Forgotten Heart
Reincarnation . . . is a hard thing to believe in. Most say that lovers will always be reincarnated in the next life and will always meet again at some point in their lives.
But what about the ones who died with an unrequited love still gripping and choking at their hearts? They die with regret, perhaps even died without knowing that their loved one will probably never even remember them.
They will forever be in regret, forced to forever wander the earth searching for their lost love, never to know what the love with their beloved will feel like.
However, it is said that there was an Innocence with the power to grant any wish its owner asked, as long as the owner fulfilled one condition. What the condition was is unknown to all, except for the user.
I wish to be with him forever
Even if he doesn't know me
Even if my love is unrequited
I wish to be by his side always
. . .
Servant and Bodyguard
(1st person POV)
It all began a long time ago. You were the princess's bodyguard, I was her right-hand maid. You were an experienced man of war; I was a clumsy servant always getting yelled at by my mistress. You were a cold man with dark blue eyes and long raven hair, yet at some points you were kind and gentle.
Although it may seem childish, but I fell in love with you at first sight. I loved the way how you handle things, simple and straight forward; no beating around the bush. I love how strong you are, in mind and in body. I love how you scowl when the food isn't to your liking or when the other maid-servants are being too noisy. I loved everything about you.
It is true, you do seem to have a bad mood almost everyday, but I know how caring you can be when you want to.
Because of you, I started to enjoy working at the palace. I learned to treasure what I had now, instead of longing for something far out of my reach. Everything I learned at the palace was now becoming better and brighter for me, because you were there.
Sometimes I feel like a weak, pathetic, and invisible to the world. But you were there to pull me out of my dark corner and to show me what blessings I had. You cheered me up in a simple, yet gentle way.
Everyday my love for you grew more and more. Yet I didn't have the courage to speak to you. I thought I wasn't worthy to be held in your arms.
Throughout my life people have told me that I was ugly. Even as I grow, I still hear those insults. Though now it is becoming lesser as I don't pay attention to them anymore. But now I keep asking myself, were those insults that important that I didn't ask you?
This little lack of confidence wasn't the only thing keeping me away from confessing to you. There was one more problem that I had.
It was the fact that the princess loved you too and that you loved her also. Why? I'll probably never know. It seemed like the whole palace knew, which was dangerous, considering how she is a princess.
When I first found out, I ran out of the palace, out of the city and into the meadow where I wept out my heart to the earth. The wind stung my teary eyes and the cold nipped at my numb fingers, but I couldn't feel anything anymore. My heart felt shattered and my world grew dull for that moment.
That was when I saw something glowing nearby in a river. The green glowing light, which I had thought to be a jewel, turned out to be a round emerald emitting a luxurious luminance. When I touched it, I felt like lightning was running through my body and a voice called out to me.
"I can grant you a wish,
Any wish you want,
For a price."
At first I thought it was probably just my imagination, so I shook out those thoughts, took the gem with me and went back to the dreaded palace. I could hear the thunder rolling and saw the lightning cracking in a distance. Rain was coming and I had to hurry.
As I ran past the city gates, I was already soaking wet from the storm. I was shivering cold; I couldn't feel my lips or toes as I ran on. My vision was becoming blurry, but I could barely make out the palace gates.
The streets were empty. Of course, whoever walks out in the middle of this storm would have to be a fool.
But there you were, waiting at the palace gates looking over the horizon as if looking for a lost person. When you saw me, you quickly ran up and threw your cloak over me. I could hear you reprimanding me for running out in a storm like this, but I didn't care. I said I was sorry and that it wouldn't happen again, but deep inside, I was happy that you were waiting for me.
The days went on, even if I had tried to, I couldn't forget you. I couldn't let go of the love I had for you. And who am I to tell you to not love the princess? You were happy with her and what could I say? All I could do was stand there and smile and wish that the pain will leave soon, but it never did.
Then one day as I sat at the pavilion mending the princess's scarf, you came to me and talked as if we were friends for a long time. You said you were going to cause a revolt against the king.
Apparently, the king was going to force his daughter into a marriage with another prince of a different country. Being in love with her, you decided to fight for your love.
I couldn't lie and say I wasn't worried. A revolt was like a small war within the country. There was every possibility that you would die.
I counted the days until your destined rebellion. When it came, I couldn't even sleep a wink. I spent the whole night worrying about you. I kept clutching onto the green gem-now tied to a red cord around my neck-tightly.
The cries of your men fighting against the palace guards were deafening. The maid-servants ran out of the palace in fear for their own lives. The princess was locked in her room, but even so, her calls for her lover were still heard through those barred doors. Soon all the servants were gone and the palace was left with only soldiers fighting each other.
The king had known that you were going to rebel against him. He had a trap set for you, an invisible one that you couldn't see. I wanted to warn you, I tried to. But everything was in vain. So instead, I wanted to let you live.
I could still remember the arrow piercing through my heart as I shielded you from the sudden attack. I could see your face looking down at me with a more-than worried expression. Your eyes were wide and dark midnight blue, a beautiful color.
"I can grant you any wish you want.
Any wish you want,
For a price."
I heard that mysterious voice again. My eyes were feeling very heavy now. My breathing was slowing down and I could feel my life fading away in your arms.
"I wish . . ."
My lips trembled and my tears flowed non-stop. I didn't want you to die, but I didn't want to leave your side either. How I wish to have told you before about how I felt. Perhaps when you rejected me, all would be over. But deep inside, I knew, even if you did reject me, I would still have loved you.
I kept hearing you call my name. The revolt was over. You were going to be executed the very next day with your princess forced to watch. The guards were coming to take you away from my dying body. I can still remember seeing your teary and bloody face, your hand trying to reach out to me.
Although I know this probably isn't an act of love, yet I was still hanging onto that little thread of hope that you had a bit of feelings for me. My hand, very weakly, went up and caressed your cheek.
"I love you."
Then my eyes closed and they never opened again in that life.
Your wish . . .
I wish to be with him forever,
To protect him,
To love him,
To help him,
As long as I am by his side,
Everything will be alright.
Very well, Forever
You will be reincarnated
With these mournful memories
You will wander the earth with him
However, you will meet dire problems
And sometimes,
You will not succeed
You will continue to be reincarnated beside him
Until he accepts your love,
will you finally die in peace
Your price . . .
Is that you will never be a normal human being
Using me as your Innocence,
Means you will be an Exorcist for the rest of your life
Never will you live a peaceful life
Forever, you will fight against akuma
And risk your life for a world who will never remember you
Whatever happens to me doesn't matter
As long as I can be with him
Everything else is meaningless
Then so be it.
Hi Everyone ^^
Thank you very much for reading Forgotten Heart.
I wrote this while listening to BrunuhVille's Our Farewell, so it sounds angsty, but don't worry, there will be a happy ending.
Please rate and review~! I'd really like to know what you all think about it. Thanks and cookies to all readers~!