I always wanted to explore the connection between these two. I imagine that Hube plotting to send Conrad to war wasn't the first time he's done something to hurt the other. Also, I sort of imagine that the reason Hube fell in love with Nicola is because she looks a bit like Conrad and reminds him of Conrad. Perhaps when Hube was younger he was in love with Conrad but chose to channel that love into hate because of his pride and hatred for humans. (Also, Eru looks just like baby Conrad- too cute!) Enjoy!
When Eru runs to him with outstretched arms, a bright smile, and soft brown eyes, Hube has to turn away. The guilt makes him feel like he's being eaten alive as he makes an excuse for his son, that Nicola will be left to explain.
"Not now, Eru." Hube will say.
"Your father isn't feeling well," Nicola will say.
Try as he might, Eru will be (yet again) forced to play outside with whoever is available. Usually it's Greta, but Greta is a lot older than him- she prefers talking over playing and Eru grows bored.
However, sometimes there's Conrad.
Uncle Conrad, as Eru calls him. He's the busiest man in the whole kingdom, yet when he plays with Eru it never seems rushed. They always have lots of fun. So much so, that one day while Eru is playing with Conrad in the garden, he breaks down and cries and Conrad picks him up and shushes him.
"Eru, what's wrong?" He asks, tenderly.
Eru doesn't know how to say what he's feeling. It just hurts. Uncle Conrad is the busiest man in the whole kingdom and yet he still makes time for Eru.
He can't remember the last time his own father played with him.
"I want m-my dad..." Eru stutters through his tears and Conrad nods in understanding. "Alright," he declares with a smile. "Lets go get him."
Eru isn't even surprised, just disappointed when his father sputters and makes another excuse.
"I have a lot of work to do, Eru... You know that."
"Whatever work you had to do today," Conrad announces as he plops Eru into his father's awkward arms. "Is now my work. Take the day off on me, and spend some time with him."
Eru's small cheer of joy is too sincere for Hube to crush and Conrad's honey-brown gaze is too intense to defy, so he relents. However, Conrad knows Hube isn't happy as he allows his son to lead him outside into the garden.
"Conrart?" A small voice behind the man makes him turn his head. Nicola's thin fingers wrap around Conrad's arm as she gazes up at him.
"Please help him."
Conrad understands. Hube is regressing. Something is driving the man back into the depression he'd suffered before their son's birth and Nicola has tried everything. He knows she has, by the dark circles beneath her eyes.
"I'll do my best."
It's late when there's a knock on Hube's heavy mahogany door. Not the door to his room, but to his study. His wife and son are already fast asleep in their beds.
"Hube." It's Lord Weller and just the sound of his soft voice makes Hube's heart ache as he buries his face in his hands.
"Come in."
Before he knows it, the man himself is before him and Hube gasps at the sight of him. Lined only by the light of the dim candles about the room, Conrad is golden-brown and beautiful. He's become a fine man with no help at all on Hube's part.
"It's late." is all he says, tilting his head down at Hube, but Hube hears the unspoken question anyway: 'Why aren't you in bed with your family?'
"I can not sleep." he admits, leaning back in his desk. "Is there something I can assist you with?" he asks and is surprised when Conrad ignores his question completely.
"Do you hate him?"
There's a moment of silence as Hube processes this.
"Eru...?" He asks and his mouth hangs open, appalled, when Conrad only shifts his weight, waiting for an answer.
"I do not hate him." he tries to say forcefully but it comes out as a tremulous whisper. "He is my son..."
"Then why?" Conrad asks, crossing the room and coming so close to Hube that he can practically feel the other's body heat as he leans against his desk. "Why don't you touch him."
"I can't stand to... not when..."
There's a pause of heavy silence and Conrad glances down at him. The affect of the man's gaze on him is almost too much to handle.
"Because he's you." Hube says in a small, broken voice. "When I look at him all I see is you."
"Ah," Conrad clicks his tongue and smiles but his eyes are cold and hateful. "I see now... you don't hate him, you hate me-"
"No." Hube gasps. "I do not hate you, Conrart." he says the man's first name and it makes Conrad's cold smile fade into non-existence. "I don't understand." he says honestly and Hube stands, turning to face the younger man.
"Do you remember... how I treated you?" Hube asks and there's a flicker of enthrallment in Conrad's eyes as he looks at the other man.
"It's... hard to forget, Gegenhuber."
Hube swallows thickly.
"You were only a child," he continues, "and I was awful to you." he says, emotion thick in his remaining eye. "I look at Eru and all I can think is... if someone treats him the way that I treated you... I'll never forgive them."
There's a shift from confusion to understanding in Conrad's gaze. Hube is laying his thoughts and emotions out before him in a way he's never done before.
"His majesty has already forgiven you, before Eru was born. Why are you hung up on forgiveness now?" he asks and Hube shakes his head.
"His majesty has forgiven me but I have never apologized to you." he says, daring to reach a hand out and touch Conrad's shoulder. Although the man doesn't flinch away, Hube can feel how stiff his shoulder is from the contact.
The touch makes Conrad's mind flash back to all the times Hube visited the castle, (to see his cousin, Gwendal) when Conrad was a boy. Hube had been twice his size during those times and he hadn't been nice to little Conrart Weller at all.
In front of the courts or in front of Gwendal he would barely look at Conrad, ignoring him completely. However, if he ever caught the young half-Mazoku alone... Hube would demonstrate mercilessly how much he despised humans: and Conrad too.
He remembers running away from Hube countless times, only to be caught because he was too young and not fast enough to escape. Being beaten or told he didn't deserve to breathe the very air in his lungs. He remembers the time Hube smashed his violin, a gift from his father before the man had passed away and how long he'd cried afterwards. Gwendal had found out and had beat Hube violently for it but it had done nothing to change the man's attitude towards him.
"Conrart." Hube speaking his name tenderly brings him back to the present as Conrad shifts away. He isn't afraid of Hube; now that he can rely on himself for protection, but the extended contact is still too much to handle.
"I do not expect your forgiveness." he says quietly. "However, I want you to know how sorry I am for the way I treated you. You were a child, I was old enough to know better and you did not deserve it." he says resolutely.
When Conrad says nothing, the man continues to speak, pouring his heart out.
"I look at Eru's innocent smile and all I can think about is how when you were a child your smile looked just the same. You smiled at me the same way the first day I met you and I hated you anyway. You would have adored me without question, just as you adored your brothers if I had given you the chance but instead I've caused you nothing but pain."
He closes his lone eye and in the dim candlelight Conrad can see a tear threatening to escape from the man's dark lashes.
"How am I suppose to look at my son and tell him that I love him, when I know that I would have easily treated him the same way I treated you, years ago?"
Conrad doesn't know what to say. It was a long time ago and he's a grown man now. Things were different between them now. Weren't they? After all, he had spared the man's life.
Was that not forgiveness?
"Eru doesn't deserve a selfish father and Nicola doesn't deserve a selfish husband." Conrad finally says, his arms crossed as he looks down at Hube's feet. "It's selfish of you to hold onto these thoughts and feelings when it's so obviously affecting your family."
Hube slumps back into his chair, as if spilling out his emotions has left him drained of the energy to stand. "I don't deserve them." he says in a whisper, letting his head roll to the side.
Conrad moves so fast it takes Hube's breath away when he's grabbed roughly by the front of his shirt. Suddenly, the younger man is leaning over him, eyes filled with a fiery anger Hube has never seen before, especially not in the calm-tempered second son.
"You're still being selfish!" he hisses in a barely contained whisper between them, "Do you know how old my father was when he died? How old I was?" Hube's hand grips Conrad's upper arm out of shock, to steady himself as he's pressed back into the chair.
"Eru has a father who is alive and will live for a long time." Conrad says, his face inches from the other man's. "I watched him cry the other day because he missed you so damn much. Work? You weren't working. Your son was crying for you and what are you doing?"
Hube only stares, speechless.
"You were wallowing. Drowning yourself in guilt, too preoccupied with how you feel to worry about how it's making him feel."
There's a tiny knock on the door that startles both men as the door creeks open to reveal a soft round face, pinched with worry, poking through the crack.
"Eru-!" Hube says, though he doesn't attempt to move from his chair as he watches Conrad's face in amazement at how, (as easily as adorning a mask) Conrad's expression goes from heated anger to tender concern.
"You're still up?" Conrad asks playfully but it does nothing to ease the worried look on the boy's face.
"I heard noises..." he says, eyes darting apologetically between them.
"I'm sorry, Eru." Hube says and Conrad moves back so the man can stand.
"Why are you here, Uncle Conrad?" the boy asks as his father gently picks the child up, trying to ignore the way his son looks more like a relative to Weller than of his own blood.
"Just visiting." Conrad says with a smile that doesn't reach his eyes. It goes unnoticed by Eru who smiles back. "But I should get going. It's bed-time, after all."
Eru frowns at this but can't complain because he's suddenly overtaken by a large yawn and Hube bows his head to the younger man. "Please excuse me, Lord Weller." he says, taking his son to the door.
"We'll talk later." Conrad says as he waves to the child. "Bye, Eru."
"Bye bye~" the boy says sleepily and with a smile, as his father disappears with him down the hall.
A week goes by and Conrad notices a change in Hube's behavior, but it's not enough.
He spends more time with his family, he hugs his son, he smiles, but his smiles are weak and false and Nicola looks more distressed than ever. So Conrad plays baseball with Yuuri, braids Greta's hair, goes for a walk with Yozak and wonders why it's up to him to try and fix Lord Gegenhuber Grisela.
It's an immature thought that's over before it begins because Conrad knows why. He knows Hube has changed the most out of any man he's known, even more than his younger brother, Wolfram. He knows Eru and Nicola need help and Conrad's in the position to provide it.
He knows how to make it better, too.
He just... doesn't necessarily want to.
If only because there's a small child that's beaten and terrified, hiding within Conrad's heart that whispers 'No.' and tells him in a tremulous voice that he doesn't want to forgive, that he shouldn't have to.
So he sits in the shade of a tree in the palace garden and watches the flowers and tries to convince himself to forgive the man, deep within his heart that's full of scars. It takes all day and Conrad falls asleep there, a pained look etched upon his face.
When he's awoken, it's Yuuri's bright, dark eyes that are looking into his own. A smile reaches Conrad's lips before his eyes can catch up.
"Are you alright, Conrad?" Yuuri asks, his hand outstretched, waiting for Conrad to take it. He notes that the sun is just fading below the horizon and that his shirt is damp with sweat from a dream he can't remember.
"Yes... I was just... dreaming." he says, before giving his godson an apologetic look and taking the boy's outstretched hand, allowing the shorter man to help him up. "Have you seen Hube, your majesty?"
Yuuri smiles and walks with Conrad to the castle. "It's Yuuri, Conrad!" He chides and Conrad can't help but relax as he falls into a comfortable sense of familiarity with his godson. "He was looking for you earlier but I guess no one thought to look for you in the garden." he says, turning to the taller man. "Are things ok between you guys?"
Conrad can't help the chuckle that escapes his lips as he places a hand on Yuuri's shoulder. Yuuri wasn't as naive as some thought he was, his king likely noticed the tension between them lately.
"Things will be O.K." he says in a practiced American accent, making Yuuri laugh. "I'll make sure of it."
"Alright." Yuuri says, "I believe you."
It's late once more, but Hube isn't in his study. He's wandering the halls of Blood Pledge castle, feeling haunted by memories that were birthed to him within its walls. In every shadow he sees a small child who looks like his son: gentle, innocent, and terrified of him.
Memories of when he use to be a monster in this castle.
His feet bring him to Lord Conrart Weller's bedroom door and the man feels rising panic in his chest as his hand hovers over it's worn, wooden surface.
"Hube."
He jumps, because the voice he'd been dreading and hoping to hear all day is suddenly right beside him.
"Lord Weller." He says, trying to hold up a level of formality. "I was looking for you..."
"And I, you." He says, holding out his arm for Hube to take; a sign of companionship. "Would you mind walking with me?" Hube can't say no, because he knows the man is trying and it's more than he deserves.
So he nods eagerly and takes the offered limb. They silently walk arm-in-arm, side by side through the quiet hallways of Blood Pledge Castle. This lasts only until they reach an empty ballroom, massive and sparkling in the moonlight and Conrad lets go of Hube so he can walk ahead of the man onto its mirrored surface.
It's a long moment before he finally speaks.
"When you look at Eru, you see me." Conrad says, spinning on his heel so he can face the man. It's a statement that's true and Hube only lowers his head, ashamed.
"Has it ever occurred to you that, you're not seeing me at all; only what I use to be?"
Hube's brow furrows in thought as Conrad continues.
"I'm going to show you what you've done to me." He says, as he draws his sword and points it at the other man. "I can not forgive you until you know what kind of man I have become. Take this as your punishment, Gegenhuber, for the wrongs you had bestowed upon me."
Hube doesn't draw his blade, he simply waits for Conrad to act and briefly thinks that should Lord Weller strike him down, killing him right here, it would be justified. Hube would understand. He would accept it as payment and punishment, for Julia and for everything he's done to this man so that the grand scales of the world would be balanced and his son could live a just life, unplagued by a hypocritical father.
So when Conrad moves forward, his blade striking sharp and true at Hube's heart, he doesn't flinch and doesn't blame the younger man for exacting a revenge that's long overdo.
But instead, it's a blow to the face he receives and when his back hits the stone floor Conrad is over him, shouting at him once again. It wasn't his blade, but his fist that had struck the older demon and Hube is surprised that the man could forego the temptation to end his life for the third time.
"I do not hate you!" Is the first stream of words Hube can comprehend the other man saying, "But, damn it all! I can and will hate you if you take your life for granted one more time!" He shouts, and Hube is shocked to see tears forming in the man's tender brown eyes.
Hube doesn't deserve Conrad's tears, his forgiveness or his sympathy. He doesn't deserve his beautiful little boy or his loving human wife. But Conrad cries anyway and Hube hasn't seen the man cry for any small reason. Such a strong man's tears are hard to look at and Hube can feel nothing but foolish when he realizes their reason:
Conrad truly wants him to find happiness.
Despite their past, despite his own feelings and despite the fact Hube doesn't deserve it.
Hube trampled upon this man countless times and yet his heart was still the beautiful and tender heart of the child that he use to be. Despite everything, Conrad hasn't changed. Hube hasn't broken him after all; or if he did, someone must've fixed him, because he's crying for Gegenhuber: his monster.
Hube stands with difficulty as Conrad tries furiously to wipe the tears from his eyes. To Hube, he is a child all over again. Only this time he won't let the boy down as he gathers the younger man into his arms and holds him tightly.
He regrets not having chose this path when he was younger. He could have been allowed to hold this man's heart close to his own, to share in his secrets, hopes and dreams. He could have earned Conrad's warm smile and boyish adoration. He could have had Conrad in his life.
Perhaps, he could have even saved him from moments of pain and heartache.
It's too late for that now, Hube knows this for a fact when Conrad pulls away all too soon and with too much force.
"I forgive you," He says roughly, his eyes angry and sad. His scarred hands on Hube's chest, pushing them apart. "But you must forgive yourself so you can be in their lives. I will not forgive you a second time if you chose to throw that away."
Hube nods as tears threaten to slip down his own cheeks, for he too, feels like a child again. He squeezes Conrad's arms in his hands as a sign of conformation and thanks.
"I love him." He says and Conrad's smile is something beautiful. Hube wants Eru to grow into a beautiful, smiling young man, too.
"I believe you."
Eru is nearly as tall as his mother now, who's hair is showing bits of grey here and there.
Even Uncle Conrad is starting to age and Eru is surprised to see the chiseled lines around the man's eyes and the thin white wisps of hair mixed among the brown atop his scalp. He's still just as lively as ever though. When they spar Eru can't keep up and it always leaves him out of breath.
His father looks the same as he always has, and for that, Eru is thankful. He can rely on his father not to change. They spend time together often and the thought that his father isn't going anywhere, (when it's clear that his mother and Uncle Conrad, even Greta eventually will be...) comforts him.
They take long walks, him and his parents. Sometimes one or both of them at once. This time, Eru walks alone with his father down a faded path in the garden, arm-in-arm. His father tells him a story that Eru has heard in whispers from others before but never from his parents, about a time when his father wasn't the warmhearted, understanding, patient, loving man he is today.
"I understand." He says, squeezing his fathers trembling hand at the end of the man's heartfelt tale.
"You changed. That's all that matters."
Hube watches his son smile and it's bright, warm and beautiful.
He sees the truth: he has changed. It is all that matters.
"I believe you." He says to his son as they share a moment of true happiness and peace.
