Hello Death Note fans X3 I have nothing to say except one very important thing...

WARNING: MAY HAVE SPOILERS FROM THE LOS ANGELES BB MURDER CASES DEPENDING ON HOW YOU LOOK AT IT

Also, I'm terribly sorry if it sucks. I'm not really good at starting a story. I usually come up with an idea that requires a lot of explaining and chapters...

Review afterwards?

~Jay

Every single punch I threw, every single body I cut, was all his fault. If he hadn't done this to me, they wouldn't have to suffer. I am broken because of him.

It's all Lawli's fault.

*Flashback*

(1985)

I scowled at the floor below me as I walked down the halls. I heard the teasing laughter, I felt the papers they threw, I tasted the bitterness all of the abuse left on my tongue.

By them, I mean the Wammy's house kids.

My name is Beyond Birthday, or BB. I'm 8 years old and known as the freak around here. I hate it!

I slammed my room door shut and threw my backpack across the room. I clenched my teeth together in anger to stop myself from screaming.

They know I can't do anything to them. If I try to fight back and defend myself, they tell Roger or Watari. Then, I'm the one who gets in trouble. It's so stupid! I hate this place!

I took the knife I kept on my dresser and threw it. I just threw it, not caring where it landed.

"AHHHHHHHH!" I finally screamed then kicked and punched my door with all my might. "ASSHOLES! ALL OF THEM ARE ASSHOLES!" I continued to yell and abuse my poor door.

After about 30 minutes of kicking, punching, and yelling, I gave up and sat on my bed. I glared daggers at the floor imagining ripping all of their throats out and making them suffer. The sound of a door opening interrupted my violent thoughts.

I looked up and widened my eyes.

A little boy (Whom I've never seen before) came in and stared emotionlessly at me. He looked like an exact replica of me! He had messy black hair, wore baggy jeans and a baggy, white long sleeved t-shirt, and had dark empty eyes.

"Hello there. I am L." He said bluntly before tossing his stuff on the extra bed in the room. I continued to stare at him and out of habit looked above his head.

Did I mention that I can see a persons name and their remaining lifespan? Well, I can. It's all floating right above their heads.

L. Lawliet, 1056789235 were his numbers. I never really understood the numbers, but I found out that when it reaches zero that person dies. My previous friend, A, had only 1847 to live when I met him. A few months later, when the number reached zero, he committed suicide. From then on, I continued to look at a persons name and lifespan to see if it was near zero.

Anyways, as I continued to stare above his head, he looked to me weirdly.

"Is there something above me or something?" He asked in a monotonous voice. I snapped out of my thoughts and shook my head no.

"No, nothing Lawli." I said. He narrowed his eyes at me.

"Lawli? Where'd you get that from?" L asked suspiciously. Oh yeah, he doesn't know yet...

I jumped off my bed and faced him. "You see Lawli, I can see a persons real name and their remaining lifespans just by looking above their heads. I have no idea why, I just do." I explained to him.

L just searched my face for a second before nodding. "I believe you. Is that why you have red eyes?" He asked.

I pondered that idea for a little bit before nodding slowly. It would make sense after all.

"Hey, Lawli, how old are you?" I asked randomly.

"I am 6 years old. What about you? And what is your name?" L questioned before reaching over to open his bag.

"I am 8 years old. My name is BB. What's in the bag?"

"My stuff."

"Stuff?"

"Yes, from now on, I'm going to be your roommate."

For some reason, I felt extremely happy.

(1995)

Over the years, me and Lawli-pop had gotten close. He had gotten bullied along with me, but then I had beaten them up. And for once, I never got in trouble.

When Lawli-pop had first moved in, I found out he had a random sweets obsession. I had teased him about it and started calling him Lawli-pop. To this day, he still doesn't like it.

I don't care though.

Also, when I was 10, I found out that I loved Lawli-pop, more than a friend. I started copying his moves and his speech patterns (I felt it was necessary). I had put color contacts in at one point and pretended to be my sweet Lawli-pop in front of Watari. When he found out it was really me, he freaked out and got mad at me. It was all worth it though. Then a couple months later, I found out that my Lawli-pop was the world's greatest detective! I was really pleased with him!

Those were the good old days.

Then, at the age of 15, reality came along.

After the Wammy's kids got used to having another freak around, some of them approached him and became friends with L. My sweet Lawli-pop, having friends other then me...

I was still isolated from others. They purposely bumped into me, they purposely ignored me, and they purposely became friends with my Lawli-pop just to get him away from me. Only when Lawli-pop stood up for me, was when they started to say sorry and fake apologizing.

Empty apologies.

At the age of 18, was when I got my heart stomped on and crushed for the first time.

Lawli-pop was finally called away from Wammy's because of L business that he refused to tell me.

"So... You won't be coming back Lawli-pop?" I remember asking.

"Nope. L is needed all over the world, so I will be traveling around the world to solve the unsolvable cases. I'm sorry BB, but you knew it was going to happen at one point." Lawli-pop said in his deep, emotionless voice as he packed up his stuff from the room where all our memories lay...

"I know, but still. I thought we were close!" I said, my voice gradually getting louder. L didn't react.

"And we still are, I just won't be in contact with you. Why are you so upset with that?"

"... Lawli-pop... Haven't you realized yet?" I hissed angrily. He was messing with my feelings! How dare he?!

For once, I saw a small little smirk. "What, the fact that you like me? Yes, I have known for quite a while actually. But, I won't let some little emotion such as love get in the way of justice BB. I'm sorry-"

"No you're not!" I shouted in hurt. My chest hurt all of a sudden...

Lawli-pop closed his suitcase and faced me. "You're right. I'm not. I do like you BB, I truly do. However, I won't let my feelings get in the way of being L. I just can't afford that sacrifice." He said and grabbed his stuff.

He was about to leave, but I grabbed his wrist and yanked his fragile body towards me. No.. I won't let him go yet.

I took my knife out of my pocket and held it against his throat. Lawli-pop fell still instantly.

"Lawli-pop, how could you?" I whispered sadly and threw him on the ground. Lawli-pop glanced to me, wide eyed with fear.

"You do realize don't you? The fact that you just tore my heart out and broke it on the ground!" I screamed and threw my knife right next to his throat, making Lawli-pop hold his breath in fear.

I slowly backed away towards the window. "I can't believe this.. What happened to my sweet little Lawli-pop? Has the pressure of being L finally getting to you?" I didn't give him a chance to answer before angrily narrowing my eyes. "Well, then, if L is the world's greatest detective, B will be the world's greatest criminal. If L is a genius, then B's an extreme genius! If L is a freak, then B's an extreme freak! That's how it's been, and how it always will be!"

I opened the window and positioned myself to jump. "Alright then Lawli-pop, I'll make you pay. I don't know or care where or when, but I will be sure to see you suffer! My heart isn't something that can just be stepped on and crushed Lawliet! Soon... Soon you will feel the agony I have been feeling all my life!" I shouted before jumping out of the window, leaving a shocked and hurt L on the ground.

*End Flashback*

Even now.. I still haven't forgiven him. During the Los Angeles BB Murder Cases, I wanted him to feel the guilt at what he had done to me! He made me go from being love struck, to fucked up.

I slowly opened my blood red eyes and glared at the white wall, slightly shifting in my straightjacket.

I may have failed now, but I will definitely get my revenge. I smirked slightly.

Yes, revenge sounds nice.

Maybe that will fix my broken heart.