

"Now, sleep a little and get some rest, I'll come wake you up for dinner when it is ready. I think you need a little alone time to digest all this." she said pointing her stomach.

"Yeah, I think so too. See you later." Alice left the room and Lily lay down on the bed. She closed her eyes but a vision of James' head on a baby made her open her eyes immediately. Merlin, this is going to be hard, thought Lily. She tossed and turned on the bed for two hours before Alice came back. Lily didn't get a wink of sleep. Every time she would close her eyes, she would have a vision that made her eyes snap open.

"Had a good nap?" said Alice tentatively.

"No. I kept seeing James' head on a baby and stuff like that. Alice, I'm going crazy, I can't live without him!" said Lily.

Now you're gone

Lily went to bed that night thinking of James and the baby growing inside of her. She had to tell him about her condition. Would he take her back then? Would he want to take part of the baby's life? That would be a yes, they always said they wanted children. But that wasn't how she wanted children, she wanted them to be raised by her and James together, not separately. Lily cried herself to sleep, thinking of the man that she had let go.


I realize my love for you was strong

Lily woke up the next morning with only one idea in her head. Get. James. Back. Nothing would stop her. She skipped into the kitchen where Frank and Alice were sitting. Frank looked at her in a funny way.

"How can you be this happy after all you've been through yesterday." said Frank confused.

Lily stopped skipping and glared at Frank. He cowered near his wife.

"Don't mess with pregnant women." whispered Alice into his ear. "So, Lily, what are you going to do on this fine day?" she said cheerfully.

Lily grinned and said, "Get James back. Nothing's going to stop me."

Frank and Alice smiled, that was the Lily they knew.


And I miss you here now you're gone

"How're you going to do it Prongs?" asked Sirius.

James face fell. "I dunno Padfoot. First I have to find her, I'm pretty sure she isn't at home thinking I would be there."

"You should try at Alice and Frank's place. Lily and Alice are best friends, shouldn't you know that?" said Remus.

"Meh, hadn't come to mind yet Moony. I'll be off then."

"Hey Prongs, maybe you should eat first?" said Sirius. At that, James stomach grumbled loudly.

"You're probably right." chuckled James. He sat down, wolfed down quickly some breakfast and bolted out the door.


I keep waiting here by the phone

After eating some breakfast, Lily thought of her action plan. She would see James, say she was sorry and didn't mean anything she said and then she would tell him she was pregnant. Yep, that's the perfect plan, he's going to be wrapped around my finger after that, she thought.

Frank eyed Lily all through breakfast, scared she would burst out and stab him with his fork or something. Alice was trying to stifle her laugh as she saw her husband looking really scared of the redhead beside her. Then, Lily jumped up and Frank screamed and fell down his chair. Lily looked at him funnily.

"What's up with him?" she asked Alice.

"Oh, you don't want to know. So, where are you going?"

"I was hoping to have an owl by now, but I think I have to do the first steps. I'll go to Remus and Sirius' apartment. He's probably there."

"Okay, see ya!" Lily Apparated away.


With the pictures hanging on the wall

As soon as Lily left, another crack was heard and James appeared just beside the spot where Lily was ten seconds ago. Alice looked at him, startled.

"Is Lily here?" Then he saw Frank sprawled on the ground. "What's up with you?"

"P-" Alice hit him in the shin and glared at him. "Nothing, just startled by you arriving." James laughed, that was not the reason but he didn't ask.

"So, is Lily here?" he asked quickly.

"No, she just left." James let out a frustrated groan and turned around to see a picture of both of them on their wedding day. He sighed, "Where did she go?"

"Sirius and Remus' place." said Alice sweetly

"Right, we just missed each other huh?"

She nodded, "Yeah, she is probably still there if you hurry up." James nodded and Apparated immediately.


Is this the way it's meant to be

Two seconds after James had left, Lily appeared in Sirius and Remus' kitchen. Sirius jumped and spilled his coffee all over him.

"Damn!"

"Sirius!" said Lily shocked.

"Sorry, what are you doing here?" Remus hit him behind the head. "Yeah, I deserved that."

Lily rolled her eyes, "Is James here?"

"Sorry, you just missed him. He was standing right where you are standing five seconds ago."

"Damn!" Lily swore.

"Lily! If I can't say that, you can't either!" said Sirius jokingly.

"Uh, right. Do you know where he is?"

"At Alice and Frank's. He's probably still there if you hurry." Lily Apparated before Remus had time to finish his sentence.


Only dreaming that you're missing me

James reApparated in his friends' kitchen. Not seeing Lily he said, "Damn! Where they joking? Was she really here or they are just trying to hide her from me because she doesn't want to see me?"

"No Prongs, she was here a second ago." said Remus. "We told her you were at Alice and Frank's."

"Maybe you should go home and wait for her there. If she reappears here, we'll tell her to go home too." said Sirius.

James nodded sadly and Apparated home.


I'm waiting here at home

"Alice! Where is he?" asked Lily as soon as she Apparated. She noticed that Frank was starting to pull himself off the floor.

"He's back at Sirius'." said Frank grudgingly. "Could you guys stop scaring me like that!"

Lily rolled her eyes and sighed. "Was he really here for me?"

"Yes Lily, he's probably at home now. That's what I would've said to him if he missed you a second time by coming here. Go there, if he comes back, I'll send him there." said Alice.

Lily nodded and Apparated in her room. There was no sound or sign of movement in the house. She sighed and sat on her bed. She could wait there for a long time.


I'll go crazy now you're gone

James Apparated in the living room and flunked himself on the couch and waited for a sign of Lily. He couldn't wait to see her and tell her he loved her and didn't want to leave her.

This can take a long time, he thought. He heard some cracking sound in the distance and thought it was the cat that made something fall. Oh well, I'll repair it later, thought James. He stood up and started walking in circles, thinking of what he would tell her.

"Ugh!" he groaned frustrated. "I'll become loony if I don't see her soon. What is taking her so long?"


There's an empty place in my heart

"Argh!" exclaimed Lily. What could take him so long! Sirius probably said the same thing to him that Alice had said to her, but why wasn't he there yet?

All of a sudden, her stomach gave a funny lurch. Crap, thought Lily. She ran to the bathroom and gave up her breakfast.

"Great timing baby." she said sarcastically. Then her heart sank, James still didn't know yet. She flushed the toilet and rinsed her mouth at the sink. When she turned around, she saw the man of her dreams looking at her worriedly.


Without my Anna it will break apart

James continued to pace around the parlor. Then, he heard some footsteps running upstairs and some retching. That was not the cat, thought James. He started going up the stairs slowly as he heard the toilet flush.

"Could it be Lily?" he whispered quietly, hoping it really was her. He just couldn't live without her, even if she was sick at the moment. He turned and stood in the doorway of their bathroom. When he saw her he looked worried, but he would've hugged her immediately if he knew how she really felt.


It won't heal, it never fades away

"James." breathed Lily.

"Lils, I've got to say I'm sor-" he started.

"No." she cut him. "I'm the one who should say I'm sorry. I shouldn't have blown off on you like that, I was mad for no reason. And, uh, I didn't mean it when I said I wanted a divorce, my feelings are pretty mushed up right now, I don't know what to think anymore. But one thing is sure, I love you."


I will think about you everyday

James couldn't have been happier when she said that. He walked up to her and hugged Lily tightly.

"You've just made my day. I love you too, very much. I couldn't stop thinking about you. I just hoped you would take me back."

Lily smiled. "I've also got something to announce you."

James frowned. "You're not going to tell me you really wanted a divorce now?" he said as he started letting go of her.

Lily started. "NO!" she screamed. "No, uh, I've got to tell you, I'm pregnant."

James smiled. That really made my day, he thought. He bent his head down and kissed her.

"I'm the happiest man on earth right now." And they held on to each other tightly for hours, thinking of how they almost lost each other.