The sun had set in Konohakagure, but there was very little to distinguish the day from the night.
Naruto looked on at the village which held first place in his heart, its beauty not ever covered by the clouds that had cast upon the land for almost the whole day. This had been the only time he stopped today, his hours spent continuously with matters he chose to deal with, for he was in no position to run when so many depended on him.
The streets below had lit up in the usual night scene, the desk emptied of paperwork told him there was no more reason to stay, the clock by his table told him that the day was done. He took a deep breath and put on his robe; the symbol of the only thing he now had: his dream.
His quickest route was to teleport himself to his own front door; the longest was to walk around the streets. He did not know what brought his feet to motion, and as to why his hands did not manage to clasp themselves together to form the seals that would bring him home, he did not know. Inside of him was a vice, gripping his chest, and a feeling of drowning in his own air. His feet walked, bringing him anywhere, or nowhere.
Head bent low, he became faintly aware of voices calling him.
Hokage-sama.
Hokage-sama.
And yet he walked on, ignoring the cheerful cries of people who were happy to see him. His feet dragged him, away from the people who loved him, away from the people he loved in return. Because he did not know where he was going, nor did he have the strength to smile and wave, and for once in his life, he did not want to be himself.
The ground he walked on had changed, with only the dust blowing on his toes telling him that he had stepped away from the streets, and into a place he was sure he could be alone. Only the faint creaking sound of the playground swing broke him from his trance. He raised his head, the sight bringing his feet to a standstill, the realization like a bucket of ice water over his head.
"Naruto…"
Sakura slowly stood from the swing, her eyes locked on his for a brief moment, before she looked down, hands never leaving the metal chains.
If there was any woman in the world closest to him, it was her; twenty three year old medic nin, bright green eyes, creamy white skin, waist-length pink hair, beauty unrivaled with the smile that was his greatest weakness, a strength of a hundred, compassion of a thousand – this woman: the only queen of his heart.
His whole being ached, and though he wished he was someplace else, his feet stepped and brought him closer, till he stood next to her, and took a seat.
"Hey," he whispered, afraid to turn his gaze. It wasn't like the other times they sat on this swing.
"Hey."
The sky was darker now, with the clouds rolling in from some place, and the cold wind blowing, mirroring his deepest thoughts. They said nothing for a while and just sat there, letting their silence simmer in between.
"How was your day?" he heard her ask. There was a fear of not being able to respond, it wasn't only her voice that was making him weak.
"It was fine. Sasuke came by this morning," he blurted out, not meaning to. He heard her feet kick at the ground and he could now see her hair sway with the wind from his line of sight. With every breath, her strawberry scented shampoo filled his nostrils, eating away his composure.
She did not reply, instead she concentrated on the sound of the metal chains creak with each push that her kick gave, higher and higher from the ground. There were many things she wanted to hear.
"He was really excited y'know. I've never seen him so… overjoyed."
"Really…"
You were everything to me, Sakura-chan.
"Yeah, he had that dazed smile plastered on his face and he was so excited to tell me…"
I should have told you sooner.
"He… he wanted it big and grand and I… I could understand that."
It hurts me now and I won't stop hurting, but…
"You would make a very beautiful Uchiha."
His own words had stung him in a way that he didn't intend, the painful reality beginning to rip away his confidence. He had been watching from a distance for some time now, and whatever happened in between was his doing, because he merely watched knowing what was to come, because he knew what it was like to be at the mercy of her beautiful green eyes, and he knew that to fall for her was to never stop falling.
Her heels dug the ground, halting her momentum; the light dust dispersing at her feet. He could not bear to look at her anymore, not even through his peripheral vision, as a new kind of pain began to spread out, like the blood that pumped inside his chest.
He found it hard to stand from the swing, because his own heart was a different weight from the rest of his body, but he managed it and walked slowly just as the first drops of rain fell from the sky. He wanted to walk back to her and shield her from the rain, to protect her from anything and everything; he wanted to be the one, but her silence was killing him, and he had nothing to hang on to, not even a shadow of a dream.
"Naruto-"
"I can't stay here, Sakura. Goodbye."
Finally his hands had done what he couldn't earlier. A few seals and a quick step and he stood, dripping wet on the carpet of his living room, sheltered from the rain outside, but not protected from the rain that was his own tears as he fell on his knees.
I wish I didn't have to give you up.
Because I still love you.
I will always love you.