For startled_always: Prompt: Quinn writes a letter/letters to Beth.

Because you were right to say that Glee rushed past that plotline.

For those who don't know: I wrote a collection of love letters from Santana to Brittany. The series is called "Dear Brittany". Since then I've started accepting requests for letters.

Dear Beth,

School has just started again and not a single day went by since your birth, in which I didn't think about you.

Everyone else's minds are in New York already and we haven't even qualified for Nationals, yet. They are singing and dancing and laughing and I do my best to sing and dance and laugh along. I don't want to burden them, take away their enthusiasm, their jollity. They should be able to enjoy being the toddlers they really are. There is no need to drag them down with me.

Also, none of them understands what it's like to give birth to a miracle and then lose it. They don't know what it's like to feel connected to a living creature that is by heredity a part of you.

They never even ask about you, no one but Puck…occasionally. They are quite incurious.

Please don't take this wrong. If you ever get the chance to meet any of them, please know that I don't blame them for anything. Highschool is tough for each of us and everybody has their own demons to fight.

They don't know any better. They are so young. They are as young as I was when you were born.

I only got to spend so little time with you, but I remember every detail: How your little fingers grabbed my hair and how there was innocence, pureness written all over your perfect little face. I remember the exact sound of your voice. It's burned into both my brain and heart. So is your scent. A perfect mixture of sweetness and you and me and something else I can only describe as a unique kind of perfection. Like the water from the fountain of youth.

When I looked into your eyes I could see myself, my future and my past. I could see the whole universe falling quiet in perfect harmony. There was not a single noise disturbing this moment with you. I have never seen anything remotely as beautiful.

I remember the few tiny blonde hairs on your head and how fluffy they were. I could have spent hours just stroking your head, having you pressed against my chest, singing you lullabies.

There will come a day, Beth, when you will ask yourself "why". Why did my mom give me up? Why didn't she want me?

Beth, I wanted you. I wanted you with all my heart. There is nothing more in the world that I ever wanted as much as I wanted you.

Giving you away was the hardest, the most excruciating thing I have ever done and there's a part in me that will forever remain empty. That is the part where you are supposed to be.

My soul is yearning for you, crying out every night, because you are not here.

And yet, I did this for both of us.

I will sound as if I'm making up excuses, but, Beth, how can I give you a family, when I don't have a family myself? When I don't have a safe haven how can I be yours? How can I be a parent when no one ever really was mine? What would I have to teach you?

Maybe I'm just a toddler, too. And yes, maybe I'm selfish. You have all the right in the world to think of me that way.

I just hope that one day you may be able to forgive me.

But even more than that I hope that you have parents who love you and who care for you. I hope they treat you like the miracle you are. You deserve to have every wish of yours fulfilled. Every dream of yours shall come true.

Every wish I have I will send to you, because there's nothing else I want in life than for you to be happy.

Please be happy.

Love,

Quinn