A/N: This is my first fan fic. I'm writing this with the hopes that it will cure a debilitating case of writer's block I have over my novel. I hope you enjoy it.Props to Ms. Harris, and thanks for the inspiration. I am humbly borrowing her characters.

Chapter One

I sat on my front porch swing, sipping iced tea and watching the fireflies dance around.

I'd worked the lunch shift at Merlotte's that day and it has been a busy one. My brother, Jason, brought the whole road crew in for burgers, and then an impromptu wedding reception filled the rest of the tables. The Baptist church flooded in the storm that the road crew was cleaning up after. Funny how things work out like that in small towns.

Anyway, it was a busy shift and tips were pretty good, so I can't complain. I do much better with busy than not busy, considering my handicap. It's hard keeping my shields up against all those stray thoughts, but once they're up they pretty much stay there until I tell them to switch off. When there aren't many people around and I'm a little bored, it's easy to forget. By the end of a busy day though, my brain is usually ready to melt.

My whole body ached by the time I dragged myself home around five, so I decided to just relax for a while. I changed into a pair of comfy sleep pants and a tank top and make a big batch of sweet tea. As I sat there on the swing, idling the minutes away, I found myself unable to keep my thoughts away from a certain vampire. This was happening a lot over the past few months. Every time I slowed down for more than a few hours, I just started day dreaming about brushing his hair or taking a shower with him or hearing him whisper in my ear. My lover. So I just never let myself relax.

Instead, I ended up taking lots of extra shifts at Merlotte's, and I helped out a lot with my friend Tara and her new twins. She was a little overwhelmed with her husband JD off taking training classes in Shreveport every day after work. He wanted to become a physical therapist, God bless his little heart. I love helping out with those little babies and smelling their heads and rocking them to sleep, but being around them so much just reminded me of how far away I was from my own goals in life.

I mean, let's face it - I love my job and I'm damn good at it, but I've never fooled myself into believing it's important or anything. I know I'm attractive enough and even if I could lose a little on the hips, I have it on good authority that plenty of men wouldn't mind taking me home. But crazy Sookie isn't wife material. I don't really have any friends anymore, now that I've got Vamp Girl tattooed over my forehead. I had my brother, but Jason was practically engaged to his latest girlfriend, Michelle, and they still enjoyed their own company a little too much for me to just pop in. I saw Bill on occasion, if I went walking after sunset or if he came into the bar, but we still weren't very comfortable with our new friendship and our visits were always pretty short. How much can you honestly say to a man that you know still loves you but you're dating his boss? Awkward, to say the least.

Basically, I was all alone, which brings me back to my original problem.

There I was, swinging away, sitting where Gran had sat for so many years. I always did this when there was something bothering me - find a spot that used to be my Gran's and try to put my feet back on the ground. I knew she would've supported any decision I made, but she'd also have been the first one to remind me that one doesn't change her life sitting on a front porch swing. I needed to put my big girl panties back on and get a hold of myself, I knew that. I needed to stop feeling sorry for myself and just get on with life, as normal as it could be being a telepathic barmaid with a string of supernatural ex-boyfriends. But knowing it and doing it, I found, were two totally different problems.

I let out a sigh and sipped my iced tea. It was at that precise moment when the biggest problem of all pulled into my driveway.

Eric Northman's cherry red Corvette purred to a halt in front of me and my breathing got faster. My stomach lurched, but I tried to maintain my relaxed demeanor. I hadn't seen Eric in almost six months, and before that it had been another three. Saying that I was upset was an understatement. Yet as he stepped out of his car and I saw his face after so long, all those lusty, familiar feelings I had for him came pouring over me. I had almost forgotten how striking he was, with his long layers of golden hair and eyes the color of an ancient glacier. He was tall and very broad shouldered and it was easy to picture him in his original Viking furs and armor.

On that day, he was wearing skinny jeans and a black leather jacket, despite the fact that it was nearly seventy-five degrees. (Silly vampires and their low body temperatures.) His fingers hung in his belt loops as he slowly climbed the front porch steps.

"Hello, Sookie." His voice was quiet and low.

I took another sip of my tea and stared out at the front yard. "Mr. Northman."

"How have you been?"

My voice was cool. "Just fine."

He let out a long sigh and I could tell already that he was restraining himself. "I've missed you," he said after a moment.

"Well, I wouldn't know."

That wasn't true and we both knew it. I had felt his loneliness through our blood bond. Sometimes I was sad because he was feeling sad. Or I'd become incredibly angry for no reason, only to realize that it wasn't me feeling it at all. He got especially pissed off when I refused gifts, delivered by Pam of course. Yet every time I got so much as a glimmer of his real emotions, they'd get ripped away and replaced by the usual "I'm busy, all is well" vibe that regularly got sent to me from his brain.

"Sookie, look at me." I sighed and reluctantly turned my eyes to his. "My absence was unavoidable. I apologize."

Now, I was willing to bet that Eric Northman could count on one hand the number of times he'd said those words together in a sentence. That fact wasn't lost on me, but at that moment, I didn't much care about his feelings.

"You apologize?" I repeated.

"It wasn't my intention to anger you."

I felt my cool melting as I slanted my eyes at him and screwed my mouth up into a pout. "Then what were your intentions? Because I thought we were done playing games."

"I have no desire to argue with you. That's not why I'm here."

"Why are you here?" My words were sounding a bit more brutal than I really wanted them to.

"There are things happening that you need to be aware of," he said.

"I'm doing just fine here, Eric, so you can get back into your little car and drive away into the darkness again."

The muscles in his jaw flexed and he cleared his throat. (He looked so sexy when he did that. I had to get a hold of myself!) "This is going to be a long conversation if you're going to act childish."

"I'm not acting childish," I cried out. "You hurt me and I am damn well allowed to be upset about it. You left me again, Eric. There's no amount of diamonds or firewood or new hot water heaters that will make up for you not being here." He tried to speak but I held my hand up in protest and kept going. "And so you know, I am way past being angry. I just don't care anymore."

He leaned against the wooden pillar next to his shoulder and let one corner of his mouth curl up in a tiny, rueful smile. "You're still a terrible liar."

I sighed again. He was right, of course. I was an awful liar and I couldn't even look at him, especially when I thought of the flat screen television currently hanging in my bedroom. "Things change," I said.

"Not this. I would know."

I felt my throat tightening as I held back tears. "Then you know how miserable I've been. You feel it in your blood just like I do, Eric. Every time I let myself care about you, you up and disappear again."

He didn't say anything, which was strange. He was usually pretty amused by my tirades. Either that, or he got completely annoyed, but this time there wasn't a single emotion on his face. He just stood there, digging his hands into his pockets and looking kind of humble. Eric did not do humble. I could tell something was brewing, but I ignored my gut feeling and kept ranting.

"It's been six months! I know that's like a coffee break to you guys, but to me that's a long time. Not a phone call or a letter or even text message!"

"I know."

"Do you realize that I've seen Pam more over the past year than I've seen you?"

His eyes narrowed a bit and he stepped closer to me. "I have done everything in my power to ensure your safety and well being."

"Making Bubba or Bill sit in my woods all night long does not ensure my well being," I shouted at him. "Putting money in my bank account does not ensure my well being!"

In a blur of vampire speed, he was suddenly in front of me. I jumped and dropped my glass of tea. His face was inches away from mine as he hovered over me, his hands braced on the swing's armrests. "Do you doubt my feelings for you, woman?" he demanded, his voice nearly a hiss.

I slouched into the seat a bit - I couldn't help it. I'd been away from him for so long, I'd nearly forgotten what he was. I knew Eric would not hurt me, but he never hesitated in reminding me of his primal nature. I fought the urge to fear him as he glowered at me, the tips of his fangs just peeking out from under his lips. Gently touching his pale cheek, his gaze immediately softened, then his fangs retracted and he reached up to hold my hand against his skin.

"No, of course not," I said. "I don't expect barbeques and bowling dates, but I'm a girl, Eric. I need a little more than just a feeling from fifty miles away. I want to lay in bed with you and talk about our days and watch movies with you and-"

"Be human," he said begrudgingly.

I shrugged. "Maybe just sometimes. Is that such a terrible thing?"

"I am not human."

I scoffed. "Tell that to Buffy the vampire slayer."

I smiled and after a few seconds, he let one slide on too. I'd shared my life with Eric at a time when he was very vulnerable, and that included sharing my DVD collection. Hearing him laugh at the overly acted, covered with latex TV vampires was a priceless memory that I would never forget. His laughter had been loud and merry and just plain happy, and I would probably never hear it like that again.

He stood up to full height and paced away from me. "We will never have the relationship you desire, Sookie. I will never be a normal companion to you, not the way you desire to live your life."

"Yeah, well, I don't exactly have the market cornered on normal, in case you haven't noticed," I said. "And what do you mean, the way I desire to live my life?"

"You choose to stay here out here in the woods, leaving yourself in constant peril, when you-" He paused, shifting his eyes away from me and his voice changed, like he was trying to sound casual. "Have options."

"Such as?"

He stood up again and rolled his shoulders. "That is not a conversation I am willing to have with you right now."

I knew exactly what the was thinking about, I could feel it in his blood, and I'm not as stupid as people take me for. He was talking about me becoming his human companion. Like my cousin Hadley had been to Queen Sophie Anne, only less messed up and co-dependant I could only hope. He was right, that was not a conversation I wanted to have either.

"My distance keeps you safe," he said finally.

"But what if I need you and you're too far away?"

"Compton is here," he said, plainly annoyed by his own words.

I raised my eyebrows, genuinely surprised. He was actually going to trust Bill, the one that professed his undying love for me every other day? I was beginning to understand how helpless Eric was actually feeling, and it worried me.

Eric sensed my shock, quickly adding, "He is under strict instructions not to bother you, or try to take advantage of your emotional state. I told him I'd rip his fangs out if he so much as looked at you."

"Yeah, I think he got the point," I said under my breath. That would explain the weirdness from Bill alright.

"I have also discussed your safety with the shifter. He is aware of the situation."

"Oh, Eric," I sighed. "I don't want Sam knowing my business. I cause him enough trouble as it is."

"Merlotte is more than capable of taking care of himself, and as much as it pains me to admit it, he has proved valuable in the past."

"I'm not comfortable getting Sam involved with my private life. It's...complicated with him." I had no problem saying this to him, because Eric was well aware of Sam's feelings for me, yet wasn't threatened in the least. (Stupid Viking ego.) I reminded myself every day that Sam was as good a friend as I had, but the way he looked at me was just too much sometimes. There were many nights that I had to drag myself away from that bar, knowing Sam was in there alone. Feeling the way I was feeling.

"I don't like it," he said. "But he would give his life to save yours, and that is what I must trust."

"So what, I'm under house arrest now? Is that what you're saying?"

"Would you listen?" he asked, charging back toward me. "Or would you do exactly the opposite and endanger your life without hesitation?"

"I can take care of myself, Eric," I snapped. "I will not have every supe in Renard parish lookin' out for me."

"Then you are foolish as well as you are impatient."

This was the point when I usually got flaming mad at him, when he tried to control my life and started acting all condescending and mean. But I just wasn't in the mood for it, especially being physically drained from work. I tried to wiggle past him, but he just pushed me back into the swing and held me by the arms.

"Sookie, you still fail to realize that your life is in constant danger. This isn't something you can change your mind about and back out of. You're a part of me now, and with that comes obligation."

"Obligation to who?"

"To the laws that bind my kind and have done so for thousands of years. One hotheaded telepath from Bon Temps is not going to change that."

"What about an obligation to each other?" I asked, my voice a little more gentle.

Eric just looked at me, his eyes going glassy and unfocused. He seemed speechless. Again, another first. He titled his head to the side and let out an enormous sigh. Suddenly, he looked weary and defeated and, well, very human. His shoulders sagged and he flopped himself onto the wooden swing right next to me. I wanted him to put his arm around me and cuddle me like a boyfriend sitting on a porch swing should do, but he didn't , and I could hardly be mad at him for that. He'd never been much of a snuggler, except for after sex.

Then I thought again of those few weeks when I had him all to myself, when he had lost his memory and had been the best boyfriend I could've ever wished for. He was a kind and almost gentle thing, and he let me take care of him. He wasn't possesive, unless he was trying to save my life, and he was one hell of a lover. (Well, that last one still applied.) He didn't know who he was, and he barely knew who I was, but I often wished that I could somehow mush a little of that Eric together with the Eric that I was apparently bound to for the rest of my life.

"My weakness for you has become common knowledge amongst my enemies. It puts my entire area in jeopardy," he said after a few quiet minutes. "I will not stand by and watch them destroy all that I have worked for."

I nodded distantly, not wanting to argue anymore. Telling a vampire how to run his business was like yelling in the library - you get lots of dirty looks and they mostly tell you to shut up. I knew I had started out in Eric's life as a business asset and I still was one. Usually I didn't mind that much, because working for him made me an ass-load of money. But lately, it was getting hard to see the line between girlfriend and telepath for hire.

"Still though," he continued, "I would give up all of it for you." He looked down at me with a critical glance, but his voice was gentle.

I looked at him with doe eyes. I couldn't help it - I was completely shocked. "You would?"

"I would rip Philip DeCastro to pieces myself if it meant ensuring your safety."

"They'll kill you," I said quickly. I didn't doubt his words, because if Eric was anything, he was honest with me. (He learned his lesson in Dallas.) "Or put you in silver."

"I'd like to see them try."

I felt the tears finally falling over onto my cheeks, and I instantly regretted all of the nasty things had been thinking over the past few months. "Eric..."

"Oh, don't start that," he said, rolling his eyes. He caught the tears from my face and licked them from his fingertip.

"Hush, I can't help it. Everything is just so fucked up."

"Trust me, it could be worse."

"I don't know what I'd do if something happened to you because of me," I blubbered like a fool, sniffling my already runny nose.

Eric turned to me and put his hands on either side of my head, so I had nowhere to look but into his eyes. "Listen to me, Sookie. It has taken me a long time to reconcile with these feelings I have for you. It makes no sense that after a thousand years, my life could be so completely changed by a mortal whose own life will be over in the blink of an eye. But this is what the gods have intended for me, and I am not going to turn my back on that. I know now that the urge I feel to protect you comes from my heart, not from the mouth of some bureaucrat."

That was about as many words as I had ever heard Eric say at once.

He put his arm around me and the tears really started. I nestled myself under his jacket and buried my head against his cool, sculpted chest. Something was about to happen, I could sense it brewing in his blood. Tension was building around us and I knew he was hiding something from me. I wept against his soft cotton tee shirt and just waited.

He leaned over and planted a gentle kiss on the side of my forehead, and I could hear him slowly inhaling the scent of my hair. His cool lips felt good against my skin - I always got so flushed and sweaty when I cried.

"I wish things could be different," he whispered against my temple. "I wish it because it is what you desire most. This is not the life you deserve."

"I wouldn't dare change my life," I said. "Every second of it will lead up to me and you being together some day."

"You risk your life by choosing to be with me. The future you imagine may never-"

"Shut up, Eric," I declared and his features immediately darkened. "First of all, I get it, ok? You don't have to spell it out every time we see each other. My life is in danger, I know it. I know when Bill or Bubba is fighting off someone or something out there. I'm awake half the time and I can probably hear all those creeps talkin' in their heads before those other two ever do. "

"Then I will find others to stand guard. Incompetent fools," he grumbled.

"No, they're doin' fine," I said with a frustrated sigh. "You're missing the point. I'm gonna tell you this now so I don't ever have to repeat myself again. The day I started dating a vampire is the day I decided to start living a little dangerously. I don't hold you responsible for anything that will or has happened to me. I wake up every day and make my own decisions, thank you very much. Second of all, I choose to be with you because I would rather live dangerously than without you at all. You think you're the only one that's done some soul searching over the past few months? If risking my life and occasionally ending up in the hospital is what it takes, then that's what it takes."

He sat quietly for a few minutes and barely moved, which is not uncommon for him, but I felt like I was holding my breath, waiting for a response. Finally he said, "That is a high cost to pay, for anyone."

"And you wouldn't do the same for me?"

His chest puffed up in an instant and he looked at me like the warrior he truly was. "I have sworn to protect you at any cost, you know this."

"Of course I do." My hands went to his chest like they had a mind of their own and caressed his muscles through the thin fabric. I felt a smile curling onto my lips. No matter how serious things got between us, it still made my heart flutter when he said things like that. It used to infuriate me when he'd say things like you are mine, but oh, how things had changed.

"Now you have to admit that your life has been far less than ordinary since you met me. You know, as ordinary as your life could be, bein' the owner of a vampire bar and a sheriff and all."

I saw a glint of a smile from him as well now. "Trouble does have a way of seeking you out."

"Exactly. My whole life has been drama, so something was bound to happen to me, with or without you. Being a telepathic fairy princess has its quirks, no vampires necessary."

His hand slid around my waist under my shirt and he sighed. "You make it very hard to disagree with you, lover."

I shrugged as I started up into his bottomless eyes. "I do my best."

We just sat there for a while, swinging like we were made to do it. Like we were courting and Gran was inside, peepin' out the front window. I started thinking about how different my life would be if Bill Compton had never walked into Merlotte's that night. Would Claudine have popped up eventually on her own, or maybe Naill himself? Would my great-grandfather have ever made his presence known to me if he didn't have Eric's word to protect me? Would Eric have found his way into my life on his own, somehow, or would I have been destined to swing alone?

"How long this time?" I asked finally, no longer able to wait for the inevitable truth.

"Another year, maybe more," he replied, his voice full of regret. "Just long enough for them to all lose interest in you."

"And what if they don't?"

"Oh, they will. If there's one thing you can count on, it's a vampire wanting what they can't have. As soon as they think I'm done with you, they'll move on to the next human amusement." He nudged me, adding, "Maybe I'll try to go find a waitress with X-ray vision."

I giggled and swatted at his leg. His sense of humor always had a funny way of popping up when I least expected it to. "Quit playin', Eric. I don't know how I'll do another whole year of this."

"You will do it because you must," he said. "You have a vast amount of determination within you, Sookie. You need only to believe in yourself."

"And then we'll be together, for real?"

I looked up at him, tears and snot streaked down to my neck, but I just didn't care. We'd seen each other at so many other levels worse than this. There was steely determination on his face as he lifted my chin with two fingers and stared deeply into my eyes.

"Wife, I vow to you, we will be together. We are bound to each other. Whether it be in this realm or in the next, we will be together."

He pressed his lips to mine and I felt it down to my toes. Just being next to him and hearing his voice made me feel relief. Anger be damned. After so many months of trying to remember how it felt when he ran his fingers through my hair, or how he smelled after flying through a smoky night sky, it was all coming back to me in an instant.

There was so much about him that only I got to see, and I know it's silly, but it made me feel special. He was keeping the best parts of himself just for me. He liked to snuggle and whisper war stories after we made love, and I knew he actually had a kind streak a mile wide left somewhere in his heart. He hid it away, like someone else would stash a pack of cigarettes or a fifth of whiskey, or any other nasty habit. And trust me, it was so easy to forget it was even there when he was at his usual snarky, self-serving best. But it was there, and I suspected that it was left over from his human days. After a thousand years, he'd hardened on the outside, but his heart was still good and pure.

And yes, I knew he was right - I would wait for him. Not because I'm the type of girl to wait around for a guy, but because I couldn't imagine my life without him. He'd become my savior and my best friend. I was reluctant at first, I admit, but he was the only person in the whole world that I felt comfortable being my true crazy self in front of. I didn't have to hide anything from him. Keeping up appearances was such a human thing to do, and I was so over trying to fit in as a normal person.

I put my hand behind his neck and pulled him closer to me as his kiss grew deeper. I felt his fangs slide down against my tongue and gasped when they hooked onto my bottom lip. The instant my blood flowed, he took a quick breath and pulled away. He licked the blood off his fangs and he was suddenly looking at me like a hungry animal. Apparently, he'd forgotten a few things too.

"You're mine tonight," he said roughly, pulling me onto his lap and running his thumb down the blue vein on the side of my neck.

I sucked my lip and smiled as I felt him get hard against my thighs. "Oh no, don't you try to glamour me, Eric Northman."

He chuckled and I was suddenly in the air, held in his arms like a sack of feathers. "I can't persuade you, Miss Sackhouse. You're quite impervious to my charms, remember?"

I wrapped my arms around his neck and he kissed me savagely, his fangs just barely piercing my neck over and over again, only to be healed an instant later by his lips and tongue. He walked blindly into my house, nipping at my ear lobe as he whispered, "You'll come to me of your own free will, lover. And you'll come again and again and again."

We made it as far as the living room floor before he'd ripped off my shirt and sleep pants. He was nearly naked before I blinked and he didn't bother with the preliminaries. He was in me and I was screaming, clawing at his back and shoulders. It was quick and desperate, just like it should have been for two people that hadn't touched each other for so long. He pinned my arms over my head and held steady.

"Say it," he grunted. I turned my head to the side and cried out, barely able to breathe, and he slammed into me harder. "Say it, Sookie."

I looked up at him, panting and flushed. I felt it building between both of us, then he reached down with one hand and slid his fingers to the exact spot that would make me do or say anything. "I'm yours," I sighed and then I groaned. "I'm yours."

"Forever, lover." His fangs slid out.

"Forever."

He leaned down and bit my breast, sucking hard as we both climaxed. I felt a sting of delicious pain and then I cried out with relief and giggles and joy as it swirled into pleasure throughout my entire body. Just as I was ready to fall back against the braided rug and pass out for a few minutes, I was once again scooped up in Eric's arms.

He carried me upstairs and threw me onto my bed. And I did come to him, again and again and again.