"Damn. I know I just had it. I could have sworn I put it in my pocket," she muttered under her breath to the empty room.
Seventeen year old Lily Evans flung clothes and books around the room in a haphazard fashion, silently praying for her wand to appear. Slightly out of breath, Lily stood still, staring at the mess she had made, and felt helpless. The year was starting out as a disaster already. With only hours before she had to be on the train, and still not even half packed, Lily's day was getting worse by the minute. Sighing, she began sorting through her array of belongings, still wishing her wand would find its way back into her hands. Picking up each object on her floor one by one, the fiery red head examined them, trying to decide what she wanted to take with her to school. Having already packed her robes and necessary school books, she knew everything packed now would be extra. Her green sweater and favorite bell bottoms were folded neatly in the disarray of clothing at her feet, and she threw those in for good measure. Walking over to her stately armoire, she opened the top drawer and emptied its contents into her trunk.
As she sorted through mismatched socks and frilly knickers, Lily's shiny prefects badge fell to the ground. Nostalgia rolled over her, engulfing her like a tidal wave as she bent down to retrieve it. She thought back to her earlier years at Hogwarts, especially the ones before talk of war broke out. Everything then was so much simpler, although at the time it certainly didn't seem it.
A few weeks after school let out, Dumbledore sent word by owl the Lily had been awarded the title of Head Girl. While certainly an immense offer, Lily couldn't help but wonder if she could fulfill all of her new duties while simultaneously maintaining her grades. Her free time would take a serious hit, but Lily knew the few close friends she had wouldn't hold it against her.
Although she wasn't nearly ready for her Seventh and most difficult year at school, Lily was grateful for her summer holidays to be over. Since her falling out with Severus, her home seemed emptier to her than ever before. She had no friends in the area, and very little contact with anyone from school. Petunia was never any help, taunting her to no end, and trying to get her into as much trouble as she could manage. Just last week when Lily had caught her sneaking out to meet that dreadful Vernon boy, Petunia had turned it around on her. Telling their parents that she caught Lily sneaking out, she was grounded for the remainder of her holidays, unable to leave her room. Besides the fact that Lily had no one to sneak out and meet, their parents took Petunia's side, a fact which Lily was almost glad for. She watched Petunia's anguish as she herself was fawned over for being a witch, and knew her sister was jealous of the attention and praise she received from them. Although she wasn't glad to be confined like an inmate, Lily really had no reason to go anywhere else either. Despite the fact that Petunia made it clear in more ways than one that she wanted nothing to do with Lily now that she was a witch, she still held a soft spot in her heart for her sister.
The sound of her bedroom door being thrown open pulled Lily back from her thoughts. On the other side of the door frame stood a frail girl, in her early twenties, with stringy brown-blonde hair and a sour look upon her face. The scowl that was almost a permanent fixture on her otherwise well proportioned features was displayed prominently, and the shadow she cast into the room seemed to envelope Lily into a state of fleeting darkness.
"Why dear sister, how unlike you it is to leave your packing to the last minute. And your room…such a disgrace. Whatever have you been doing in here all summer long? It's like you're a hermit or something." Petunia wrinkled her nose into a look of disgust. The malice and hatred in her steely eyes was easily recognizable, especially if you knew exactly what it was to look for. "And my god, what is that smell? Is that you?"
Lily rolled her eyes and turned back to her task, trying her best to ignore her sister. She would not let Petunia upset her today, as she had so many times in the past. Lily's first day of school was always one of the biggest battles the two sisters had each year. It was like clockwork, and Lily preferred to avoid it at all costs. She continued her search without a word, silently willing her sister to turn back around and leave the house, or at the very least her doorway. After several moments passed in a cold and unnerving silence, Petunia backed away from the door frame. With a knowing smile, in her last ditch effort to rile her sister, Petunia sneered and her blue eyes flashed a look of utter hatred.
"Hey Lily, missing something? When I took the liberty of bringing your clean clothes upstairs, I found something laying about that you might just need." Lily turned on her heels and starred at Petunia, her large green eyes huge and round with shock.
"Since they seem to teach you nothing useful at that school of yours, and you've always been a driveling idiot, I'll spell it out for you. I-Have-Your-Wand!" Petunia dragged the words out in a slow manner, as if she were speaking to someone who didn't understand the language she spoke. With that she slammed the door shut, and the sound of her feet pounding down the hallway and then the stairs was the only thing Lily could hear echoing in her brain.
After coming to her senses, Lily tore off after her sister, knowing that she would have to catch up with her in order to get her wand back. She heard the back door slam shut, and immediately her eyesight tunneled and her vision turned red with fury. Bounding down the outside steps after her, Lily sprinted lightly, all the while searching for her sister. She headed towards the most likely place Petunia would be, and sure enough heard giggling coming from the bushes outside the grand cobblestone house. The crinkled leaves beneath Lily's feet must have alerted Petunia to her presence, and her sister emerged with her steady boyfriend Vernon. Vernon, whose portly appearance made Petunia seem small and frail beside him, took her hand as he prepared himself for the sisters' oncoming battle. Lily always felt that his superior manner and ignorant indifference encouraged Petunia's abuse of everyone around her who didn't fit into their perfect image of normalcy.
"See Vernon, what did I tell you? The little witchy would come running after her toy." Petunia shrieked with laughter as she waved Lily's wand around in her hand. "She's so dense; I bet she really does think she's a witch. It's a wonder that reform school lets her out for even a day or two, let alone an entire summer break all on her own."
Vernon chuckled, and his face turned red from laughter. Lily's rage continued to grow, her resentment for Petunia threatened to erupt.
It was Lily's turn to laugh. "Reform school? Is that what you tell all your silly little mates?" She continued to giggle, refusing to let her sister get the better of her. "Why don't you let me see my 'toy,' and I'll show you what they teach me in reform school. Unless you're too afraid Petunia."
Petunia clearly hadn't anticipated being shown up by her younger sister. Her face flushed, her body going rigid and tense. "How dare you speak to me like that you criminal? You want this preposterous thing? Here. Go and fetch it yourself."
The bony brunette swung her arm back in preparation to throw the wand. Her expression was the closest thing to happiness Lily had seen on her face in a long time, and it made her nostalgic for the days when they were little girls. The two had been thick as thieves, always getting into trouble together.
A look of shock and horror almost immediately replaced the older girl's maniacal grin. She dropped the wand, and jumped up from the spot where she stood almost simultaneously, as if a white hot flame had reached out and touched her. Her body let out an involuntary shudder, the magic seeping from her frame. She scowled at the wand, and then she averted her gaze to her sister.
"Take this thing and get out of my sight. I don't want to see, or hear from you, ever, EVER AGAIN!" Petunia was shouting at this point, the hatred twisting her features into something dark and ugly. This was not the face that Lily had once stared into while they played dolls or dress-up together. This was someone different.
With anguish in her eyes, Lily realized that things between them would never be as they were before. Her acceptance letter to Hogwarts had marked the beginning of the end of their bond. Dumbledore's polite rejection to her sister's various pleas to be allowed into the school had ensured that. The envy Petunia had felt twisted her up too badly inside for things to ever be peaceful between them again.
"Fine. I'll never bother you again Petunia. But I want you to know this before I leave. While I cannot blame all of our quirelles on you, it's you and your jealousy that did this to us. We once shared everything. Please just know that this too, I would have shared with you, had you let me. Take care of yourself, dear sister. I know one day you'll be able to make this all up to me somehow." Lily slowly walked towards her wand and bent over to pick it up; giving Petunia time to process what was just said.
She risked a look at her, and then dropped her eyes back down to the ground again when she realized Petunia's demeanor had not changed one bit. "Bye Tuney." Lily whispered as she retreated back towards her own home, feeling quite defeated.
Lily didn't allow herself to look back again, not wanting the tears that brimmed in her eyes to actually spill over. She broke into a run, and allowed the crisp fall wind to whip her hair around, as if it were dancing with the leaves. The pounding of the pavement beneath her sneakers drown out all conscious thought, as the sparkling sunlight dried her tears. Deep down she realized that at this point her life would change forever. The black abyss of the unknown clawed at her very soul, and every shadow of doubt crept into her body, hitting her in her stomach like she had just received a crippling blow from some unseen force. This day marked a new beginning for Lily Evans, but what this was the beginning of, she still had yet to find out.