Bowser takes his place as The Great Destroyer
by: Scratch
Once upon a time, Bowser, our wonderful, cute, flame-breathing
koopa-villain, was having a great day. But it was going to get even better.
His favorite show, Gundam Wing, was going to be on soon, and he had been
looking forward to it for a long time. It was supposed to be a really great
episode that day. And he had stocked up on lots of coke, his very favorite
sugary drink, to have while watching Gundam Wing. It just couldn't possibly
get better, Bowser thought.
Suddenly Bowser heard the doorbell ring. He lumbered his cute little
clawed feet to the door and answered it. Who had come to call but... Toad!!!
Now let's get one thing straight: Bowser really didn't like Toad. But he knew
how much trouble he had gotten into in the past with him, so he decided for
once that he was going to be polite.
"Oh, uh, hello Toad! How nice of you to drop by! Oh, uh...
please...," Bowser stuttered. He just didn't know how to be polite to Toad.
"Come in? Well, don't mind if I do!" Toad said rudely.
"Well, er, see... that's not what I meant..." Bowser tried to cut
in, but Toad payed no attention and barged into Bowser's house.
"Got anything to drink in this ol' dump? Say, looks like there's
lots of coke over there!" Toad said.
"Well, really I was actually saving it..." said Bowser as politely
as he could.
"Aw, don't be an ol' spoilsport Bows'! Just lighten up!" Toad said,
who then grabbed the coke and poured himself a humongous glass.
"Well, really, I..." Bowser wanted to pound Toad's huge red-and-
white mushroom head in. As you could have guessed, his politeness was fading
quickly.
Bowser glanced over at the clock. It was getting close to Gundam
Wing time. Only about ten minutes until it was on. In spite of himself, he
squealed out a little roar of excitement. Then he realized Toad was still
there.
"Uh, Toad..." Bowser said, as nicely and calmly as he could, "I do
have a little work to do, so if you wouldn't mind..."
"But I haven't finished talking yet!" Toad roared.
"Oh, yes, well, please finish," Bowser said through gritted teeth.
So Toad blathered on and on about this and that, and while doing so,
poured himself glass after gigantic glass of coke. Finally, FINALLY, he said,
"Well, I guess I'm done here. I'm blowing this popsicle stand!" and ran out
the door without even saying thank you.
"Goodness, finally!" Bowser said and ran over to the kitchen to grab
some coke. But something was amiss. Bowser looked everywhere, but he couldn't
find one drop, no, not even one drop, of coke. Finally he realized what had
happened.
"That moron Toad drank all my coke! I BOUGHT 20 TWO-LITERS!!!" he
roared. "That... that... little crap-head! How could he do that to me?!"
Bowser flamed. But then he said, "Oh well. At least I can enjoy Gundam Wing,
even without coke."
He ran as fast as his thick legs could carry him to the room where
his TV was. He quickly turned it on and flipped to Cartoon Network. But to
his outrage, he saw... the credits of Gundam Wing playing!!! Bowser roared in
fury. The TV said, "That's it for Gundam Wing..." and Bowser got so mad that
he smashed the TV with his massive fist.
"NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" Bowser roared. "THAT TOAD RUINED ALL MY PLANS!!!
I'M GOING TO KILL THE LITTLE BRAT!!!"
Bowser was so upset that he ran to his room and got in bed. He was
still flaming until... he thought of something. It made him very happy. He
laughed evilly until he fell asleep.
The next morning Bowser got up bright and early. He went to Toad's
house as soon as he got up.
He finally completed the long walk to Toad's house. He knocked on
the door, and sure enough, Toad answered.
"Who is it?" Toad asked, rubbing his beady little eyes. "Oh, it's
you," he said rudely.
"Yeah, it's me," Bowser said, beginning to get outraged.
"What are you doing here? You shouldn't come this early," Toad said
beginning to get a little mad himself.
"Yes, well, you shouldn't ruin a guy's plans. Especially when they
told you not to. Especially when that guy is a huge two-ton fire-breathing
dinosaur who can kick the living snot out of you," Bowser said.
"Yeah, so you missed your little thing, or whatever you were going
to do. Who cares?" Toad said calmly.
Bowser began look at Toad. He looked at him from head to toe. From
his ugly shoes to his little white baby diaper to his horrid blue vest. And
then he moved on. Up to Toad's sickly face with his emotionless black eyes,
and finally, the worst thing about him, his big balloon-like mushroom head.
He was going to do what he had wanted to do for a long time.
He picked up Toad's puny little body in his huge scaly fist.
"Hey, what are you doing?" Toad cried.
Then Bowser, with his other hand, pulled and yanked as hard as he
could on that little disgusting mushroom head. And, well, Bowser can pull
pretty darn hard.
"NOOOOOOO!!!!!" Toad screamed, as his head, slowly and painfully,
came off.
Bowser roared with joy. He tossed Toad's head back inside his house
and then hurled the little baby body way out into the distance. He roared
some more with evil delight.
"NO ONE MAKES A FOOL OUT OF ME!!!! ESPECIALLY NOT PUNY MUSHROOMS!!!!
I AM VICTORIOUS!!!! I AM THE GREAT DESTROYER!!! THE GREAT DESTROYER OF
TOAD!!!!!!!"
And, boy, you better believe Bowser went to bed happy that night!
The End
by: Scratch
Once upon a time, Bowser, our wonderful, cute, flame-breathing
koopa-villain, was having a great day. But it was going to get even better.
His favorite show, Gundam Wing, was going to be on soon, and he had been
looking forward to it for a long time. It was supposed to be a really great
episode that day. And he had stocked up on lots of coke, his very favorite
sugary drink, to have while watching Gundam Wing. It just couldn't possibly
get better, Bowser thought.
Suddenly Bowser heard the doorbell ring. He lumbered his cute little
clawed feet to the door and answered it. Who had come to call but... Toad!!!
Now let's get one thing straight: Bowser really didn't like Toad. But he knew
how much trouble he had gotten into in the past with him, so he decided for
once that he was going to be polite.
"Oh, uh, hello Toad! How nice of you to drop by! Oh, uh...
please...," Bowser stuttered. He just didn't know how to be polite to Toad.
"Come in? Well, don't mind if I do!" Toad said rudely.
"Well, er, see... that's not what I meant..." Bowser tried to cut
in, but Toad payed no attention and barged into Bowser's house.
"Got anything to drink in this ol' dump? Say, looks like there's
lots of coke over there!" Toad said.
"Well, really I was actually saving it..." said Bowser as politely
as he could.
"Aw, don't be an ol' spoilsport Bows'! Just lighten up!" Toad said,
who then grabbed the coke and poured himself a humongous glass.
"Well, really, I..." Bowser wanted to pound Toad's huge red-and-
white mushroom head in. As you could have guessed, his politeness was fading
quickly.
Bowser glanced over at the clock. It was getting close to Gundam
Wing time. Only about ten minutes until it was on. In spite of himself, he
squealed out a little roar of excitement. Then he realized Toad was still
there.
"Uh, Toad..." Bowser said, as nicely and calmly as he could, "I do
have a little work to do, so if you wouldn't mind..."
"But I haven't finished talking yet!" Toad roared.
"Oh, yes, well, please finish," Bowser said through gritted teeth.
So Toad blathered on and on about this and that, and while doing so,
poured himself glass after gigantic glass of coke. Finally, FINALLY, he said,
"Well, I guess I'm done here. I'm blowing this popsicle stand!" and ran out
the door without even saying thank you.
"Goodness, finally!" Bowser said and ran over to the kitchen to grab
some coke. But something was amiss. Bowser looked everywhere, but he couldn't
find one drop, no, not even one drop, of coke. Finally he realized what had
happened.
"That moron Toad drank all my coke! I BOUGHT 20 TWO-LITERS!!!" he
roared. "That... that... little crap-head! How could he do that to me?!"
Bowser flamed. But then he said, "Oh well. At least I can enjoy Gundam Wing,
even without coke."
He ran as fast as his thick legs could carry him to the room where
his TV was. He quickly turned it on and flipped to Cartoon Network. But to
his outrage, he saw... the credits of Gundam Wing playing!!! Bowser roared in
fury. The TV said, "That's it for Gundam Wing..." and Bowser got so mad that
he smashed the TV with his massive fist.
"NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" Bowser roared. "THAT TOAD RUINED ALL MY PLANS!!!
I'M GOING TO KILL THE LITTLE BRAT!!!"
Bowser was so upset that he ran to his room and got in bed. He was
still flaming until... he thought of something. It made him very happy. He
laughed evilly until he fell asleep.
The next morning Bowser got up bright and early. He went to Toad's
house as soon as he got up.
He finally completed the long walk to Toad's house. He knocked on
the door, and sure enough, Toad answered.
"Who is it?" Toad asked, rubbing his beady little eyes. "Oh, it's
you," he said rudely.
"Yeah, it's me," Bowser said, beginning to get outraged.
"What are you doing here? You shouldn't come this early," Toad said
beginning to get a little mad himself.
"Yes, well, you shouldn't ruin a guy's plans. Especially when they
told you not to. Especially when that guy is a huge two-ton fire-breathing
dinosaur who can kick the living snot out of you," Bowser said.
"Yeah, so you missed your little thing, or whatever you were going
to do. Who cares?" Toad said calmly.
Bowser began look at Toad. He looked at him from head to toe. From
his ugly shoes to his little white baby diaper to his horrid blue vest. And
then he moved on. Up to Toad's sickly face with his emotionless black eyes,
and finally, the worst thing about him, his big balloon-like mushroom head.
He was going to do what he had wanted to do for a long time.
He picked up Toad's puny little body in his huge scaly fist.
"Hey, what are you doing?" Toad cried.
Then Bowser, with his other hand, pulled and yanked as hard as he
could on that little disgusting mushroom head. And, well, Bowser can pull
pretty darn hard.
"NOOOOOOO!!!!!" Toad screamed, as his head, slowly and painfully,
came off.
Bowser roared with joy. He tossed Toad's head back inside his house
and then hurled the little baby body way out into the distance. He roared
some more with evil delight.
"NO ONE MAKES A FOOL OUT OF ME!!!! ESPECIALLY NOT PUNY MUSHROOMS!!!!
I AM VICTORIOUS!!!! I AM THE GREAT DESTROYER!!! THE GREAT DESTROYER OF
TOAD!!!!!!!"
And, boy, you better believe Bowser went to bed happy that night!
The End