Hey this one is from 1st person. I promise some 3rd person and changing pov. The name is what I originally saved the story under in my computer. If you have a better name let me know.

XxXxX

He can not love. He can not love. He can not love. No matter how many times I say that, I can not even believe it. He loved me and I loved him.

Why? Of all the people in the world why him? I mean come on. I could have fallen for anyone else. Anyone in the world. A billion or so people in the world, and I meet him. Why?

Ok, I avoided anything like love. He avoid it also. One of us fell and dragged the other with them. I guess we had a revenge plot in mind. You make me fall in love, I make you fall in love also. At lest we did not drag anyone into this.

Well he did bring his friends into this. I mean we spent a lot of time with them. I was just fine with no one knowing about us. I mean I was not ashamed, just a little confused. I had never been here before. I had never loved anyone the way I loved him.

I loved him and it was scary sometimes. I mean the way I needed him. The way I would freak out if he was gone on a case, and I did not hear from him for a long time. He had told me about the time he had been kidnapped. That time he had died and been brought back to life. What could happen to him in a few hours on the job scared me. Especially since it had happened to him before.

Once again, HE COULD NOT LOVE. HE DID NOT LOVE ME. I DID NOT LOVE HIM. No matter how many times I say that, I can not believe that we did not have love.

We had been in love. That is why there is so much pain. I wake up and I think about how it ended. Why had we both let go? I still loved him then. I still love him now. I guess I am still a little confused. I mean I hate him for how much I love him some days. Other days I love him so much I am in pain. Still there are days I am happy we let go because it was for the best. At lest on those days, I think it was for the best.

Maybe bi-polar would be a better word for what I am now. I make it to work. I make it home. I look at a cell phone with his number in it. It has my friends' numbers and his friends' numbers. I could call one of them. I could have one of his friends tell me how he is doing, and if he misses me. I could call my friends and ask them if they want to hang out. I decide every day to just go to bed and not use that cellphone. I only have one number I want to call and I will not call him.

I was a normal person before that day in the coffee shop. I was completely normal. I mean you looked up the dictionary definition of normal, and saw a picture of me. I have a normal regular job were I do not travel. I have good befits and a good boss. I have friends. My friends and I use to hang out every weekend. I had a perfectly normal life. Then he happened to me, and my life went far from normal.

He has a really weird job. He travels every week. He was the definition of weird. He is a genius. He is the youngest FBI profiler ever. I mean how much more weird could you get? Well I guess he is still the definition of weird. He was not as changed as I was. He gave me something so great, and he took away my normal. While he gave me his love, I was fine not being normal. Now his love and my normal are both gone.

What do I have to show for giving up my normal? A bunch of heart ache. I do not even have a photograph of us. We took a few but all of them were on his friends cameras. They promised to send copies. Before they sent the promised copies, we ended. It took them forever to get those pictures to me. So long that I never got them.

I guess I still have my shell of normal. I still have the normal friends. I still have the normal job. My life is still normal. Yet now I know I am alone. It feels hollow when someone you love leaves you. I had love and love that could last but it just disappeared.

Why did he leave me alone and empty? I am a great person. I go the extra mile. I work as hard as possible. I tried to make it work. He is just so mean and horrible. He has not heart. He can not feel. He is just so... completely wonderful. I guess I love everything I hate about him.

Love does not exist. No I will not believe that. I refuse to let him take this also. I can not and will not lose my faith in love. That faith in love keeps me going. Maybe there is new love around the corner.

I did not love him. I did not love him. I DID NOT LOVE HIM! There is only one problem with that lie. I know I did love him. I also know that I love him. So I did not love him is slightly true. I still love him so it is more present tense than past tense. I guess that lie might stick. Yeah I would believe that lie if the moon was made of cheese.

I guess I should drag myself into bed. I guess tomorrow I can figure a lie out tomorrow. If not tomorrow, the day after tomorrow. I guess some day I will figure out a lie and move past him. I am not sure when but I hope soon. Well I am not really sure of anything any more.

"Hey Baby, It is the love of your life. If you can hear this, please pick up. I am on the other end wanting to talk to you. I.." Says his all too familiar voice.

I pick up the phone and answer it. I curse myself for not changing his ring tone. We had made matching ring tones to go with our phones. We thought it was cute. Now it is pain and torture to hear his ring tone with his voice. I was glad I could get to the phone when I did. I could not survive hearing those three little words that lit up my world but now tear it down.

"Hey" He breathes over the phone.

"Hey" I say back.

"Reeve, I need to see you as soon as possible. I need to talk to you." he says back with desperation.

He had never told me he had ever needed anything. He never told me he needed me or to that he needed to see me. For that reason alone I answer with "How about in 2 hours at our usual spot?"

The other line goes silent. "Spencer?" I ask wondering if he is still there.

"Sure." He says and hangs up.

I get ready. I drive to our location. I arrive a little early and see that he arrived early also. "Hey" we breathe together.

XxXxX

So that's all folks, until next time. I also have the entire story plot in my mind. It just has to make it to my computer.