Two Negatives Make Something Like Love
Before I say anything else, I have a message for a friend: HAPPY BIRTHDAY LittleLoneLiar!! HERE'S THE FICCY I PROMISED I'D HAVE FOR YOU TODAY! I HOPE YOU LIKE IT!! … It looks sort of like my caps-lock got stuck there for a minuet, doesn't it?
Okay, now that I've finished making a total fool of myself, let me explain what I can. I wrote this one shot especially for LittleLoneLiar, as you may have deduced from my previous notes. It is a poor attempt at Zemyx fluff, meaning Zexion is probably going to get even more pissed at me than he doubtlessly already is after all the crap I'm currently putting him through in PoS. -sweat drops- oh, yeah, you know what I mean. I guess I can't help but make him over think everything… Must revise that… Well, let's get this show on the road, shall we?
Disclaimer: Not yet…
X.x.X.x.X
The Cloaked Schemer stood alone on a high cliff, at the far western edge of the World That Never Was. It had been raining moments before, and the Schemer had neglected to cover his head, so his bangs flopped against the side of his smooth, pale face, water dripping down his neck causing him to shiver slightly.
This happened every time he visited this place. It would always rain, and he would always stand alone, freezing from the ever-night cold, the empty cavity that once held a heart aching dully in his chest. It always happened as such, and he never complained. After all, it did seem as though it had been preordained of him, as if this was the price he had to pay for his Somebody's wrongdoings. Gods knew there had been a list of them.
He stared out at the swirling nothingness that had once been distant worlds, pondering. The average passerby – if there had been anyone in the World That Never Was to pass by – might have mistaken the man for a statue, standing in a never-ending reprieve, endlessly scouring for gods-knew what. But he was always looking for something.
He didn't jump when a dark portal opened not nine feet behind him, (although he had been mildly startled) nor did he flinch when an impossible mix of saltwater and vanilla reached his sensitive nostrils.
No. He simply stared on, as if he might miss something consequential if he were to avert his gaze. "What is it, Nine?" He deadpanned.
The spoken to Nobody came forward to stand beside his superior, smiling nervously. He stared at the shorter man for several seconds before the Schemer lost his patience.
"I swear, Nine, now is not a time for you to stare needlessly, if you don't have anything to say, remove yourself from my presence at once."
"Oh!" The younger exclaimed, jumping a little. "Sorry, Zexion. I do actually have a reason for coming here! I just… Uh…"
"Out with it." Six ordered, finally turning to face the other, a ghost of the emotion anger flashing dangerously in his single visible steel-blue eye.
The blond winced at the tone, not being one to do well with scolding. "It's just that I- I'm not sure how to put it…"
"More of you philosophical anomalies?" The older inquired, vague interest gracing his attractive face.
The younger man laughed outright then, disturbing the festering peace of the lonesome place. "I guess you could call it that, Six, but it is a bit more important to me then some conjecture on life."
"Oh, really?" Zexion would admit, only if he were caught in the act, that he quite enjoyed speaking with the young blond musician, as he had a unique view on life that was often so very contrary to the things the blunette's precious science had taught him. Contrary to popular belief, the blond was actually quite intelligent. "What could possibly be more important than that?"
"You." Nine replied simply.
Zexion looked away instantly, focusing instead on the swirling depths of the lost worlds in front of the helter-skelter pair. "Care to elaborate?"
Demyx smiled shyly. "If it's okay," He gathered his nerve for a moment, then, "There's this one day a year, today, actually, when I've noticed that you disappear. I guess you spend the whole day here, don't you? Looking out over the graveyard of the dead worlds? I realized that I really don't know all that much about you… But you know nearly everything there is to know about me." He chuckled slightly. "It isn't exactly what I'd call a fair trade."
The elder pondered this for a moment. "You want to know about my past?"
The blond nodded nervously. "What's so special about today?"
Zexion sighed, staring out into the purple and black wreckage. "Yes… Yes, I suppose it is fair enough for me to share it with you. But I warn you now," He glanced over at the youth briefly, "It is no bedtime story."
"Please?"
"I have been like this – Zexion – for nearly twenty years now, did you know that?" He didn't wait for an answer. "I stand here because… On this day, all those years ago, I was still real. It was the last day where I was still myself. Ienzo."
"No wonder you're so withdrawn," Demyx murmured sadly.
"Ienzo had a lot to loose. I was chosen by the new 'Ansem' as the sixth and final apprentice in person. I was young, talented, impressive, and… well, arrogant."
"How young?"
"Fifteen."
The blond gasped. His original had lived into his mid twenties before the darkness took him. It still felt like much too early. But Zexion – He had still, by all means and measures, been a child!
The older shook his head solemnly. "I was brighter than anyone else in my generation. Which only makes the things I did all the worse." The wind blew across their backs, sending their black cloaks to dance eerily. "I would prefer to say I had not known about what the Heartless could do at the time, but that would be quite a stretch. Too much of one, honestly."
"But if you knew what could happen, why did you do it?" Innocence. It was something Zexion would love in his companion if he were capable of the emotion.
"I was a scientist, Demyx. We all were. Everything I did, all the things I sacrificed," His tone held an air of heavy bitterness, coupling perhaps with what could have been regret. "Were entirely for the sake of discovery."
"Oh," Silence filled the air for a while, both Nobodies staring into the abyss, dark thoughts consuming their minds. Finally Demyx broke the stillness. "Was it worth it? The discovery?"
Honesty. Something Six never fathomed the use of, except for in Demyx's presence. "Perhaps not," He admitted. "Defiantly not." He revised angrily. "I have found over the years that some things are not meant to be understood within the laws of science. A human's heart is an excellent example."
"What is it you look for here? Is it the answers to something in your past?"
"Ienzo had a family. A mother, brothers, and… and a sister. She wasn't yet a year old when the Heartless were released into the town."
"You're looking for her."
Zexion shook his head "I suppose the correct term would be that I am searching for a way to repent. Ienzo failed them… I failed them… Just like I failed you." Serious eyes fell upon the Nocturne, soggy hair pushed from Zexion's face to expose both eyes.
Demyx stared. Then he smiled. "I don't mind." The Schemer raised one thin eyebrow skeptically. The blond could feel the self-hatred pulsing off of his superior in waves. "I'd rather be here, in this screwed up world, with these crazy people that shoot lighting from their fingertips, and read minds, and spurt flower petals at random then be back where I was."
"Why?" Fascinating. Demyx's ideals were always the most fascinating words to be heard for those select few who bothered to listen.
"You don't know everything about me you know." Demyx grinned brightly, snatching his elder's hand up in his own, holding it tightly. "Myde wasn't as lucky as me. He might have lived in the heart of Fisherman's Horizon, right on the water where he could go to relax whenever he wanted, but,"
The Schemer waited with baited breath, how could anything be worth loosing one's heart?
"But Myde was all alone, and I have you." The blond finished simply, absolutely glowing, even as a fresh spout of rain began to fall to the ground, drenching both of them more so than they had been already. "Maybe it doesn't seem like much, but what good is having a heart if you don't have anyone to give it to? Frankly, I'd rather do without."
The Schemer stared for a long, rather tense moment. This thought process… It was absurd, it was ridiculous… It was… Amazing. Purely amazing.
There was a sudden throbbing tightness to Zexion's throat then. All the pain and suffering, all the humiliation and loss, everything that had happened to the Nobodies, and the Worlds, so much of it being his fault, and here was this – this angel of a being, speaking of it as if it was all a little hiccup in the scheme of things.
Hell, in the scheme of everything, it probably was.
Zexion was unsure of when it happened, but when he snatched up the chains on the taller Nobody's cloak and yanked him down to meet his own cool lips, the Schemer knew exactly why. Never, in all his life – either of them – had he ever felt like he was relevant. Never, did he feel needed, wanted, cherished…. Loved. He had always felt like a pawn, as insignificant as anyone he'd used for his own gain. But now, in this place, he knew he couldn't give up and fade away.
For Demyx.
Yes, that was it; he existed for that one little Nobody, pointless, needless, perfect. Demyx needed someone to make sure he wasn't alone anymore.
One strong hand settled at Zexion's waist, its partner caressing the pale face soothingly, gloves missing. Zexion, without breaking away from the Nocturne, shed his own gloves, discarding them to the soggy ground. Then, with the precision of the scientist he had once been, he reached into the springy blond locks, combing through them, massaging Nine's scalp, running pale fingernails gently down the back of the younger male's neck, never resting in one place for too long.
Demyx needed caring for. Zexion needed this feeling. This – completeness he had never had before. The Cloaked Schemer, however did not deserve this peace.
Warm hands explored Zexion's chest lightly, his cloak left undone, hanging awkwardly on his porcelain-like shoulders. He let out a soft sound into the mouth of the other as he fought to remove the water-sodden cloak from the lithe and tan figure. He got his wish moments later and proceeded to fondle the warm, rain slickened skin.
No, Zexion had committed far too many crimes to deserve this…
He found himself on his hands and knees, straddling the blond youth, sucking on his smooth neck while toying with the belt around the younger's waist.
"Mmmmmm, Zex," Murmured the other, twisting underneath Zexion's body. "Not here…"
He was right. The Schemer leapt from the spot, opening a dark portal hastily as the Nocturne climbed to his feet unsteadily.
"It's just like math," Demyx thought aloud vaguely, regaining his composure.
"What is?" Zexion turned to face his lover, the portal behind them spinning hauntingly.
"Us." The blond smiled at Zexion's confused expression. "Well, we don't have hearts, right?"
"Correct,"
"So we're like negatives,"
Where could the blond man be going with this? "I suppose."
"But together," Demyx laced their fingers together before continuing, "It's like we exist."
"How does that pertain to math?"
The blond chuckled and kissed his partner's pale lips. "Two negatives multiply together to make a positive!"
It was true that Zexion did not deserve this kind of love. But as he laid underneath the covers some time later curled up against the warm body of Number Nine, feeling more than listening to the sound of his calm breaths of slumber, He smiled, knowing that what he did or did not deserve was marvelously irrelevant. What mattered was the blond beside him, and the future they would have, hearts or not.
"Happy birthday, Ienzo." He whispered, leaving a soft kiss on his slumbering other's forehead before joining him contently in the realm of dreams.
X.x.X.x.X
YAY! It's finished! I do hope you liked it, dear LittleLoneLiar! Happy birthday again! lols
… It turned out so much darker… and so much more citrus-y than I originally intended… That's the closest to a lemon I've ever been too… O.o Weird… In any case, I hope this was satisfactory! XD ... Actually, It's nothing like my original plan... oh, well.
(I'm on time! Kindof… It's still today… just into the evening hours… 8D Why did the end of this fight me so much? Eh, maybe it has something to do with my experience in making out… Or lack thereof. But none the less, it is currently 9:15 exactly and I'm finishing this up. Now I'll just upload it and there we go!)
Later Days! XD