Would You Believe Me?
Summary: Naruto muses on Sasuke's leaving.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
Dear Diary,
I stare out the window. It is raining outside. The rain pelts the ground, and I sit on the windowsill just watching it fall like broken dream of many. My window is slightly ajar. I like it that way. I can feel the cool rain dancing on my face. Scenes always seem to be replay in my head. On a days much like this they seem to be brighter more vibrant.
I used to like the rain. That was before he left. The last time I had a chance to save him, it was raining. We had a glorious fight in the rain. It ended. I lost. With that loss I also lost my most precious person.
I know I'm talking out loud it's not like anyone will listen. I say, "Would you believe me if I said that you are my best friend still." I sigh and drop my head between my knees. My blue eyes always seem to be full of sadness. My friends can't even tell. They don't even know who I am.
They often ask me, "Why are you still chasing after him? Why do you bother? I've been your friend for so long. I have stayed with you. Why do you still want him?"
I often just shrug my shoulders and went on my way. Still thinking of ways to get him back. But I don't know why I want him back. It doesn't make sense. It's not right. Not natural, yet again when have I ever been.
"You were nothing but mean and obnoxious to me? Why do I want you back so bad? Is it because you were my first friend? Would you believe me if I told you that I want you back, but at the same time want you to die… with me?" I wonder aloud.
I often have these musings. I don't write them down. I think it is good that I do, that's why I am.. It helps me express myself in a more real manner, rather than my make up of an obnoxious little kid.
I don't know why I act like so. Sometimes its just to make me feel alive. I think acting is better than being morose.. But why should I do that? Now I wonder was I ever really like this? Was I ever truly happy? Or is it just a game I play with myself?
I hate the fact that I hate myself. Why should I? I think I am a good person. But I will always hate myself for not being able to save him. Why couldn't I? I saved people that don't really matter to me.
A tear rolls down my face. It mixes with the rainwater outside. Crying is my favorite hobby. It makes me sick. I feel like wretching all the time now. The feeling never leaves and never subsides.
"Would you believe me if I told you that I like you a lot?" I whisper. My whisper washes away by the strong wind, and the harsh rain beating at the ground. I stare at the horizon hoping I'll melt into it. I'm unsuccessful once again.
Why can't I like a normal person? Sakura is pretty and nice, and successful. Why don't I return the feelings of one that loves me? Hinata is kind, and modest. Why do I always pretend I don't know? Is it because I love him? Why do I fricking love a man in the first place?
"Would you believe me if I said I love you?" I shout out my words echoing in the room and escaping through the open windows.
A familiar and chilling voice says, "Yes."
I grab my head and feel blonde hair scatter across the floor.. "Stupid dumb voice get out of my head!" I cry tears fleeing from my eyes like bandits.
A hand reaches out and grabs my shoulder. I turn around slowly and face a boy, no man, drenched in rain water and mud. His eyes are a deep onyx and his hair is plastered to his pale almost translucent skin. Yet he still manages to look beautiful. "What are you doing here?" I ask venom coating my words. Leave now. I'm a poison I want to shout but hold these emotions buried inside. .
He shows a weak and rare smile. I can tell he had been through an ordeal to get here. He motions to come close. I shuffle forward but bring a kunai out just in case.
He stares at it and says, "Don't you trust me, Dobe?"
I stare at him incredulously and snarl, "Let me repeat, what are you doing here?"
"I came to visit my home town," he states as if it's the weather.
"Get out!" I scream pushing him backwards against a wall. .
Before I know it he rushes forward and slams my back into the opposite wall. His breath tickles my forehead. He's grown considerably taller. "Dobe, you're so moronic sometimes," he whispers, his breath ghosting the shell of my ear.
"Sasuke, why are you here?" I say slightly bemused.
"I came for you. I'll kill you, now. Let's spend our last minutes together," his voice reverberates through my body as he rests his chin on my shoulder.
"What the hell Sasuke? You're too late. I've gotten someone pregnant."
"No you haven't, and I do believe you. I love you too," he smirks and catches my lips in his own. For some reason even though he's soaked his body heat courses towards me as he pulls me into his chest nearly crushing me. His tongue touches my bottom lip and I open my mouth slowly. Why am I doing this? This is so wrong, but it feels so right. His tongue enters my mouth exploring it. I pluck up my courage and poke my tongue slowly into his and thus begins the battle of dominance.
In the end he wins but I don't mind. I'm still up against the wall I take my head away from his to breath and I see a crackling light in his left hand. Chidori. Before I have time to react his hand plunges through my chest. I gasp and flip my kunai out of my pocket stabbing it into his chest.
He gives me a genuine smile and whispers, "Thank you."
Sakura barges into Naruto's apartment. "Naruto! Naruto!? Get up, we need to go to Godaime-sama!"
When she hears no reply she rushes to the sound of an open window. No one is there. She run forward and sees a diary entry. It is splashed with blood. She reads it quickly. A heavy weight falls on her. She turns and looks at the ghastly sight she knows she doesn't want to see.
Naruto, and Sasuke, are connected by the lips and they are both killing each other. She sighs, and drops to her knees. She knew this would happen. She just didn't know when. She tried to save them, but they seem to have let themselves die. She reads the entry over again.
Tears brim her eyes. A shinobi must never show emotions. This time they're both gone. But she knows they've been gone for the longest time. It's over.
Where am I? I look around I am in a bright sunny place. Flowers dot the grassy meadow. I turn and see Sasuke. He is wearing a bright white robe displaying his beautiful work of art body. I smile and run towards him. Suddenly I stop. I feel a pain in my chest. Sakura is hurt, but she'll be fine. Then I turn to Sasuke and hug him. I know everything will be okay.