Dean was sitting on the hood of the Impala under the stars in the middle of nowhere—which was somewhere near Bobby's place. One hand was shoved in the warm pocket of his leather jacket and the other holding a bottle of whiskey, slowly being chilled by the cold air. He watched the distance where the outlines of tall trees showed in the moonlight and occasionally took a swig from the bottle. A jumble of thoughts raced through his befuddled mind but they often turned to Cas, either missing him or being angry with him.
"Dean?" Sam's voice was carried by the slight breeze to Dean's ear. He glanced around and found Sam pulling up in one of Bobby's junk cars. His brother got out of the car and came closer, shivering slightly from the chill.
"You know, I really just want to be alone for right now, Sam," Dean said quietly, eyes refusing to meet his brother's.
"Sure, Dean. I just wanted to check up on you," Sam replied hesitantly. He looked at his brother with questions, but he knew not to voice them.
The two brothers glanced away from each other as Dean spoke. "I'll be back in a couple hours. I just want to think things over for a while."
Sam nodded. "Alright, I won't wait up for you then." He turned back towards his car and slowly drove away. Dean sighed, partly in relief, and partly in sadness.
A short time later Dean heard footsteps crunching on the dirt and coming towards him. "Sam, I told you I'd be back in a while," he said over his shoulder, not bothering to look at him.
"It's not Sam," replied Castiel's voice softly, stopping just yards away.
Dean made a groaning sound in annoyance. "You're the last person I want to talk to right now, Cas," he said acidly.
"I know." Cas moved so that he was in Dean's field of vision. "I just want you to hear me out is all."
Dean looked him over with a set jaw, but relented with a muttered, "Fine."
Cas took in a breath and began. "I know that all of this is confusing and hard to take in. And it's probably not something you wanted on your shoulders."
"Nope, definitely not," Dean interjected. Cas gave him a look and Dean pursed his lips.
"But us," the angel continued, "This doesn't change anything between us. Or rather, I don't want it to change anything and I don't think you do either." He paused, staring at Dean with helpless eyes. "I'm sorry that I've kept all of this from you especially, but I felt it was necessary until now. And I'm sorry that everything seems to be happening at once, it's not how I ever planned or wanted things to turn out. But I don't want to lose you over all of this. I can't lose you." While he'd been speaking Cas had been slowly moving closer to Dean until he was standing just before him.
Dean waved the bottle slightly and said, "Don't… don't touch me." He soaked everything Cas had said in and mulled it over with a sip of whiskey. "And you're not lying, right?" he asked cautiously, but he only had to see the naked emotions floating in the angel's eyes to have his answer. "Well, you're right that I don't want things to change either. But, with everything happening, it's just going to be hard to keep this up with our normal façades, too."
"But we can try?" Cas suggested.
Dean's lips quirked up. "But we can try," he echoed surely.
"Can I touch you now?" the angel asked eagerly.
Still smiling slightly, Dean nodded. Cas first took the bottle from Dean's hand and set it on the ground. Then, leaning down, he put one arm around Dean and the other hand he placed at the back of his head. Gluing their mouths together, Cas gently lay Dean down on the hood of the car and followed on top. Dean's arms wound their way inside Castiel's trench coat and around his waist.
"Dean," Cas started, pulling back and looking into the man's eyes.
But Dean pulled the angel's body to his own and said, "Shut up," against his lips. "I can't stay mad at you," he whispered. He felt Cas smile slightly and kissed him again.
Meanwhile Bobby arrived quietly in his car, but when he saw the two men together, he smiled smugly and returned home, telling Sam only that Dean might be a little late.