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Drowning. He was drowning. He was going to die. It was a ridiculous end, really. He'd always imagined something far greater. Something more impressive than being caught by a bunch of Raterians that a grudge against Obi-wan. They had abducted Anakin by endangering civilians, then captured him when he'd showed up.
He didn't want to die. Less for himself than for all whom he would leave behind. He wondered how long it would take for Obi-wan to find him. Not long, he was sure. When he didn't come back, Obi-wan would just look at the security tapes, or the Raterians would tell him. He wouldn't get there in time. Halfheartedly he tugged at the chain attached to his ankle. He knew it wouldn't break; he didn't have the Force, thanks to the collar around his neck. perhaps he could have broke it with his mechanical hand, had it not been smashed by his captures. He knew he had a while yet. Jedi could hold their breath an unnaturally long time. He was even better than most. It still wouldn't be enough. He wondered what would happen after his death. Obi-wan would find him soon enough, and no doubt would be heartbroken. Anakin hated that he would hurt his master like that, but there was nothing he could do. Obi-wan would probably never forgive himself, or at least would be emotionally scarred for life.
Anakin winced in pain as the water surged against his many wounds. If only there was something he could do to help his former master, and Ahsoka, and… and Padme. She would be alone, particularly when she had twins. His children. He would never live to see them now. They would grow up fatherless. Anakin was suddenly struck with an idea. Using what little energy he could yet summon, he began to enact his plan. And finally, when he finished, he had nothing left to give. He closed his eyes, and let out what little air he had left, sending out one final thought.
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Obi-wan ran faster than he had ever run in his life. He was terrified. When Bakrin, a Raterian from his past, had told him what had happened, he had been more scared than ever before. He had ran, ran as fast as he could, desperate to get to Anakin before it was too late. He could deal with Bakrin later. Obi-wan practically flew, ruthlessly squashing the little voice inside him that whispered that he would be too late, that there was nothing he could do. Finally he reached the pond, and dove in, immediately spotting Anakin's limp form.
Obi-wan shattered the chain with the Force, then pulled his young partner to the surface. Obi-wan gasped for air, traumatized that Anakin wasn't doing the same. He flipped Anakin over, and immediately began rescue breaths, chest compresses. Anakin remained still. Frantic now, tears cascading down his face, he doubled his efforts, and then, just as he was about to give up, his arms gave out from under him, and he collapsed, exhausted and broken, onto Anakin's body. He held Anakin close, sobbing over all that was left of his little brother, his little brother who had so bravely taken the punishment meant for him. He should have died. Not Anakin. Never Anakin. Obi-wan cried over Anakin, using his own tears and the water covering the both of them to wipe away the blood covering ever inch of Anakin's body. No. Anakin couldn't be dead. He had a back-up plan. He always did. Obi-wan just had to wait for it, or try and figure out. But a small still voice inside of him whispered that Anakin was dead. That there was no backup plan. That this was it.
Obi-wan forced it away. Anakin was only… asleep. It was like the Rako Hardeen incident. That was it. Anakin was hurt, and he would need medical attention. But the voice wasn't finished. 'Denial.' it whispered. 'You're going into denial.' Obi-wan refused to believe this. Anakin wasn't dead. But the last bit of denial was being sucked from his body. No. He couldn't believe that Anakin was… gone. Just like Qui-gon. Siri. Satine. Oh what was wrong with him? Why did everyone he loved have to die? Why? Anakin would be alive if it weren't for him.
Obi-wan clutched Anakin's body close. He'd been so selfish. He hadn't been able to let Anakin go when the boy had been his padawan. And he had allowed the boy's attachment to grow beyond what it should have been, and he had to admit it was at least subconsciously because he didn't want to give Anakin up. And it had worked. Anakin had been attached to him, and they had become the team. Obi-wan had justified this by rationalizing that they made a great team, that it was logical for them to stay together. Inside he knew that he simply couldn't bear to let Anakin go. He wasn't ready. After Qui-gon had died Anakin had stayed beside him, had let him know that he wasn't alone. Anakin had become his center, his reason to live. And Bakrin had figured this out. He had broken Obi-wan's heart.
Obi-wan wept over Anakin's unmoving form, all too aware that if he had just been less attached then things would be different. But he hadn't been. And now Anakin was gone. Gone forever. Obi-wan cried himself out over Anakin's body that day, unable to accept that Anakin was gone, yet at the same time imagining Anakin's funeral service, his life without the boy. Anakin body going up in flames. Obi-wan pointedly kept his gaze away from the boys brilliant eyes, which were still open. The water current must have pulled them that way. For while he couldn't bear to look at them, he couldn't close them either. Closing them would be acknowledging that Anakin was dead, and he couldn't do that just yet. Obi-wan eventually fell limp over Anakin's form, unable to move.
Anakin would never laugh again, never pull Obi-wan into some supposedly safe flying machine, for the simple pleasure of making Obi-wan order him to slow down, giving Anakin the perfect opportunity to rail his former master about his fear of flying. Obi-wan shook with anger and pain.
How dare Bakrin kill Anakin? How dare he? Obi-wan felt something rising that he had only felt once before, when Qui-gon had died. He wanted Bakrin dead. Obi-wan's fingers tightened around Anakin's shoulders, and he pulled the boy close to his chest, burying his face in Anakin's hair. His entire being shook with rage, his vision beginning to shift to red. "I'll make him pay, Ani." he choked out. "Force help me, I'll make him pay!" Then. Then a small prod at the back of his mind. Anakin's presence. Obi-wan leached onto the sensation, desperate for any last bit of Anakin he could hold to. He nurtured the small sensation, till he could hold, nearly cradle it in his mind. Obi-wan felt tears leak from his red rimmed eyes, Anakin's last gift ripping his heart to shreds. For he knew that Anakin had made this possible. That this feeling was Anakin's last gift to him.
Obi-wan whimpered slightly, before realizing that it was more than a feeling. It was a message. Suddenly he was in a vision like state, with Anakin standing in front of him. He rushed to the boy, and enveloped him in his arms, crushing Anakin in his desperation. But the boy's fingers just ran themselves through Obi-wan's hair, then began to pry the man off of his body.
"I don't have long, master. And I do have a message for you." Obi-wan allowed Anakin to pull him off, and sat opposite his former padawan, the word former taking a now brutal meaning.
"Are… are you real?"
"Not really. I sort of just created this using the bond, he could access it a little, though not enough to call you, since some water got inside my collar. But this isn't very good, so I need to be fast. Look… I'm sorry. There are things I haven't told you." Anakin turned his face away, and Obi-wan felt an uneasy feeling grow inside his gut. "I'm married." 0_0 "Or I was, before I died. To Padme." Obi-wan gasped.
"What! Anakin how could you.." Obi-wan was lost for words. How could Anakin have betrayed him like that? How could Anakin have possibly done such a thing, he was sure there weren't even words to describe how he felt right now. Had Anakin not even trusted him enough to tell him this? "Anakin why didn't you tell me? What have I done that you would..." Obi-wan stopped at the tear that fell from Anakin's eye.
"I-I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you. I-if you told the council, you would be hurt because I'd be thrown out of the Jedi order, and you would feel terrible for that." Obi-wan began a protest, to tell Anakin that he'd never do such a thing as that, that his friends secret would be safe with him, but Anakin stopped him, mid word. "And if you'd kept my secret, you would have been lying to the council, and you would have hated that. Believe me, I wanted to tell you." Anakin looked up at him helplessly, begging. "I wanted to tell you so much, but, but, I didn't want to hurt you and… I thought you would be disappointed in me. Hate me." The last part was barely audible, but Obi-wan heard.
"What? Anakin I could never hate you." Anakin kept his face turned away, unconvinced. "Anakin, I love you." Anakin's entire body jerked, and he turned his now tear stained face to Obi-wan's.
"What?" Obi-wan reached forward, and pulled Anakin into a hug, holding the boy's body tight, pressing his face into Anakin's hair, this time with Anakin's breath warming his neck.
"I love you. And though I sometimes may be disappointed in what you do, I have never been disappointed in you Anakin. Don't you ever forget that." Anakin nodded into his master's chest, and whimpered quietly.
"I love you too." They stayed like that a bit, till Anakin collected himself. "Master, please. Please take care of Padme for me. She, she's going to have kids. Can you…" Obi-wan cut Anakin off, knowing there wasn't much time.
"Yes. Yes Anakin, I'll care for them as well as I can, I promise." Anakin seemed to relax then, and snuggled down into Obi-wan's arms. Obi-wan held tight to the boy's body, even as Anakin began to fade, becoming less and less substantial, till Obi-wan could barely hold him at all, but he had to hold him, because this was the last time he would ever see Anakin, and oh Force, why did the boy have to die? Anakin looked up at him, eyes shining, a gentle hand moving over Obi-wan's cheek. Obi-wan reached out, and Anakin took his master's hand in his own, gently kissing the palm.
"I love you too. I love…" Anakin Skywalker completely disappeared, and Obi-wan was left alone, with a hole in his heart.
