THE LONG GOODBYE
It was a beautiful morning. The weather forecast was just announced at the L. and they said it was going to be a sunshine day. No raining, no winds, nothing. Just the sun in the sky.
A silver Cadillac had just pulled over in front of the Certified National Bank. It was Kensi. She had decided to follow Hetty's advice and put her priceless belongings in a box in the bank. Always with a smile in the face, she entered the bank and approached an empty desk.
"Good morning", always with a smile
"Good morning. How can I help you?"
"I'm interesting in leasing a safe deposit box."
"There are some requests in life that are beyond my power. Yours happens to be one for which I am eminently qualified", the employee was trying to be helpful.
"Eminently qualified?" smiling.
"Uh, means I'll have to ask you a few personal questions."
"Well, not too personal I hope" looking at his label in his shirt "Curtis."
"Uh, just name, address and telephone number. It's essential, I promise. Just banking regulations these days. You know how it is."
"Yeah."
They were interrupted by a gun-shot. Three armed men wearing ski masks entered the bank, punched the security man and started yelling. "Nobody move! Everyone who works here at the back and the rest of you on the ground, now!"
Kensi, trying to be brave, hit one of the robbers and he felt down. At the same time and as fast as she could, she got up and pulled her gun out. "Federal agent! Drop your weapons!". But the guy who was on the floor, kicked her hand and as a result she dropped her gun. The guy got up and fought with Kensi. He grabbed her from the neck. She took his mask off and hit him in the face with her elbow. Then he punched her in the face and took her gun from the floor.
"Wrong move lady." he said.
"Johnnie, Johnnie no!" another said.
"Please don't!" Kensi said now more scared than she was before. But he didn't stop and he shot her; three times in the chest. She fell down. She was barely breathing. All the other clients were scared, thinking one of them might be the next one.
Back in the office, Sam was sitting in his desk and Deeks was about to with a cup of coffee in his hand. G was absent and late for work. No one knew what had happened this morning.
"It's 10 o'clock in the morning. You know where your partner is?" Deeks asked his co-worker. Basically he wanted to start a conversation. He hadn't actually spoken for 20 minutes.
"I would ask you the same thing."
"Well, if you must know, I know where she is. I called her earlier today, asked her if she wanted to grab a coffee before work but she said she had work to do in the bank. And she is at the bank as we speak."
"Good for you to know where your partner is Deeks." Deeks was staring at Sam for a few seconds.
"You didn't answer my question."
"Deeks, G is fine. I could say he is more than fine."
"Am I missing something?" He was obviously missing something.
"G had a date with Joelle last night. You get the picture."
"Oh, I get the picture. Downloading now. Delete, delete. Save. Clear history."
"The boys were laughing. They were happy with Callen finally making up his life and finding a girlfriend. Thanks to Sam of course.
"Gentlemen, may I have your attention?" Sam knew from the tone of her voice that something was going on. And he asked her. "What's going on Hetty?"
"Mr. Hanna call your partner and tell him to came here ASAP and go in Ops. Ms Jones and Mr. Beale will brief you."
"Okay." And he made his way to the Ops.
"Mr. Deeks. I'm afraid I have some bad news."
"What's going on?" Now he had understood that something was wrong.
"Kensi has been shot. And unfortunately, she didn't make it. She died before the ambulance arrived."
"No, no, no. She wouldn't leave like that, right?"
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
"How? When? Where?" So many questions that needed answers. Though the perennial one was who did it. In that case, there were three. And they knew one of them. They had his face and his first name. "Where is she?" he asked Hetty with tears in his eyes. "In the morgue. I have already called Ms Schwartz and told her not to begin the autopsy before you and her mother arrive."
"How am I going to tell her that? How?" he took his car keys and left.
Back in Ops, Eric and Nell were briefing Sam and Granger.
"She walked in, a few minutes later three armed men. Kensi fought with one of them. Took off his mask."
"Do you have a name?" the assistant director asked with a serious tone in his voice. "Yes, we run his face through face and recognition and we got a hit. Meet John Taylor, 35, single, no kids. He has a hug criminal record. Most of it, armed robberies." Nell answered to her boss.
In Sam's eyes the anger was drawn. He couldn't believe she was dead. He was sure that if one of them will never give up was Kensi. And now she had disappointed him. "Find him. And anyone who had worked in the past with him." Sam said determined to find her killer. "Will do!" the dynamic duo said.
Granger gave a look at Sam. "Agent Hanna….find them!"
"We will."
In the morgue
Kensi's body was lying on a cold table. Deeks couldn't stop looking her. "I'm sorry. I've promised myself that I will never let anyone hurt you. And yet I did. It's funny you know. You made me promise you that I will never get myself killed. And you were the one that break the promise."
That day came back to his mind, like it was yesterday.
"Promise me you'll do that!"
"What's that?"
"Get yourself killed."
"Well the good news for you is I have a natural aversion to death so…"
"I'm not kidding!"
"Okay."
"Okay."
His flashback was interrupted when the door opened. It was Rose.
"Deeks, I'm sorry. I thought no one was here…"
"No, no, no, I'm, I'm done. Hey listen I need a favor."
"Whatever."
"Please don't do anything. If her mother wants to see her, I prefer not to see her with the stitches."
"Of course. Whenever you are ready tell me."
"Thanks." And he turned his back to leave. Something inside him was telling him not to leave but he had to.
"Oh Deeks. When they brought her she was wearing this on her neck. I thought you may want to have it."
"Yeah. I gave it to her. Last summer on her birthday. She, um, she said she'll never take it off her neck, that it was something that keep her safe. But it looks like, it didn't. Thanks again."
In the marines corps cemetery
Granger felt like he had to be there; in his old friend's grave, asking for forgiveness. Donald Blye had called him a few hours before he died and he asked Granger to keep his daughter safe, to make sure that nothing will happen to her.
Granger didn't say anything. Just four words. "I'm sorry Don." And he left. He'd been there for a few minutes, just staring.
In the crime scene
Callen and Sam had just arrived. They passed under the yellow tape. Sam was angry and sad. Callen, just sad. He was barely keeping his tears in his eyes. He hesitated to enter. He stopped at the door and didn't know whether to go in or not. Finally, he did enter. There too much blood in the floor where Kensi was lying.
"G, we will find them!"
"We always do!"
"Yeah."
"Why her? Um? Why her?"
"She died fighting!"
She was so young. So young. She didn't deserve that!"
"No one does."
"No, Sam. The guys who did that, they do deserve it. They do deserve to die and they will." Now he was probably more angry that Sam.
"Will that bring her back G?" silence "Answer me! Will that bring her back?" still silence "No, it won't. Let's focus on the mission and find them."
Callen's phone was ringing. It was Eric. "Go Eric." he was on speaker. "We found some things. This was not a robbery at all!"
"Why?"
"The amount of money they took was not even the 1/3 of the money there were in the bank." And Nell entered the conversation. "We believe that it might have been a set up."
"For who?" Sam wondered.
"Kensi!" Eric answered. "We were able to find the car with which they fled the scene and it was this morning outside Kensi's place. And before you ask, the car is registered to John Taylor, our shooter. I've run his car through Kaleidoscope search but nothing so far."
"How did they knew Kensi was going to be here today?" That was a question Callen had that needed an answer. "Eric, see if you can find something."
"Okay." And they hang up.
In Kensi's mother's house
Deeks pulled over outside Kensi's mother's house. In all the way from the morgue he was trying to find a way to tell her that her daughter was dead, that she will never see her again. Finally, he got out, walked through the door and rang the bell. Took a while till Julia opened the door. She recognized him quickly.
"Hello Mrs. Feldman. Um…I'm not sure if you remember me. I'm Marty Deeks, I….work…with Kensi."
"Yes I remember you. Umm Kensi is not here so I'm not quite sure what you are doing here."
She saw tears in his eyes. He couldn't keep them. The wound was still fresh. But no matter how many years will pass, it will always hurt. Cause some wounds never hill.
"Umm I'm so sorry for that. I wish I could do something to….to change it, but…I… I can't." Hearing what he was saying to her, she knew he had some bad news. You don't always get your kid's partner in your door- unless it's a boyfriend/girlfriend and in that case it wasn't neither the one nor the other- and telling you those things.
"She's….she's gone."
"No, this cannot happen. No my girl is not dead. No!" It's really hard to tell a parent something like that. This was the second time Deeks was doing it. His first time was seven years ago, when he was still in the LAPD. A 17-year-old girl was found dead and he had to tell the family that their girl was never going to come back home.
"I'm sorry." And with tears in his eyes, he hugged her, trying to calm her down. But this was useless. No one and nothing was going to make her feel any better. She was deprived of her daughter for eighteen years. She found her again three years ago and now she lost her again. This time forever.
Julia offered him to come inside. "Do you know who did it?"
"We are still working on it. I promise you we'll find them. And they are going to pay. Okay. I promise you."
"Okay."
In Hetty's office
Hetty was making her tea, once again. She hadn't said a word, latterly a word, since she last saw Deeks this morning. Granger approached her. He had just returned from the cemetery. He entered her office and had a sit. He didn't speak either for a while.
"She's gone Henrietta."
"I'm aware of the situation Owen."
"And by sitting there what's going to change? Does the tea have anything magic that makes you forget things?"
"Ms Blye's death is not our only problem Owen."
"I know. You think it's them?"
"If they are, then they are sick!" Obviously, Hetty and Granger knew what they were talking about. What could this them be? Her killers or something else totally irrelevant?
"He doesn't want to go back. I'm not going to force him to return some place he doesn't like. These people there hate him. Don't you find it weird that they want him back?"
"Maybe. But that doesn't mean anything Hetty."
"You were with them when they said they'll do anything to bring Mr. Deeks back."
They want Deeks back. They were talking about LAPD. And Hetty was right, they hated Deeks. Why would they want him back? And what is being hidden behind this everything? Yes, Hetty has her suspicions. She thought behind this everything was the LAPD killing Kensi. Lieutenant Bates knew that Kensi was the one who was keeping Deeks in the NCIS. And Deeks knew that the LAPD wanted him back. But he didn't want go back, he had made that clear.
Granger didn't seem to share the same thoughts with Hetty. Or probably he didn't want to believe the Police Department would kill a federal agent just to get a detective back. "We cannot accuse the Los Angeles Police Department of the murder of a NCIS agent's death without evidence Henrietta, and we both know that. Granger was right. What Hetty was saying was insane. Just her beliefs were not enough.
Meanwhile, Deeks returned from Julia's house. "Mr. Deeks" and hearing Hetty calling him he approached her office "How are you doing?"
"Is that a trick question? How am I supposed to be? Um. I just lost partner."
"Where you've been?" Granger asked him with a tone like he was supposed to be working and not being absent.
"Someone needed to inform her mother."
"This was not your job."
"And who was going to do it?"
"I was going to do it Detective. I know her long time. You were not even bored."
"Well you didn't." And then nothing. Silence. Callen and Sam had just arrived and they were hearing them yelling to each other. That silence was broken by Eric. "Guys, we got something!" All five run to Ops wondering what this could be.
"What do you have Mr. Beale?"
"Kaleidoscope got a hit on Taylor's car."
"Where?"
"In Hollywood. We access a traffic camera and we had three men entering a house. One is Taylor, the other one is Peter Wilson and the third one is Marc White. Both have worked with Taylor in the past. That house is registered to Taylor. They are still there. Address is on your phones!"
Callen, Sam and Deeks left immediately so that they won't lose them. "Agent Callen" they stopped "Bring me at least one of them alive!"
"Yes sir!" It was the first time Callen said sir and he was serious.
In Taylor's house
All three armed, they approached the house as quite as possible. Callen and Sam were hidden under a window while Deeks was at the door. He knocked the door. No answer.
"No answer!"
"Try again!" Callen ordered.
Deeks knocked again. Still no answer. "Nothing."
Before they were able to think something shootings started falling. Callen and Sam took cover under the window so did Deeks. "Federal Agents, drop your weapons!" Sam yelled. And at the same time a grenade was thrown. Sam yelled again "Grenade!" he took it and threw it back, inside the house. And then a big explosion.
Ten minutes later
The ambulance had just left with Taylor. He was badly injured. The paramentics said he might not make it. Thankfully, Callen, Sam and Deeks were fine but Wilson and White didn't make it. Deeks didn't even care if Taylor would survive; he killed his partner, the only person in the world that really mattered for him, that gave him a reason to live every day. But Taylor had to survive. He was the only one who could tell them who organized the attack in the bank.
"Hey, are you okay?" Callen asked Deeks.
"If he dies, I'll be."
"We need him alive, Deeks. He is the only one who can give us a name!"
"Yeah." He said and went to his car.
In the Pacific Beach Medical Hospital
The three boys entered the hospital searching for Hetty and Granger. "What happen out there?" Hetty asked looking at Callen. "What part of I need at least one of them alive don't you understand? Wilson and White are dead, Taylor may not make it…" and Granger was interrupted.
"What did you want us to do, uh? They started shooting us, we needed to fight back!" Callen answer him with an angry tone in his voice.
"And throwing a grenade inside the house was a solution?" looking at Sam now.
"I thought this was the right thing Granger." Sam justified himself
"Assistant Director Granger for you and all of you."
Deeks didn't say a word. He was just listening to Callen fighting with Granger, once again. "I want all three stay here till two NCIS agents arrive to keep an eye on Taylor. And then back in Ops."
"Why NCIS and not LAPD?" Deeks finally spoke. And his question was right and a question both Callen and Sam had. "He is our suspect, and he'll be under our custody." Granger walked away. Callen looked Hetty in the eyes. "Something we should know?" Hetty stared at Callen for a while. "No Mr. Callen. Just do what he said." And she left too.
"Granger is lying."
"Won't be the first time." Sam answered to his partner. Probably Granger started thinking what Hetty had said, that the LAPD was probably involved in Kensi's murder case. Even though at the beginning he was totally against that thought and that possibility, he wanted to make sure that Taylor wouldn't be in contact with anyone from the LAPD, in case Hetty was right, again.
In Ops
Meanwhile, Eric and Nell were trying to find out how Taylor and his associates knew that Kensi was going to be in the bank. "Okay, that's it. I give up. I can't find anything." He gave a look at Nell who had almost broke into tears. "Nell, are you okay?"
"I still can't believe she's gone."
"Me neither."
"She was like a big sister to me. And now if Hetty wants me to partner up with Deeks,…., I don't know if I can do it. Taking her place like that…" Eric was trying to comfort her "Don't see it like that. I'm sure she knows that you don't want to do it like that."
"She is still not coming back Eric."
A few seconds later the doors opened. It was Nate. The doctor was back as soon as Hetty called to let him know what happened. "Nate what are you doing here?" that was Eric's first question when he saw him walking in. "I took the first flight and came as soon as Hetty called me. Have you found them, yet?"
"Kind of. You found the shooter but not the mastermind." Nell answered him.
"Right. Where are Callen, Sam and Deeks?"
"On their back from the hospital." Nate was looking at Eric with a confused look. "Sit down, we'll brief you."
In Sam's challenger
Sam was driving, as usual, and Callen was staring outside the window.
"We catch these guys, then what?"
"Send them behind bars."
"I'm talking about Deeks. He is angry. He wants to kill them."
"Revenge is not what we do."
"I hope you are right Sam."
"Yeah me too."
Callen's phone started ringing. It was a text from Ops. "It's Eric. Nate is back. Hetty called him." Sam noticed Callen was thinking something else, not who the mastermind might be. "You want to share G?"
"It doesn't make sense. Why Granger doesn't want LAPD keep an eye on Taylor? I mean he is not the first suspect we have in a hospital. Think about it. Whoever is in the hospital, from NCIS agents and civilian victims to terrorists and bad guys, always the LAPD had them under custody. Why not now?" Obviously Callen was suspecting something.
"You got a point G. we won't lose anything to ask the Assistant Director."
"Yeah, like he is going to tell us."
"Maybe Hetty."
"Do you really believe that?"
"No. but she may talk to you."
"I'll give it a shot." Callen was willing to try but he knew Hetty wasn't going to tell him anything.
In the office
Granger was in Hetty's office. "It looks like Owen you started believing in my thoughts."
"Probably."
"They need to know."
"Know what Henrietta? We don't even know anything for sure. What are you going to tell them?" Granger was right. If they talked to Callen, Sam and Deeks, the thing they will tell them would be few and almost useless. Hetty saw Callen coming her way and felt like something was going on.
"How's Taylor?" this was the first thing Granger asked Callen when he saw him.
"Doctor said he's lucky to be alive and that he is going to be fine. But when Deeks pays him a visit he'll wish he had died."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Deeks is more than pissed right now."
"Then make sure he is not going to be in contact with him. Understood?"
"Yes." He waited for a while. "Do you have something else you want to talk about?"
"Like what Agent Callen?"
"I don't know. Maybe tell me why we have Taylor under NCIS custody and not LAPD."
"Don't you think you have given to that matter very extent?"
"Answer me!"
"I don't like your tone Agent Callen. I suggest you get back to work." Callen turned his back and walked away.
Sam was looking for Deeks and he found him at the gym, punching a bag. Deeks' memories started coming back; the day he met Kensi.
"This is Corporal Craig Mangold, retired, this is Corporal Dale Johnson, Corporal Nelson Shabazz, and that's Jason Wyler. This is Tracy, Danny's girl."
"Yeah. How did you find out?"
"Police called me. My number is in his cell phone."
The first time they laid eyes on each other, the day will never forget for two reasons: 1) it was the first time he saw Kensi and 2) it was that day. The day that somebody killed her, the day he lost her forever. April 6th. A day that became his worst one. And that is why he wanted to grab a coffee with her in the morning. Tell her how much he loves her, that he wants to spend that rest of his life with her. And maybe go out for dinner.
Sam walked in to check on Deeks. "Hey, how are you doing?"
"Why everyone is asking me that today?"
"Because we know it's hard for you."
"And by asking me all the time you think something will change?"
"No."
"Do you know what today day is? April 6th. The first day I saw her in that MMA gym, looking me with those eyes. The last five years were the best of my life Sam. The best."
"She was actually laughing. I haven't seen her like that for years. You knew how to make her happy."
"Yeah. You know two years ago she…, she made me promise her that I'll never get myself killed. But now she is gone. And she is not coming back."
Callen walked in in a rush. "Taylor regained consciousness. Doctor said we can see him."
Pacific Beach Medical, room 201
The three men were approaching Taylor's room. Outside, there were two NCIS agent watching around in case somebody would help him escape. They stopped. "Deeks are you sure, you want to go in?" Sam asked as gently as he could. "Yeah." They showed their IDs and entered the room. Taylor was awake.
"Who are you?"
"NCIS. We want to talk to you." Callen replied.
"You put me in here?"
"Trust me. You wish you had died in your house with your buddies." Deeks told him with an angry tone.
"This morning, you robbed a bank down-town and killed a federal agent." Sam continued.
"I don't know what you are talking about."
"Okay here is a thing. There are two ways to tell us the truth. The first one is the easy one; you give us the name of the guy that had you kill her and it's all over, for now. The second one is, I leave you here alone with him" Callen pointed at Deeks "and he is going to hurt till you give us a name. That would be the hard way. And trust me you are going to like it." Taylor was looking with fear in his eyes.
"You have ten seconds." Sam started counting "10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1. Time is up. He is yours Deeks. Let us know when you are finished."
And Callen and Sam made their way to the door while Deeks was approaching him with his gun in his hand.
"You are not going to do it, right?" Taylor was ever scared now.
"You killed everything that mattered in my life. You took her away from me on the worst way. And that's how you are going to pay for that."
"Okay, okay. I'll give you his name, I'll give you his name."
"Who is he?" Sam asked.
"Frank Scarli."
Deeks' eyes were full of angry at first but now full of surprise. "You know him?" Callen asked him seeing like that. "Yeah I do!" he answered with fear. "Who is he?"
Outside an abandoned warehouse
Deeks was waiting in his red sedan to meet with a guy from the LAPD. A while later, another car parked next to Deeks' sedan. A man in grey suit got out, opened the shotgun's door in Deeks' car and got in.
The man talked. "You said you wanted to talk to me?"
"Yeah I do Frank." Yes, he was the same Frank that Taylor had told them about the man who ordered Kensi's murder, the same man who had told Hetty that he's going to do everything to bring Deeks back to the LAPD.
"What's going on?" Frank asked Deeks.
"Why do you want me back?"
"There is an operation in which you are needed."
"Me?!"
"Why confused?"
"I'm sure you have heard that my partner is dead. And we found her killer. He gave us a name of the man who gave the order. That man would be you. You ordered her murder. You killed her Frank."
"She was keeping you on the NCIS and we wanted you back. I'm sorry Deeks" and pulled out his gun and pointed at Deeks. "No you are not."
And then Sam showed up and pointed Frank with his gun. "Lower your weapon!" and Deeks took it immediately from Frank and got out of the car. "You get all that?" he asked Callen. "Every word of it!" Sam passed him the handicaps and Frank asked Deeks. "So tell me Deeks, how was she in bed, huh?"
"What did you say? Ask me again!" he was very angry and pulled out his gun. "Ask me again!" Callen tried to stop him. "Deeks. He's not worth it." And Deeks louder now "Ask it again!"
And then Granger showed up. "Detective put down your weapon."
"He killed her!"
"And he is going to pay. But not like that. Killing him won't bring Kensi back." Granger was right. Sam took the gun from Deeks' hand. Deeks turned to Frank and punched him as hard as he could.
Callen and Sam pulled Deeks back and Frank yelled. "You saw that! You all saw that!"
"I didn't see a thing. Did you see anything Sam?"
"Not a thing."
"Sir?"
"Nothing." And Deeks walked away.
Later in the office
Eric and Nell were rolling the stairs to inform Callen and Sam on something they had found.
"What's going on?" Callen asked seeing them in such a rush.
"We believe we found the reason LAPD wanted Deeks back." Nell answered and Eric continued "Two months ago a detective went undercover working on a case involving drug dealing. That detective was killed by the cartel within three weeks. And the LAPD wanted to send Deeks undercover on that mission. Guys they wanted to kill him!" Callen and Sam couldn't believe what they were just told. They couldn't believe that the Los Angeles Police Department would want to kill one of their own.
"How sure we can be?" Sam asked.
"Totally. Officer Scarli admitted when Assistant Director Granger and Hetty interrogated him in the boatshed." Nell said.
"Where is Nate?" Callen asked.
"Uh, he went to find Deeks and talk." Eric answered.
"Okay. Go home, get some rest. Tomorrow it's going to be a hard day for all of us."
"Good night." Both Eric and Nell said and left.
"You, too. Go home, spend some time with your family." he waited for a moment. "Are you okay?"
"No G." he took a big breath, "She's gone."
"It hurts me too." he stopped for a while, "She,…, she left fighting Sam, fighting." And he started crying.
"Yeah." Sam said, picked his things and left.
A few minutes later Callen was at the gym, punching a bag. He was crying and memories were coming back in his mind. She was like a sister to him. The sister he never met. The sister he lost when he was young. The day he met her came back to his mind.
February 2006
Callen walked in a bar and waited for Sam. He saw a blond-hair and good-looking girl leaving and he approached her.
"I think it's kind of early to leave, don't you think?" he asked her.
"I got a new job. I'm starting tomorrow so…"
"You have to go home early."
"Exactly. And you go to bars alone?"
"No. I'm waiting for a friend."
"Okay then. Good night…"
"Callen" the girl was looking at him "Just Callen. Good night…"
"Kensi" Yes! That girl was Kensi.
"Why do I have a feeling that we will see each other again?" Callen said.
"If you are usually coming here, probably we will."
"No. I avoid going to the same place more than one time." Kenai was looking at him with a weird look. "It's the job."
"Oh, okay then. Good night."
"Good night."
The next day, Kensi walked in the Office of Special Projects and approached the boys' desks.
"Can I help you?" Sam asked her as he saw her looking around.
"Yes. I'm looking for Ms Lange. I'm Kensi Blye. I applied to the NCIS about a month ago and I was accepted. They called and told me to come here today and speak with Ms Lange."
"You are lucky. These things usually take time. Welcome aboard. Sam Hanna."
"What's going on?" Callen asked as he was coming to his desk.
"G, meet Kensi Blye. She is a new agent." Sam briefed his partner.
"So, that's the job." She said to Callen. Sam was looking at them, for a while and then said. "You two know each other?"
"Last night at the bar when I was waiting for you. She was leaving. Welcome aboard."
"Thank you both."
"So why did you decide to join NCIS?" Sam asked her.
"My father was a marine."
"Was? He retired?"
"No. He died."
"When?"
"December 12th 1997"
"Oh, I'm sorry."
"No. It's okay. I've got used to it."
"I'm a marine too."
"Navy seal." Callen finished.
His memory stopped there, like he didn't want to remember anything else. Just that moment.
At the beach
Deeks was sitting in the sand looking the waves going up and down. He couldn't stop thinking her. 'Was she in pain? Did she suffer?' He was angry with everyone in the department. Earlier he had talked with Bates and he had assured Deeks that he had nothing to do with Kensi's murder. Deeks trusted Bates; he had never lied to him before.
Nate came behind him. "I came. What do you want?" Deeks asked him.
"How are doing?"
Deeks stood up. "Do you know how many times I've been asked that question today?"
"I know it's hard for you."
"You don't know anything. No one can understand how I am feeling right. No one can understand what I am going through, Nate. No one."
"Okay, maybe you are right. She was your partner."
"She was everything to me Nate. EVERYTHING! And that son of the bitch took her from me."
"I heard today it's your anniversary. Five years as partners." Deeks nobbed his head. He didn't say anything for a while. Neither did Nate.
"If they wanted to kill me why they didn't? Why did they have to kill her? Why?"
"I wish I could give you an answer on that."
"I loved her Nate, more than anything else in this world. I've never said that to anyone."
"Why?"
"I don't know. Maybe because I was afraid of how she would react. When I told her she was beautiful she punched me in the arm. Imagine what she'd do if I had told her I loved her."
"How's her mother doing?"
"She lost her daughter, again. Now forever. And she blames herself for that."
"Why don't you go home, get some rest. You need to be strong for tomorrow."
"Yeah." And he left.
In Sam's house
Sam entered his house. His girls were sleeping. It's been about an hour since he left the office but he needed to walk alone. He went to his daughter's bedroom and kissed her forehead. And then he went to his and Michelle's room and sat in the edge of the bed. Michelle wake up and asked him "How was your day baby?"
"Couldn't be worst."
"What happened?"
"Kensi, she is gone. She is dead."
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." A memory came back to Michelle; the day Kensi saved her life from the two Bond girls aka Siderov's girls.
The next day before the funeral
Deeks was in Kensi's place. Dressed in a blank suit he was looking to some pictures she had on her desk. In some of them she was with her father and in some other, more, she was with Deeks. That was the time he realized how happy he was making her and that Sam was right when he said that. He sat on the floor and cried. A few minutes later Hetty entered Kensi's place. Deeks heard her and pulled his head up. "Hetty, what are you doing here?"
"I could ask you the same thing."
"Um, I came to pick some stuffs her,…, her mother wants and I will go to pick her up for the funeral. What are doing here?"
"I came to say goodbye. It's a long goodbye, Mr. Deeks, a long one. I had her like my daughter. I was proud of her. She was a strong girl with many ambitions and she had many years to live. But it looks like life was very mien to her."
"I was proud of saying that I have a female partner and that she is the bravest. I can't believe that she didn't give up in Afghanistan a year ago and she gave up in this."
Hetty saw Deeks holding her knife again, just like when she told him that Kensi was reassigned for a classified mission.
"That looks familiar."
"It was her dad's."
"Well, that is quit a gift."
"Yeah, well sometimes a knife is just a knife."
"And now she is entrusted to you."
Kensi was wrong. That knife was not just a knife. Her father had given it to her when she was young and she gave it to Deeks after that.
Deeks went to pick Julia up for the funeral. He knocked the door and Julia answered it immediately.
"Are you ready?" He asked her.
"Yes." She said with tears in her eyes. They were red; probably she was crying all the night.
In the cemetery
The coffin was in front and behind Deeks holding Julia by the hand trying to give her some strength to move on. No one could keep their tears; probably only Hetty and Granger. Sam was accompanied by Michelle, Nate by Rose and Callen by Joelle. He had gone to her house last night and he had told her everything; where he works, his family story, the vendetta with the Comescu family, everything. He was in a real terrible mode and he wanted to speak to someone. And he though Joelle was the best one. He loved her and was seeing their story seriously.
The same night
Deeks dropped Julia in her house and decided to stay with her rather than go with the others for a drink to Kensi's memory. Julia was sitting in the couch while Deeks approached her coming from the kitchen.
"Here you are." He said giving her a glass of water.
"Thank you." None of them said anything for a while. Deeks took out of his pocket the necklace Kensi was wearing when she was killed; the one Rose gave to him in the morgue yesterday morning.
"Here, take it." He said giving her the necklace.
"No. She would want you to have it. You can keep it. I have many things in here to make me think my daughter every single day. You have to keep it."
"Thank you. Thank you very much. You know she said that…"
"She will never take it off." Julia interrupted him "She said that to me too when she showed it to me. I've never seen her that happy. That day I understood how much important you were in her life."
"She was very important to me too. She was the reason I woke up every day and gave a reason to live, just to see her eyes, her smile; just to see her."
At a bar
Callen, Sam, Nate, Eric and Nell were having their drink while Deeks entered the bar and approached them.
"How is her mother doing?" Sam asked Deeks.
"She is trying to deal with it. It's going to be hard."
"For all of us." Callen continued.
Eric raised his glass and said "To Kensi!"
"To Kensi!" they said together.